Refuses To Register The Line

, , , , | Right | September 28, 2017

(It’s a busy day in the store, and I’m called up to the front, since the lines have gotten long. I get up there to find that a customer has her cart-full of items laid out on the counter of my register. I stand there for a second, unsure of what to do, until another customer asks me to open.)

Me: “Um, excuse me.”

Customer: “Oh, do you need this register? I’m just counting my things.”

Me: “Yes, sorry. They assign me to a register, and I can only use this one.”

Customer: *annoyed, she starts slowly putting the items back into the cart* “Is there somewhere else I can do this?”

Me: “Unfortunately, no.”

(I sign in, but can’t call anyone over because she is still blocking my register. The customer gets about half of her items into the cart, when she pauses and says:)

Customer: “You know what? I might as well check out. Can you just ring me up?”

Me: *making eye contact with all the people who’ve been waiting* “Well, you could ask the people in line if they’d mind if I took you before them.”

Customer: *somewhat testily* “I’m not going to ask them.” *finally clears enough room for me to call the next in line*

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Should Have Put A Lid On That Comment

, , , | Right | September 28, 2017

Me: *while finishing a customer’s order* “And would you like a lid on your ice cream?”

Customer: “Sure. Wait… what does a lid do?”

Me: *speechless*

Customer: “It just keeps the ice cream in while you’re driving, right? I’m okay, then.”

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The Most Annoying Growth In The Room Isn’t The Tumor

, , , , , | Working | September 28, 2017

(I’m visiting my doctor for a checkup following a surgery to remove an early-stage cancerous tumor. When the checkup is finished, the physician asks me if I have any other questions or concerns.)

Me: “Well, actually, I’m worried about [hormonal disorder]. I’ve a fam—”

Doctor: *cutting me off* “You don’t have that.”

Me: “What? My mother has this disorder, my sister has just recently been diagnosed, and we’re fairly certain my grandmother had it, too. Plus, I noticed—”

Doctor: “You don’t have that. If you did, we’d be seeing [other, unrelated symptom], and we’re not. So, you don’t have it. Anything else you want to ask me about?”

(Irritated, I told the doctor that I didn’t have any more questions, and left. I ended up contacting a different doctor for a second opinion. The new doctor asked me about my symptoms and medical history, and then immediately sent me for diagnostic tests. It turns out that I DO have the disorder, and a fairly severe case, too! She couldn’t believe it when I told her that my usual doctor wouldn’t even look into my concerns, when all of my symptoms and history pointed to this disorder. It just goes to show you the value of getting a second opinion, and that it’s okay to “fire” your physician if they aren’t doing a good job!)

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If Life Gives You Lemons, Make Gluten

, , , , | Right | September 26, 2017

(I am working as a waitress, and a group of two adults and three children sit at a table in my section.)

Me: *speaking to one of the children* “Do you know what you want to drink, sweetheart?”

Child #1: “Lemonade.”

(I repeat the same question to the next child and her response is also “lemonade,” and I write both orders down. I then repeat the question to the next child, and he looks at his mother.)

Child #3: “Mommy, can I have a lemonade?”

Mother: *to the child* “No, you can have water or milk. Which do you want?” *to me* “He has several food allergies; he can have milk or water, but no nuts or gluten… Unless your lemonade is gluten free!”

Me: “I can assure you, ma’am, that there’s no gluten in our lemonade.”

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Gladiatorial Combat Is Kosher

, , , | Learning | September 26, 2017

(I am in an upper-division theatre history class that is primarily for drama majors, no first-year students. One of the professor’s favorite sayings is, “The only stupid question is the one you don’t ask.” On this day he is lecturing about popular Roman entertainments: gladiator vs. gladiator, gladiator vs. lion, lion vs. Christian, and so on. One student raises her hand.)

Student: “Were the Romans still mostly Jewish at this point?”

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