Thinking Outside The Box Regulations

, , , , , | Working | January 3, 2018

(I’m opening boxes with my manager.)

Manager: *looks over at me* “Hey, [My Name], do you know the safety regulations for opening boxes?”

Me: “Yeah. Use a box cutter, only have as much blade revealed as needed, and cut away from yourself.”

Manager: “And you are?”

Me: “Using scissors and cutting towards myself.”

Manager: “…”

Me: “Just because I know the safety regulations doesn’t mean I’m going to follow them.”

A Variance In The Rules

, , , , | Working | January 3, 2018

(I work at an amusement park. Around midday we get super busy at my store. The Team Leads are the only ones allowed to void a transaction or do returns.)

Team Lead: “You bag; I’ll cash people out.”

(I am put on bagging while the Team Lead uses my account to do transactions. At the end of the night, after I am counted out by a supervisor, I have a $20 variance.)

Supervisor: “Was anyone besides yourself using your till?”

Me: “[Team Lead] got on it when we were busy.”

Supervisor: “Why would you allow that?”

Me: “Since [Company] doesn’t allow associates to void transactions anymore, it’s a pain to get the Team Lead whenever I need a void or a return.”

Supervisor: “You shouldn’t have allowed that. Now we can’t be sure who caused the variance!”

Me: “Can I ask why you won’t let associates void things anymore? We use to be allowed.”

Supervisor: “The Heads were worried about associates stealing money, and they felt it gave the associates too much power. You know teenagers can be really iffy; we fired two associates for stealing already.”

Me: “But now, I have no power over my till, and I could be fired since this is my second large variance!”

Supervisor: *clearly annoyed at Corporate* “I know! The rules are being made up by people who haven’t worked in retail for over 20 years. Don’t even talk to me about that! But regardless, you can’t blame your Team Lead because the Heads will just say they’re doing their job. I have to just have you sign off on it and hope we just miscounted.”

(Luckily, I wasn’t called about that variance, but the next time the Team Lead tried to take over my till I told her no, and I wasn’t fired.)

We’re Not On The Same Page

, , , , , , | Working | January 3, 2018

(I work in a web development company. My boss is generally a smart man, but oblivious. I am one of the most qualified techs he’s got, and I also work as a project manager. I am also his only female tech. We are on a video call with a somewhat unhappy client. We have been missing pages and building stuff wrong, but according to my documentation, we are doing what we should. I have been apologising to the client all morning.)

Boss: “Well, you will really have to make up for the lost time. What is it this time?”

Me: “A page I didn’t know we needed.”

Boss: “Why not?!”

Client: “It’s right there, on page 10!”

Me: “I’m looking at page 10, and there is nothing.”

(We are talking about a wireframe.)

Client: “Your secretary can’t read, [Boss].”

Me: “I am not a secretary, and I don’t think we are looking at the same document.”

([Boss] starts looking real shifty, and runs off to fetch his laptop. He brings it to me and shows me the document he has, on page 10, with the necessary info, and all the other stuff we have been getting wrong. Wanting to save face, I assure the client it will not happen again. He thanks me for my effort, looking a little sheepish at his mistake about my position, and I turn to my boss.)

Me: “Why didn’t you give me that document? This is twice as long as the one you gave me!”

Boss: “Well, I assumed you could figure it out.”

Me: “Without the brief?”

Boss: “I just assumed you’d have it! Now, go and fix your mistakes.”

Writing You A Blanco Check To Stay

, , , , , | Working | January 3, 2018

(I’m the only office administrator at my job who is fluent in Spanish. Despite this, my boss has been underpaying me, and all of his other workers that aren’t his family. I’ve just handed in my two weeks, as I’ve found a job that pays almost twice as much for almost the exact same job.)

Boss: “You can’t quit! What about our customers?”

Me: *shrugs* “You can find and hire someone else in that time, I’m sure.”

Boss: “Not someone white!”

(Suddenly my two weeks turned into now.)

He Kids You Not

, , , , , | Working | January 2, 2018

(I am the head store manager. One of the department supervisors has recently gone through a rather dramatic divorce. For a few months, he has gossiped to all of us about his ex, who claimed he was irresponsible, much to his anger. With the holiday season approaching, we have a meeting of all management and supervisors one Sunday night. I’m out front handling some customers when one of my employees comes out. The supervisor has arrived an hour early and has his kid in the back stockroom, which is against the rules; it’s full of palettes, boxes, and machinery. I head to the stockroom and find the child climbing on a rack with no shoes on, his father nowhere to be seen. I ask the kid to sit, and ten minutes later the supervisor appears from the break room.)

Me: “You know you cannot let non-employees in the back, especially not a minor!”

Supervisor: “He’s just playing. I have custody of him this week, so I had to bring him with me.”

Me: “You can’t bring your kid to a business meeting.”

Supervisor: “It’s okay; there’s lots of girls around the shop to keep an eye on him.”

Me: “Absolutely not. You need to arrange a babysitter, or miss the meeting and take the write-up.”

Supervisor: “Hey, I’m just trying to be a parent.”

Me: “You’ve known about this meeting for a month. Most of the management are parents; they’ve all found babysitters ahead of time.”

Supervisor: “Ugh, I’ll try calling my sister.”

(He calls. I agree to let them stay in the break room until his sister arrives, and head to my office to prepare for the meeting. Fifteen minutes go by, and I hear the supervisor talking to one of our security guards, then he knocks on my door.)

Supervisor: “Hey! My kid is hungry.”

Me: “Yes, and?”

Supervisor: “You got any graham crackers or goldfish or anything in your purse?”

Me: “No.”

Supervisor: “My mom and my ex always have food for him in their purse, but you’re, like, the third female I’ve talked to, and none of you have anything!”

Me: “I don’t carry food for your kid.”

(The supervisor shrugs and leaves. His sister arrives just before the meeting starts and we can hear an argument as she picks up the kid. The rest of the management team is gossiping while we wait on him.)

Coworker: “He asked if his son could play with my phone, because he didn’t want the kid accidentally breaking his!”

Supervisor: “Hey, sorry I held up the meeting. My sister was being a b**** because I didn’t have shoes or a coat for my kid.”

(Since then, we have had no problems seeing why his ex thought he was irresponsible!)

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