John, Party Of Noooo

, , , | Right | November 4, 2019

(I work as a hostess in a popular steakhouse. On this particular night, we are busy and have a wait and my general manager is running the desk. Our hostess desk is right by the bar, which can be very loud.)

Manager: “Good evening! Welcome to [Restaurant]. We are on a 30- to 45-minute wait currently. Can I get your name and number in your party?”

Customer: “John for two.”

Manager: “Great. Can I get a last name?”

Customer: “No, just John.”

Manager: “Sir, we have a long list here and it would be easier if I had a last name.”

Customer: “No, just John.”

Manager: “John is a very common name; I wouldn’t want someone else to take your place because their name is John also.”

Customer: “I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU!”

Manager: *pauses* “Sir, may I have a last name to ensure we have the right party coming up when your table is ready?”

Customer: “I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU!”

Manager: “Okay, then John, party of two.”

(When the name John was called, no one came up.)

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Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 21

, , , , | Right | November 4, 2019

Customer: “I need you to fix my glasses.”

Me: “I would be happy to do that. Unfortunately, because of the fire earlier this week, the power to this department keeps going out and I can’t use the frame warmer to fix them without power. Would you like to leave them here? I’ll get them fixed and you can pick them up later.”

(We are open despite the fact that the power to the back room keeps cutting out, the fans drying the carpet and walls from the water used to put out the fire make it difficult to hear, and we have to keep moving the furniture to make sure the walls and carpet dry properly so they won’t mold.)

Customer: “I’ll come back Saturday; will you be here? I want you to fix them.”

(Today is Tuesday.)

Me: “I’m not on the schedule for Saturday. [Other Coworker] will be here then, but if you specifically want me to fix them, I suggest you leave them here and come back to pick them up.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “I’m pregnant.”

Customer: “So?!”

Me: *standing up and gesturing to my huge stomach which was only slightly smaller when she’d bought the glasses a few weeks before* “I’m due this Saturday. If I go into labor, I won’t be coming into work. I’ll be in the hospital.”

Customer: “But you’ll be back on Monday?”

Me: “No, if I have the baby, I’ll be on maternity leave for three months.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: *thinking* “Seriously, why do you think?”

(I finally convinced her to leave them, which was good because I went into labor that Friday night and was in the hospital giving birth and recovering on Saturday.)

Related:
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 20
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 19
Cause For Pregnant Pause, Part 18

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It’s Definitely Decaf!

, , , , , , | Working | November 4, 2019

I order a coffee drink from a well-known coffee shop via their mobile app so I can pick it up on my way to work. I’m mildly lactose intolerant so I order all my drinks with coconut milk. When I arrive to collect my drink, I notice they put whipped cream on top. The whipped cream isn’t enough to bother me, but in my experience, they don’t usually put whip cream on dairy-free orders.

I flag down a barista to make sure my drink was made with coconut milk. He examines the drink, and says he believes he made it with regular milk and will remake it. At this point, I’m already running late for work, so when he hands me the remade drink, I grab it, thank him, and rush out the door without paying much attention to it.

When I finally get to work, I look at my drink and notice it’s a very light color. I take a sip and realize that they didn’t put any coffee in my coffee drink. It’s nothing but milk and syrup. Luckily, I am able to run to a different store on my lunch break and get it replaced, but how do you forget to put coffee in a coffee drink?

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Their Opinions Are Jumping All Over The Place

, , , , | Right | November 4, 2019

(I work at an amusement park at three different rides: a bungee-jumping-type ride with an extremely high drop, a rollercoaster, and a chair swing ride that’s very popular with smaller kids. I’m at the bungee jump ride when two teenage boys get off.)

Coworker: “Did you have fun?”

Boy #1: “That was so pathetic!”

Boy #2: “I know, right?! They need to make the drop like, three hundred feet taller for me to be scared.”

Boy #1: “The rides here really aren’t that thrilling at all. Maybe I’m just too hard to scare.”

(Later on, I move to the chair swing ride and notice the same two boys lining up. They’re talking quietly to each other but I can still hear their conversation.)

Boy #1: “I dunno. This looks really intense.”

Boy #2: “Look how high it goes!”

Boy #1: “Come on, we can do this.”

(I had to fight the urge to remind them of their previous feedback at the bungee jumping ride.)

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Unfiltered Story #174576

, , , | Unfiltered | November 3, 2019

( I work as a waiter in a popular “fancy” restaurant. It is my third day on the job. I am currently serving a man and his wife.)
Me: Hello! My name is (My Name), and I will be your server tonight. Our wine of the day is-
Wife: Wait, you serve alcohol? YOU SERVE ALCOHOL? I’LL HAVE YOU KNOW WE ARE AGAINST ALCOHOLIC DRINKS!
Man: Yeah! We demand that you stop serving alcoholic drinks and that you never serve it again.
Me: (Taken aback) Um… It’s not my choice to stop a certain product… You’ll have to talk to the manager or owner…
Man: WHAT THE F**K! WE JUST WANT TO HAVE A NICE MEAL AT A NICE RESTAURANT THAT DOESN’T SELL F*****G ALCOHOL!
Me:… I don’t think there are any nice restaurants that don’t sell alcohol. The only restaurants with no alcohol are some kid ones, but they aren’t very nice.
Woman: OH MY GOD! WHAT DOES IT TAKE?! WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO GO TO A NICE RESTAURANT WITHOUT ALCOHOL?! WHAT?!
Man: WE ARE NEVER RETURNING! F**K YOU! F**K THIS RESTAURANT!
(They both storm out, and I am just dumbfounded. My manager decided to give me a raise for having to deal with that.)