Totally Misread That Situation

, , , , | Right | March 27, 2018

(I’m working in a quick-service cafe with different stations for sandwiches, soups, and salads where the customers order off menu placards overhead. Two customers, a middle-aged woman and an older man, are at the front of the line.)

Older Man: *squinting and pointing vaguely at signboards where dozens of items are listed* “What does that say?”

Me: *thinking he has poor eyesight* “Oh, we have some hand menus here if you have trouble making out the signs.”

Older Man: “Can’t you just read them to me?”

Me: *looking at the crowd of customers behind him* “Well, there are other people waiting to be served. I’ll be happy to get back to you after you’ve looked over the menu and decided what—”

Woman: *interrupting loudly and angrily* “He’s illiterate!

Me: “Uh… I’m sorry. I didn’t realize–“

Woman: “You should be ashamed of yourself, making fun of his disability!”

Me: “I wasn’t making fun of him. I didn’t realize he couldn’t read. I just offered a menu because I thought perhaps his eyesight was poor.”

Woman: “Well, you shouldn’t make assumptions! You’re DISCRIMINATING AND REFUSING TO ACCOMMODATE HIS DISABILITY!”

(At this point everyone in the line is staring, and the older man looks mortified.)

Woman: “See? This is why I have to go with him everywhere. Can’t you see you’re embarrassing him? YOU’RE SO INSENSITIVE!”

Me: “Ma’am, all I did was offer him a menu, which you were capable of helping him with discreetly, instead of making a scene and announcing that he can’t read. Now, please, step out of line so I can help these people who are ready to order, and return when you’ve made a decision.”

Woman: “No. We don’t want to be served by a bigot. We’ll get our lunch from a different station.” *to the man* “You’re going to have the soup. You can just point at what you want over there.”

(She shoots me a death glare and walks away with her nose in the air. There is a long silence and the man stands there for a moment with his gaze averted to the floor before following.)

Next Customer: “Whoa, that was awkward.”

(Later, my manager approaches me.)

Manager: “We got a complaint about you today. Were there any incidents?”

Me: “Yeah, I think I know who you mean. Some lady was yelling at me earlier because I offered her friend a menu when he couldn’t read. That was pretty much it.”

Manager: “Wow. She told us you were making fun of him, and also said that you refused to serve ‘an illiterate moron.’”

Me: “What?! No, I never said that! I just asked them to let me serve other customers while they made up their minds.”

Manager: “Yeah, that really didn’t sound like something you would say, but the guy looked so upset I thought I’d check.”

(We never saw them in our establishment again, but I hope that poor guy doesn’t have to go through that everywhere.)

Are you often annoyed by people? Well, misery loves company. Join us at our Antisocial collection in the NAR Store!

Be The Extra Change You Want To See In The World

, , , , | Right | March 23, 2018

(I’ve just started work in a coffee shop. A group of teenagers walk in and order, and I think that’s the end of them, until one of the girls walks up while I’m taking the next customer’s order.)

Me: “I’m sorry. You’ll have to join the line—”

Girl: “Yeah, I know, I’m sorry. But I counted our change and you gave us an extra $20.”

(She holds out a $20 note for me. Stunned, I let it stay there for a second, before finally processing that someone had just complained about being given too much change.)

Me: “Oh! Thank you.”

Girl: “It’s rush hour and you’re the only one in here; I can’t blame you. Have a nice day, all right?” *walks away*

(It was the best day I’d had in a long time!)

Like, Hashtag Young People LOL

, , , , , | Working | March 16, 2018

(I work in a cafe that is situated inside a supermarket. I am inducting a new person who has informed me this is his first ever job. He is 16.)

Me: “You get free drinks throughout the day, a sandwich, and muffin, cookie, or cake of your choice with your break. So, you can pretty much live on coffee, if you want.”

Coworker: “Like, totes!”

Me: “What sort of drinks do you like?”

Coworker: “Like, everything! Like, I love coffee!”

Me: “Yeah, coffee is pretty good.”

Coworker: “#lols!” *pronounced “hashtag el-oh-els”*

(We continued with the induction and he was quite eager to get stuck in. We decided to put him on the register, and he did a good job, despite many people not really understanding his slang. I added him to our WhatsApp group at the end of our shift. He literally ends everything with, “lol,” and sends us so many pictures of random stuff, all with, “#me,” underneath. Most of us older employees have muted the group, along with some of the younger ones. They seem to understand him more. I just find it rather funny, though. I guess it’s an age thing, as he’s fine, otherwise.)

A Fruity Bunch

, , , , | Right | March 10, 2018

(A group of Chinese tourists come into our café. They clearly know each other well. When it comes to names:)

Tourist #1: “Mango.”

Tourist #2: “Apple.”

Tourist #3: “Banana.”

Tourist #4: “Grape.”

Tourist #5: “Strawberry.”

Tourist #6: “Peach.”

(My first thought was they decided to have fun, but given all the lists of weird English names of Chinese people I’ve seen, I have to wonder if those are actually their English names, perhaps picked out together?)

From Sweet To Bitter In Less Than One Bite

, , , , | Right | February 14, 2018

Customer: “I can’t have chocolate, because I’m diabetic. You have to stop me if I order anything with chocolate in it.”

Me: “Oh, okay. What can I get you?”

Customer: “A big slab of millionaire’s shortbread and a large mochaccino, please.”

(When I advise her that both of those contain chocolate, she becomes irate and abusive, and screams and demands a manager.)

Customer: “Your staff is insulting me. She’s refusing to sell me anything sweet, saying I’m fat and should be dead. I’m very upset!”

(The manager looks at me, completely confused, as he knows I’m not that confrontational. When I try to speak, the customer spins even more outlandish tales, such as me questioning her husband’s virility and sexuality, and suggesting she become bulimic and die on the toilet.)

Manager: “I… I just can’t believe [My Name] could say all this in the five seconds I was in the kitchen. All I heard from her was, ‘Okay,’ when you mentioned your medical condition.”

(The customer went wide-eyed and left briskly.)

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