Use Your Inside Voice Invoice

| Tulsa, OK, USA | Extra Stupid, Money

(I work in a cafe and store that serves a large corporate staff which works in the building, and only them. I am in the back office working on orders and balancing accounts when I overhear an exchange between a member of my staff and a customer escalating.)

Cashier: “Okay, ma’am, all told that will be $11.30.”

Customer: “Ya’ll are too f****** proud of your f****** food. No way in h*** am I paying that!”

Cashier: “I am sorry, ma’am, but all our prices are clearly posted and this is the total for the items you have selected.”

Customer: “Like h***! I worked in food, I know how it works, and this is overpriced! I want to see your b****-a** manager; where’s he hiding!?”

(I come out of the office and address the customer.)

Me: “Ma’am, I have heard, quite clearly, everything you have said, and I assure you the prices are right.”

Customer: “Prove it. Prove that the s*** cost you four bucks!”

(I dig through my paperwork and find the appropriate invoice and bring it out to the customer. She looks through it with an expert eye.)

Customer: “See! F*** you! This s*** should have only been like $13!”

Cashier: “Okay, ma’am, that’ll be $13.”

Mugged Of Coffee Common Sense

| Adelaide, SA, Australia | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Funny Names

Me: “Good morning, sir, what can I get for you?”

Customer: “A mugachino, thanks.”

(I ring it up as a large cappuccino as we’ve figured out that’s what most customers who order a ‘mugachino’ want. After a few minutes I take the coffee to him.)

Me: “Here you go, one large cappuccino.”

Customer: “I didn’t order a cupachino! I ordered a mugachino! Where is my coffee?!”

Me: “A mugachino refers to a cappuccino in the largest cup available, sir… That is a large cappuccino.”

Customer: “I want a mugachino. Now go get me my d*** coffee!”

Me: “Of course, sir, sorry about the mix up. I’ll get that right away.”

(I walk around the corner to the coffee machine, sprinkle a bit more chocolate on top to make it look different and return with the same coffee.)

Me: “Here you go, sir. One mugachino. I must have mixed your order up with another customer.”

Customer: “About time… How hard was that? Gosh, I am never coming back here!”

Cappuccino-no

, | SA, Australia | At The Checkout, Food & Drink

(I’m waitressing when one of our baristas calls me over. She asks me to go to one of the tables and confirm that the elderly customer had ordered a long black and a cappuccino, as she had forgotten to write it down. The customer confirms this, and I take the order out to the customer and her husband who has now joined the table.)

Me: “Okay, long black?”

Customer: “Thank you.”

Me: “And your cappuccino, sir.”

Customer: “That was supposed to be a flat white!”

Me: “I’m so sorry; I thought I confirmed with you that it was a cappuccino.”

Customer: “Yes, but I forgot what my husband usually orders!”

(The husband spoke up and half-heartedly told me a cappuccino will do. I apologised again and then walked off wondering what part I had to be sorry for!)