The Leg Bone Is Connected To The Wing Bone

| CO, USA | Working | November 15, 2016

(I’m on my lunch break and head to the cafeteria that services the office where I work. Today’s special is barbecue chicken, which is rotisserie chicken which has been quartered, and the sign says you can select either dark or light meat. The employee who is manning the station is new.)

Me: “I’ll have a dark quarter and two sides, please.”

(The employee picks up a piece with the wing attached.)

Me: “No, dark meat, please; a leg quarter.”

Employee: “This one?”

(She has selected a different piece, also with a wing.)

Me: “No, the leg, please.”

Employee: *picking up a third piece, also wrong* “How about this one?”

Me: “I want one with the leg, please. How about that one.” *pointing to a leg quarter*

Employee: “Oh, I didn’t know there was a difference!”

No Booze During Your Snooze

| New Zealand | Working | November 14, 2016

(I’m working as a barista at a well-known coffee chain. My coworker is at the register and is serving one of our regular customers when this exchange happens.)

Coworker: “Your total comes to [amount]. Was there anything else we can help you with?”

Customer: “Yeah, can I get an extra shot of ‘will to live’ in my coffee?”

Coworker: “Sorry, sir, we don’t serve alcohol before 11 am.”

Not Even Sugar-Coating It

| England, UK | Working | November 13, 2016

(I need to reduce my sugar intake for health reasons and was looking at drink options in a café. I didn’t want a hot drink, so I was looking at the cans available, all behind a glass counter where customers couldn’t reach one. I wanted to check whether a supposed “health” drink was high in sugar.)

Me: “Hi. Do you mind if I check the nutrition information on [“Health” Drink]?”

(The guy behind the counter gets the can in question and immediately opens it and pours the drink into a glass.)

Me: “Apparently not, then.”

Guy: “What?”

Me: “I asked to see the nutrition information.”

(The guy looks annoyed and hands me the can. The drink has a ridiculous amount of sugar in it.)

Guy: “That’s [price].”

Me: “I’m sorry, I can’t drink this.”

Guy: “You ordered it. You need to pay for it.”

Me: “I didn’t order it. I asked to look at the nutrition information to see if I wanted to order it but I can’t drink this because it has over 30g of sugar in this can.”

Guy: “Like you care about eating sugar, fat b****.”

(That’s when I walked out.)

How To Make A Vegetarian Fuming

| UK | Right | November 10, 2016

(We sell hot jacket potatoes in our shop. These are baked at the start of the day, and then kept in a hot display cupboard. An hour before closing time we turn the hot cupboard off so it can be cleaned safely. Customers who want a potato after this point can have them reheated and served for a lower price. Also note: the hot cupboard also contains breakfast items like bacon and sausages.)

Customer: “I’ll have a reheated jacket potato, please.”

Cashier: *puts potato in a container, then goes to put container in microwave, and while doing so removes a sausage roll that was inside*

Customer: *suddenly shouting* “Excuse me, but I’m a strict vegetarian! I can’t eat ANYTHING that’s been that close to meat!”

Cashier: *confused* “But they haven’t touched at all! The potato is in a box!”

Customer: “But the FUMES will contaminate it!”

Cashier: *looks at hot cupboard, which has bacon displayed prominently* “Really?”

Customer: “Well, if you’re not going to accommodate MY needs, I’ll take my business elsewhere!”

Doesn’t Take A Surgeon To Work Out

| USA | Related | November 10, 2016

(I read about a psychology research on gender bias which used the riddle about a father and son being in a car crash; the father dies and the son goes to the operating room. But the surgeon says “I can’t operate – that’s my son!” The answer is that the surgeon is the mother. However not many got this. I asked this question to a group of friends, all of them are on the LGBT spectrum. 1/16 guessed mother. 11/16 guessed gay fathers. 2/16 guessed both. 2/16 only gave other answers. Here are some gems.)

Friend #1: “Are you sure it was the father who died? It must have been the mother who died but dressed as a man.” *guessed gay fathers later but couldn’t guess mother*

Friend #2: “One parent must have been FTM and the son was born before the sex change.” *guessed gay fathers later but couldn’t guess mother*

Friend #3: “The father who died wasn’t the real father. His wife cheated on him and the surgeon is the real father.” *only gave this answer*

Page 6/39First...45678...Last