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Get Them To The Church On Time

, , , , | Right | May 21, 2019

Caller: “Can I get a [premium service] taxi?”

Me: “Well, we do require a half-hour notice for that and—“

Caller: “But it’s my wedding day!”

Me: “…”

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Doesn’t Get The Fundamentals Of Waiting

, , , , , | Working | April 8, 2019

It’s lunchtime and we arrive at a casual place. The menu, the combos, and the system are a little confusing but we manage to order. The woman on the register is clearly on a working holiday, so the language and our multiple accents add to the confusion.

My companion and I sit at an outside table and comment on how her attitude didn’t help but at least we got there. After a few minutes, she comes out from behind the counter and outside to our table and says, “Your food is ready. You need to come in and get it.”

Yes, she came out empty handed to tell us to come in and get it!

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Can’t Make A Name For Yourself

, , , , , , | Right | March 14, 2019

(I work in a food court. Someone in a different store has the same name as me, and we often work the same shift. We look nothing alike.)

Me: “Hi. What can I help you with today!?”

Customer: *noticing my name tag* “Hey, that girl over there has your name!”

Me: “Yep, she sure does.”

Customer: “You’ve got the same name! Are you sisters?”

Me: *after a pause* “Yes, our parents gave us the exact same name.”

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Would You Like To Sign Up For The Card That’s Already In Your Hand?

, , , , , | Working | January 12, 2019

(I have been serving a line of customers when my manager approaches me and starts berating me for not asking for the customer’s loyalty card. The customer had given me their card along with the stock they were purchasing; we are supposed to ask before taking payment.)

Me: *holds up card* “The customer gave it to me first; I’ve already entered it.”

Manager: “Hmph. You didn’t ask the last customer, either.”

Me: “They had their card ready, too.”

Manager: “Well, I’ve been standing here while you served six customers, and you didn’t ask a single one for their cards or ask them to join.”

Me: “They all had their cards ready for me.”

Manager: “Yeah, sure. That’s what you say.”

Me: *pulls up my transaction records on the screen* “Why don’t you take a look yourself? You will see that the last ten customers I’ve served have been cardholders.”

Manager: *in a sulky voice* “Well… you are supposed to ask every time or get them to join up.” *stomps off*

Next Customer: *holding her card out to me* “You better ask for me for this; I don’t want you to get in trouble because of me.”

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Not Your Call That They Can’t Call

, , , , , | Right | January 1, 2019

(We’re in a food court of a gas station. I answer a phone call.)

Me: “Good afternoon. [Company], [My Name] speaking.”

Caller: “Oh, hi, are you near [Chain]?”

Me: *thinking she’s asking for directions* “Yes, we’re in the food court at the back, so if you drive—“

Caller: “I was there for lunch about half an hour ago, and I left my wallet and phone on the table right in front of [Chain]. Can you see if it’s still there?”

(There are about nine tables that could be “right in front of [Chain],” and all of them are occupied.)

Me: “All the tables have other people sitting at them.”

Caller: “But can you see a pink wallet and phone sitting on the table?”

Me: “The people at those tables have phones, but I don’t—“

Caller: “Is it a black [Brand] with a green case with a pink wallet?”

Me: “I’m sorry; I can’t see brands, and all the tables are occupied right now.”

Caller: “It’s the table right in front! Is my wallet and phone there?”

Me: “I can’t see anything except people holding phones, rubbish, and food.”

Caller: “What’s the number for [Chain]? I’ve tried calling [number], but they’re not answering.”

Me: “They’re very busy right now. I don’t have their number.”

Caller: “What’s the number for [Service Station]? They’re not answering, either. You’re the only one who did answer.”

Me: *people are lining up at my store and I’m the only one serving* “The whole centre is very busy at the moment.”

Caller: *sigh* “Can you see my phone and wallet right in front of [Chain]?”

Me: “No, I cannot see your phone and wallet, but I can ask the other stores if they have had anything handed in. I’ll call you back; what’s a number I can call you on?”

Caller: “Didn’t you hear me? I left my phone there!”

Me: *wondering how she’s calling* “I have a queue forming here; it’s easier if I call you back.”

Caller: “I’ll wait.”

(I serve five customers before asking the other retailers and the cleaning crew if anything has been handed in. No luck.)

Me: “I’m sorry, I’ve asked everyone and nothing has been handed in. I can take your number—“


Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t see your phone or wallet. I suggest calling [Chain] and leaving your contact number in case it shows up. Have a lovely afternoon.” *hangs up*

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