Circular Calls

| PA, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “Hi, does your phone number still work?”

Me: “Well, you’re taking to me…so yes.”

Brokers With Chokers

, | Salt Lake City, UT, USA | Uncategorized

(We sell all types of insurance, including bonds. I am on the phone to a customer.)

Caller: “Do you guys do bondage there?”

Me: “Yes, sir. However, the gentleman that handles that is all tied up at the moment.”

Customer: “Oh. Haha. Um…yeah.”

It’s Gonna Be A Long Call, Part 7

, | Glasgow, Scotland, UK | Uncategorized

Me: “Hello, you’re through to [insurance company]. How can I help?”

Customer: “I need a quote for home insurance.”

Me: “No problem. The quote can take up to 15 minutes. Do you have the time?”

Customer: “Yes, it’s 11:15. Why?”

Me: “Uh… what?”

Customer: “It’s 11:15. Don’t you have a clock?”

Related:
It’s Gonna Be A Long Call, Part 6
It’s Gonna Be A Long Call, Part 5
It’s Gonna Be A Long Call, Part 4
It’s Gonna Be A Long Call, Part 3
It’s Gonna Be A Long Call, Part 2
It’s Gonna Be A Long Call

Not Quite As Fast As A Fox In A Fire

| New Zealand | Uncategorized

(The customer is having difficulty with our website. One of the common reasons is using an incompatible browser.)

Me: “Okay, maybe it’s a problem with your browser. What web browser are you using?”

Customer: “Mozzarella filofax.”

Business Must Be Slow

| UK | Uncategorized

Me: “Hello, you’re through to [phone company]. How can I help?”

Customer: “I’ve just tried to top up my phone and it won’t work. Can you put it back on?”

Me: “Sorry, that number is now cancelled. It cannot be reactivated as it has been recycled.”

Customer: *horrified* “How dare you! That number belongs to me! It is absolutely vital I get that number back. It is my business number! You people are costing me money and putting my livelihood at risk! I’ll sue! This is a disgrace!”

Me: “Madam, that number has been disconnected from your account for seven years. It has been used by two other customers since you last had it.”

Customer: *click*

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