Some Old Bags Can Never Be Fixed

, , , , | Right | March 21, 2020

(I am a cashier and usually have no one to help me bag groceries. I scan as quickly as I can and then bag as they are paying. Sometimes this causes a bit of a line, and I don’t have a backup cashier, so I bag as quickly as possible, as well, grouping boxes and cans, produce and bread, etc. I’m helping an older woman while a line forms behind her. After exchanging pleasantries, I finish scanning and begin to bag while she pays.)

Me: “Your total comes to [total].”

Customer: *scans card*

(I begin to bag, placing a small box with some canned vegetables. Suddenly, the customer starts yelling.)

Customer: “Are you trying to kill me?!”

Me: *confused* “I’m sorry, ma’am, could you explain?”

Customer: *grabs the bag I had just filled* “You put this rat poison in with my canned goods!”

Me: “I’m so sorry! I wasn’t paying attention to the boxes when I put them in. Let me rebag that for you!”

Customer: *calming down* “Jesus. Kids these days. Didn’t you learn anything in Bag Boy School?!”

Me: “Ma’am, there’s no such thing as Bag Boy School. Once again, I’m very sorry and have sorted out the issue.”

Customer: “That’s the problem with all you kids today!” *grabs bag and leaves the store in a huff*

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Unfiltered Story #190320

, , , | Unfiltered | March 21, 2020

Me: Hello and thank you for calling **** my name is connor how can I help you.

Customer: Yeah my car was supposed to be picked up today and now I’m out $300.

Me: I do apologize about that sir, what is you first and last name so I can look up your file?

Customer: It’s under [Name]

Me: The search yielded no results, did you happen to have the number you submitted for contact? It appears it didn’t come up under the number your calling from.

Customer:*Yelling* What do you mean you can’t find it? What kind of operation are you running here?

Me: Unfortunately sir I cannot confirm what the issue was unless we’re able to bring up your information. Could it have been under another name?

Customer: No it most certainly is not you guys promised a Saturday pick up.

Me: Wait your vehicle was scheduled for today? We don’t do pick ups on the weekend in that area could you have spoken with another company?

Customer: *Resumes Yelling*NO I SPOKE WITH [Co-Worker’s First Name] AND I’M GOING TO CALL IN ON MONDAY AND ASK FOR [Co-Worker’s First Name]. I’M ALSO GOING TO LOOK HIM UP ON FACE BOOK! YOU TELL [Co-Worker’s First Name] I’M COMING FOR HIM. *click*

Me: *Turning to my co-worker* How does he think he’s going to find someone on facebook only knowing their first name. My name isn’t common and there’s still thousands of me on facebook.

Coworker: *Facepalms*

Help Me First: A Mantra

, , , | Right | March 20, 2020

(There is a drive-thru window at the fast food restaurant where I work, and while I am assigned to drive-thru, a very large group of children and their parents come in on their way to a soccer game. There are two people working the dining room line, and I am in charge of the orders at the drive-thru. I never ignore a customer, but I try not to make eye contact with the customers at the front if I am getting food for the drive-thru, so they know someone else will help them in a minute. However, if they talk to me, I let them know the situation.)

Customer: *at front* “Excuse me?”

Me: “Hello, sir! I’m sorry, I am currently in charge of the drive-thru, but [Coworker] or [Other Coworker] will be with you in just one moment!”

Customer: “No, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about. You need to ignore the drive-thru until you’re done helping us.”

(There are about thirty people in the store, and it will take a while to get them all situated; all the while, my drive-thru is also very busy.)

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “We’re part of a soccer team, and we are on our way to a game. We’re in a big hurry! If you could just please ignore the drive-thru for a while, it’s very important that you help all the people I’m with!”

Me: “Sir, I’m sorry, but drive-thru customers are just as important as customers that are inside the restaurant. I can’t just leave them waiting while I help you, especially because I am currently the employee in charge of the drive-thru.”

Customer: “But I don’t understand. Why can’t you just stop working on the drive-thru and come take my order? We are in a very big hurry!”

(At this exact moment, my drive-thru indicator rings, telling me that a person is at the sign, ready to order.)

Me: *to the front customer* “[Coworker] or [Other Coworker] will be with you as soon as they can! I hope you have a great day!”

Customer: “Wait! Come back! I want a—”

(When he finally was done ordering with my coworker, he tried to complain that I wasn’t doing my job right. They weren’t able to explain it to him, either.)

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You’re Going To Be Bouncing Back And Forth For A While

, , , | Right | March 20, 2020

(I am assisting a customer over the phone for an order that was damaged during shipping.)

Customer: “I tried to email you at the email address on your packaging, and it bounced back. That’s poor customer service!”

Me: “I am very sorry. What was the email address you were sending to, so we can resolve that?”

Customer: “Www-dot-[Company]-dot-com-slash-save20.”

Me: *head-desk*

(I did try to explain the difference between an email address and a website, but I don’t think she ever really got it. I had to keep apologizing for the bounced-back email.)

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Well, That Escalated… And Escalated…

, , , , , , | Right | March 20, 2020

Customer: “Can I use this coupon?”

Cashier: “No, it’s expired.”

Customer: “That was a rhetorical question. I’d like to use this coupon.”

Cashier: “It’s expired.”

Customer: “Well, what does that mean?”

Cashier: “It means I can’t accept this coupon.”

Customer: “And why not?”

Cashier: “Well, for one thing, we don’t have the item it’s discounting anymore.”

Customer: “What?”

Cashier: “It’s not on the menu.”

Customer: “But you could still make it.”

Cashier: “No.”

Customer: “Well, can I use this for something else?”

Cashier: “No.”

Customer: “Ask your manager.”

Cashier: “It’s expired.”

Customer: “You don’t know that. Ask your manager.”

Cashier: “There’s an expiration date printed in the corner.”

Customer: “You haven’t even asked.”

Cashier: *to the manager* “Got a second?”

Manager: *to the cashier* “I don’t. Hang on.”

Customer: *to both* “I’ll wait.”

(He waits. The cashier waits. Everyone in line waits.)

Manager: “Okay, how can I help?”

Customer: “What can I use this coupon for?”

Manager: “Nothing. That coupon is expired.”

Customer: “But you don’t have this item.”

Manager: “Good point. It’s expired and we don’t have that item.”

Customer: “So, can I use it for something else?”

Manager: “No.”

Customer: “Why not?”

Manager: “The coupon’s for that. And it’s no good anymore.”

Customer: “Can I use it for this menu item?”

Manager: “You can’t use it at all.”

Customer: “Well, what about this one?”

Manager: “You can’t use an expired coupon.”

Customer: “Call the owner.”

Manager: “I am the owner.”

Customer: “Call the real owner.”

Manager: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “The corporate owner. Call the CEO.”

(If this case doesn’t make it to the Supreme Court, I’m going to be severely disappointed.)

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