When Tubby Puddings Are Just Desserts

, , , , , , | Related | September 21, 2018

(My father could be quite cruel with some of his comments when I was growing up. Despite not being in great shape himself, his biggest issue was the food we ate. Being typical kids, we liked unhealthy snacks, and each time we ate them my dad would start ranting about being unhealthy and making quite rude comments. Recently, my mother has told him off a few times for being meaner than usual. One year, we go on holiday from the UK to the US to visit some family friends. A couple of times during the journey, we eat at fast food places, and my father begins griping about how much “crap” we are eating. He’s especially tough on me, the youngest, and seems convinced that I’m going to become massive, which doesn’t help. After a couple of days with our friends, their parents announce we are getting take-out for dinner and ask the kids what they would like. We all respond that we want pizza. When it arrives, we all go to the table and excitedly await a slice. However, instead of a slice, my father puts a white carton on my plate. Confused, I open it and find it’s full of stir-fry vegetables which I certainly I didn’t order.)

Me: “Dad, this isn’t mine!”

(My dad shoots me a blank stare:)

Dad: “Eat your dinner, please.”

Me: “But Dad, I didn’t order stir fry!”

Dad: “Eat what you are given, now!

Me: “BUT I WANTED PIZZA! WHY DOES EVERYONE ELSE GET TO EAT IT?”

Dad: *angry* “I DON’T CARE! YOU’RE GETTING FAT, AND I WON’T HAVE MY SON BECOME A TUBBY PUDDING! NOW, EAT UP AND SHUT UP!”

(After he finishes his rant, there is a tense silence in the air. All around the table, everyone, including our hosts, are giving him very dirty looks. Immediately, my dad looks sheepish.)

Dad: “Umm… I was just worried about what he was eating… That’s all.”

(He quickly sits down and reaches for the pizza box. To my surprise, my mum slams the box shut and picks up the stir fry carton. She then dumps half the contents on his plate.)

Dad: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I’m trying to eat!”

Mum: “You’ve gotten fat, and I won’t have my husband become a tubby pudding! Now, eat your dinner!”

Dad: “This isn’t fair!”

(My mum gives him a nasty look.)

Mum: “EAT UP AND SHUT UP!”

(People at the table giggled at this one, and my father looked furious but had to bite his tongue hard. After dinner, my dad tried to tell my mother off, but she loudly berated him for his “bullying tactics” and scolded him for being so mean to his children, especially when he was also eating the same amount of garbage we were! Thankfully, my father seemed to take the hint and became less controlling as the years went along. He could still be a difficult character, but the old mean-spirited man seemed to die out. His attitude apparently didn’t impress their friends, since we were never invited to visit again! As a father myself now, I understand the importance of children eating well, but I will never resort to the bullying tactics of my father.)

A Physical Education

, , , , , , , | Learning | July 7, 2018

(I was always a clumsy kid, and as such, I’ve experienced my fair share of broken bones. Sixth grade is the first time I’ve ever needed crutches, and, because I am smaller and am considered “weird” by the other kids, I have been dealing with a lot of bullying. A boy steals one of my crutches during gym class for the second time in a week and humiliates me by poking me with it and telling me to chase him for it while the class laughs. I end up in the office, filing an incident report, and it is far from the first I’ve ever filled out.)

Administrator: “Honey, has this been going on for awhile?”

(I nod, still in tears.)

Administrator: “Okay, listen up, baby girl. Next time that boy tries to take your crutch, you have my full permission to take the other one and smack him upside his head with it. Nobody should be treating anybody like that.”

(I was stunned. When the kid got back from in-school suspension two days later, he tried to do it again, calling me “a little snitch b****.” I did what I was told to do, though I missed and ended up hitting him across his backside. He started to cry, and his mother came in the next day to complain, but was promptly told that it was done in self-defence and that he had been harassing me for months before this. The mother threatened legal action, but never went through with it, and the boy never bothered me again. I loved that administrator for sticking her neck out for me.)

I’m Not Trapped In Here With You…

, , , , , | Learning | November 29, 2017

(In my middle school choir class, I’m the quiet overachiever who is bullied quite frequently. I can change my mood in a split second, and can set a mood with just my voice. These girls are making fun of me for still going trick or treating; Halloween is my favorite holiday, and I love dressing up. [Mean Girl #1] decides to get the whole class’s attention just to make fun of me.)

Mean Girl #1: “So, [My Name], what are you dressing up as this year?”

(She says it in a condescending baby voice that makes the rest of the class laugh.)

Mean Girl #2: “You going as a princess? Why aren’t you wearing your costume?”

(I receive more laughs from other students.)

Me: “I am.”

Mean Girl #1: “I don’t see it, princess.”

(I get this dead look on my face, relaxing all the muscles in my face except for my eyes, which I make wide on cue.)

Me: *quoting Wednesday Addams from “The Addams Family” in my spot-on impression* “This is my costume. I’m a homicidal serial killer; they look just like everybody else.”

(The room is silent; you could hear a pin drop. I go back to my work, putting on my happiest face as I scratch away markings on my music with my pencil. Everyone in the class is still staring at me.)

Mean Girl #1: “Are you serious?”

Me: “I’m always in costume.”

Needs To Step Down

, , , , , , | Right | September 26, 2017

(It is a slow day on my shift. There is just one customer, sitting at a table with his food and laptop, when a slightly annoyed-looking man comes in with his two teenage daughters.)

Me: “Hello, welcome to [Donut Shop]. What can I get for you?”

Customer: “I’ll have a medium hot coffee with cream and sugar.”

Daughter #1: *rather timidly* “I’ll have a maple-frosted donut.”

Daughter #2: “Hmm…”

(She takes some time, about half a minute, looking at the donuts behind me.)

Customer: *turns to [Daughter #2]* “Stop taking so long! You’re wasting the cashier’s time. Make up your mind.” *turning to me* “Sorry it’s taking so long. My daughters can be so problematic.”

(I just stand there and smile, not really knowing what to say.)

Customer: *speaking loudly* “They’ve been nothing but trouble to me and my wife. Always doing bad things behind our backs. You know they almost got us in trouble with the police once?”

(Both girls are now looking nervous and casting their eyes down on the floor. The first one looks scared and second one looks frustrated. I find his statement hard to believe, because they seem like the “good-girl” types, but I say nothing because it’s obvious that he’s annoyed. The customer with the laptop is raising his eyes up to look at them.)

Customer: “Just a bunch of good-for-nothings. So, spit it out, what do you want?” *cuts her off before she can speak* “You know what? She’ll just have a coffee roll, like last time.”

(I ring them up for their purchases. The man pays with his card, I get the donut and coffee roll in a bag and give it to them, but I tell them they’ll have to wait a bit for the hot coffee. The man and second daughter leave to wait in the car, leaving the first daughter to pick up the coffee after it’s finished.)

Me: “Okay, here you go.” *hands her the coffee*

Daughter #1: *takes it, speaks solemnly* “Thanks. Oh, and by the way… he’s my stepfather.”

Me: *in total shock* “Oh…”

(The customer on his laptop perks his head up real fast at this, and we both stare after her as she leaves the shop, wiping roughly at one eye. My coworker comes up from the kitchen, shaking her head.)

Laptop Customer: “I’m gonna bet the ‘police trouble’ they had was either one of the daughters trying to report his sorry a**. I’m only sorry it didn’t work.”

Coworker: “I’m just more appalled that this is the man their mother chose to marry!”

(Whether the man really was their stepfather or not, I have something to say to him: “You are a d*****-bag, and verbally abusing anyone is not cool.”)

Trying To Put The Finger On The Problem Child

, , , , , | Learning | September 19, 2017

(The school I work at has a great program in the summer, where international students come to Canada and check out the school. During their time, they experience Canadian culture and practice their English skills. We do have some young students come as well, and I work with a group of 7-11’s. Before class starts, I notice that there is some bullying happening. Since they’re the younger group, often when I speak to them, I use a lot of visuals or hand signs to communicate. I decide to address the issues I have seen.)

Me: “Morning, everybody. Before we get started, I just wanted to remind everybody about the rules we decided on for the class. One was treating each other with respect, and I did not see that this morning. Remember: in this classroom, we only say positive things. So only this:” *gives thumbs up* “None of this:” *gives thumbs down*

Student: “Or this.” *gives me the middle finger*

(I had a moment of shock, and then told the student to wait outside while I called the supervisor to come talk to him. However, I was really thinking about what a good segue that was, and how I couldn’t admit I was impressed.)

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