Giving You “All Kinds” Of Feelings

, , , | Right | April 2, 2020

(I’m taking a break from my bike trip through the woods at this café. I’m on my own, and I’m quite alternative looking. Today, I’m wearing baggy three-quarter jeans with lots of metal detailing, and a shirt that says, “Devil Inside.” 

An elderly couple sits one table away. The man flags down a waiter and I hear him saying this:)

Elderly Man: “It’s not that I want to complain or anything. I really don’t, because there’s no problem at all. But just so you know, you’re doing a great job with accepting all kinds of people to this place.” 

(I had no idea how to respond or what to think of it, and I still don’t.)

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Ordering To Go, Just Not Going Right Now

, , , | Right | March 30, 2020

(I work in a small café that offers a food selection of mostly baked goods and a few hot items. The customer has ordered several hot items, and the transaction has proceeded normally until after she has paid and I have handed over the receipt.)

Customer: “Now, don’t start my food yet. I’m going to come back later, and show you my receipt, and you can make it then.”

(My store has never offered a service like that; we don’t have the fridge space to keep food for a later order aside, and we wouldn’t want to run out of an item that a customer had “reserved,” so we don’t allow orders like this.)

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but I can’t do that for you. I can wrap the food up for you to-go—”

Customer: “No, I don’t want it to-go; it won’t be hot then. I just want to come back and get it later.”

Me: “I’m sorry, I can’t take an order now that’s not supposed to be made until later. If you’re worried about a line, we have online ordering which you can do on your phone, so you can just pick it up when you’re ready.”

(The online ordering also doesn’t allow for customers to set a time to pick up; as soon as an online order comes in, it goes straight into our queue.)

Customer: “No, I paid for the food, so I should get it when I want it.”

Me: “Ma’am, you paid for the food right now. Our service provides the food when it’s ordered; we can’t keep food on reserve for you.”

Customer: “But I have my receipt.”

Me: “That doesn’t matter.”

Customer: “I wouldn’t cut line or anything, I’d just wait and then show you my receipt.”

(Internally, I wonder why she wouldn’t just wait through the line and reorder later, but I just stick with what I’ve been saying.)

Me: “Ma’am, I can’t do that. Our system isn’t set up for orders like that. I can give you your food now, or I can refund you, but that’s all.”

Customer: “Fine. Refund me.”

(Later that afternoon, when I was clearing tables, I saw her still sitting in the café, but she never came up to reorder her food. I’m not sure if she was running some type of scam, or if she really just didn’t understand that “I can’t do that” means that I can’t do that.)

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Unfiltered Story #190598

, , , | Unfiltered | March 25, 2020

(I am the customer in this story and am turning myself in. I’m from the United States, and at the time was living in London, so I felt as if I was comfortable with various English accents, but am somewhat unfamilar with Welsh accents. I stopped at a café for a bite to eat and am ordering at the counter when this exchange occurs…)

Me: I’ll have a [coffee drink] and oh, what’s your soup of the day?

Barista: [unintelligible]

Me: I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch that?

Barista: [unintelligible]

Me: *thinking it’s maybe a local speciality* Okay, what’s in it?

Barista: [same unintelligible phrase as before]

Me: *giving up* I’ll have that…

(And what was the mystery soup? Tomato and basil. To the barista’s credit, he wasn’t muttering or anything, and other than the tomato and basil, I understood him just fine. To this day, that tomato and basil soup was the best I’ve ever had!)

Unfiltered Story #190588

, , | Unfiltered | March 25, 2020

(I work at a popular bakery/cafe chain, who also happen to provide table service. Note that we do have a patio. As I’m returning to the counter to grab a tray, the person who ordered it is close behind me.)

Customer: Oh that’s mine I’ll take it, thanks.

Me: Alright! Just to let you know, if you place your tracker on your table next time, we’ll bring it to you!

Customer: Oh cool! Even on the patio?

Me: Yes of course!

Customer: Ok, thanks! By the way, how do I get outside?

(I had to show him to the door he came in.)

Sorry, Owner, You’ve Got It Very Very Wrong

, , , | Working | March 11, 2020

(A couple of friends and I decide to go check out the new French cafe that has opened in our town; we’ve heard nothing but positive things about it. The owner, however, has a reputation in town for being a really nasty woman to her staff. I’ve frequented a few of the cafes she’s owned and never had or seen an issue… until today. What I ordered comes out very wrong. I politely approach the young man in the shop and tell him the issue. He is polite and apologetic and begins to sort it immediately. This is when the owner barges up to our table.)

Owner: “Is there a problem?”

Me: “Yeah, our order was wrong. It’s no big deal, though. I’ve told the young man and he was more than happy to sort it out, and we’re more than happy to wait. No big deal.”

Owner: “We don’t get it wrong. Obviously, you forgot what you ordered.”

Me: “Right… No, yeah, see, this is what we ordered—” *explains order* “—and this is what we got. It’s no biggie.”

Owner: “Right.”

(She marches over to the young man and begins to berate him, in front of the entire cafe, blaming him for our order being incorrect, calling him a dumb f***er, etc. The insults are endless, and it’s extremely uncomfortable and heartbreaking to watch. I get up and walk over.)

Me: “Excuse me. He wasn’t the one who took our order, and the way you’re treating him is abysmal. It was her, and the older gentleman.”

Owner: “Like f***, it was her. She doesn’t get things wrong.”

Me: “Well, this time she did, and it really was no big deal… but I feel uncomfortable, so I think I’d rather just have my money back and we’ll go elsewhere.”

Owner:Nope! No money back. Get the f*** out before I put rat poisoning in your food.”

Me: “Wow, you really are delusional. I want my money back, for real. I’m not leaving until I get it.”

(At this point, she had the female behind the counter threaten me. After a small argument, we got our money back and left, as we walked out, we noticed the young man bawling his eyes out in the shadows. We comforted him and told him karma would prevail. It did; I ran into him a few months later and he’d dragged her through court and won a massive sum of money.)

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