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Ring Me Up And Shut Me Down

, , , , , , | Right | November 20, 2012

(I’m grabbing a few sundries after filling my car up. The only other people in the store are a young girl at the register and a customer she’s serving. I take no interest in them until I suddenly hear the customer screaming.)

Customer: “Get me your manager, now! You’ve worked your last shift at this place, you worthless b****!”

Cashier: “I certainly will, ma’am, but I was merely—”

Customer: “No! Not another word! I am the customer; the manager will believe whatever I tell him. Now stop stalling and get him for me!”

(The cashier sighs and disappears into the back room, returning with said manager a moment later.)

Manager: “Is there a problem, ma’am?”

Customer: “I’ll say there is! This incompetent s*** rang my gum up twice and then laughed in my face when I told her to correct the error. I’m certain she rang all my other stuff up incorrectly, as well. I demand you kick her to the curb!”

Manager: “I see…” *to the cashier* “Is this true?”

Cashier: “Well, just the part about ringing up her gum twice. I apologized and fixed the error immediately.”

Customer: “Bulls***! You’re lying!”

Manager: “Could you bring the transaction up, please?”

Customer: “She’s lying! She f****** laughed in my face!”

Cashier: “Ma’am, I was only smiling. I promise.”

Manager: *checking the register screen* “Hmmm, I see she did correct her error, and everything else was rung up properly.”

Customer: “FIRE HER!”

Manager: “Ma’am, may I ask you a question first? Namely, who are you?”

(She states her full name, job title, company, and the location of her office, which is a small brokerage firm in the nearby town.)

Manager: “Hmm, can’t say I’ve ever heard of them, or you. Nevertheless, let me ask you this: why should I fire this girl whom I’ve worked with for three years, has never missed a day without good reason, is always on time for her shift, and has been described by several of our regulars as one of the most courteous ladies they’ve ever met, over a simple mistake which, as I’m seeing here, she quickly corrected?”

Woman: “Wha? But… I… you… because I’m the customer!”

Manager: *nods* “Well, I’m sorry, ma’am, but I don’t see how that’s a valid reason to side with someone I don’t know from Adam, and thus lose a model employee whom I know to be perfectly trustworthy and respectful. Is there anything else we can help you with?”

(With that, the customer screams, shoves what’s on the counter at the manager, and storms out.)

Manager: *to the cashier* “If I believed every windbag who came in here ranting incoherently, I’d never be able to hang onto any staff. I’ll be in my office if you need me again.” *disappears into the back*

Me: *stunned* “My God. That was awesome!”

Cashier: *beaming brightly* “Whole reason why I love my job!”


This story is part of our I Love My Job roundup!

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Some Bosses Won’t Be A Party To Anything

, , , | Working | October 8, 2012

(When I arrive to start preparing for the dinner shift, I see that we have a reservation for a birthday party with 13 guests, and that they’re due to arrive about 30 minutes after we open. I organize everything essential quickly and then begin to move tables together so they’ll have enough places to seat everyone at one long table.)

Manager: “What are you doing?”

Me: “Setting up a table for the reservation of 13.”

Manager: “You don’t need to do that now.”

Me: “Uh… they’re coming in just half an hour. I should really have it ready before they arrive.”

Manager: “You can just do it when they get here.”

Me: “They shouldn’t have to stand around and wait for me to do something that I could have done before they arrived, and by the time they get here, we might have other customers as well. I’d rather set up the table now and avoid the stress.”

Manager: “There’s no stress in that situation. You’d have to do it. No stress for me!”

Me: “But we’d be forcing a party of 13 to stand in the entryway while the tables get set up.”

(My manager gives an exasperated sigh at this point but gives in. Though I was planning to move the tables myself, he ends up helping push three four-seaters together.)

Manager: “There, done.”

Me: “That’s only 12 seats. We’ll need to put one more of the two-seat tables on the end here.”

Manager: “All 13 probably won’t show up. They’ll just end up having a big empty table.”

Me: “Isn’t it better to just assume they will and not make fools of ourselves?”

Manager: “I don’t want to move them right now.”

Me: “You don’t have to. It’s just one table; I’ll do it.”

Manager: “You don’t need to.”

Me: “I’m going to anyway.”

(I move the last table over and then set up menus, glasses, napkins, and cutlery for 13. While I’m doing this, two other small tables arrive, so I am right that we’d have other customers by the time the party of 13 arrived.)

Manager: “You’re just going to look silly when all 13 of them don’t show up.”

(Two minutes later, the birthday party arrived. All 13 came at once!)


This story is part of our Birthday Party Roundup!

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Mortarboard And Hassle

, , , , | Working | July 12, 2012

Me: “Hey, [Supervisor], I know it’s two months away, but I wanted to let you know I need my graduation day off.”

Supervisor: “That’s fine, but you need to put the request in the system two weeks before. But I’ll be sure to approve it.”

(A month and a half later…)

Me: “[Supervisor], I just put the request for my graduation day off into the system.”

Supervisor: “Oh, great; I’ll approve it right now.”

(The next day…)

Me: “So, am I all set for graduation?”

Supervisor: “Oh, I completely forgot! Let me do that right now.”

(This continued EVERY work day that week. Lo and behold, the next week’s schedule comes up with me on for my graduation day.)

Me: “I thought you said I was all set to have the day off?”

Supervisor: “Well, now that you’re on the schedule, you’ll need to find someone else to cover it for you. Too many other people were given the day off.”

Me: “But… You said…”

(My supervisor leaves me there with my jaw on the floor. Just then, my store manager walks by.)

Store Manager: “Hey, [My Name], what’s wrong?”

Me: “My supervisor wants me to work my graduation day.”

Store Manager: “Did you request it off in the system?”

Me: “Yes.”

Store Manager: “Oh, I see. I’ll take care of this!”

(When my shift ended that day, I saw that I was no longer scheduled for my graduation day. Even better: she made my supervisor cover for me.)

The Only Thing He Should Be Running Is Scared

, , | Working | June 25, 2012

(This takes place at a 24-hour drugstore on Thanksgiving. We’re having a big toy sale and are very busy. I’m on the top rung of a ladder pulling items for customers below me when this takes place.)

Me: “I’m so sorry for your wait, you guys. If you give me just one more moment, I’ll get everything you’ve asked for!”

Customer #1: “Oh, honey, it’s okay. You guys are so busy!”

Me: “Thank you, ma’am. I don’t think we truly anticipated how busy we’d be. You wanted one ‘Cars’ fishing game and a Tinkerbell flowers fishing game, correct?”

Customer #1: “That’s right.”

Customer #2: “Well, with a sale like this!”

Me: “Can’t argue with that, sir! You wanted the flying fairy princess doll, is that right?”

Customer #2: *laughing* “Well, I don’t, but my niece will love it.”

Me: *to Customer #3* “…and ma’am, you wanted the Disney Princess tea set. Is that right?”

Customer #3: “That’s right! Wow, you’ve got a good memory!”

Me: “Thank you! ”

(At this point, my boss, who has barely exited his office all day, walks up.)

Boss: *to me* “Hey, someone is waiting to use the bathroom. Go let them in.”

Me: “Okay, it’ll be just a moment. Where’s [Coworker]?”

Boss: “On break.”

Me: “But they’ve only been here 45 minutes.”

Boss: “So?”

Me: “I’ve been here six hours, and you haven’t let me take a break yet. Also, more importantly, I’m busy right now.”

Boss: “Well, that person needs to use the restroom. Go do your job.”

Customer #3: “Sir, I mean no disrespect, but clearly she’s doing her job. Do you not see her on top of the ladder? Why don’t you just let them in yourself?”

Boss: “That’s not my job. It’s my employees’ jobs…” *snidely to me* “…even if they’re trying to be lazy.”

Customer #2: *to my boss* “What is your job?”

Boss: “To make sure the store runs smoothly.”

Customer #1: “You’re doing a poor job of it.”

Boss: *turns bright red and grits his teeth* “…and just who are you to judge?”

Customer #1: “A customer.”

Boss: *waves her off*

Customer #2: *very serious* “You are NOT too good to help your employees. Just because you are in a management position does not exempt you from helping. You should go let that customer into the restroom. And after this young lady is done helping us, you should make sure she takes her lunch.”

Boss: “I make the store run! You can’t tell me how to run my store!”

Customer #2: “No, you don’t ‘make the store run.’ Your employees do. And this young lady has been running her tail off since I’ve been here. You have no idea who I am, do you?”

Boss: “Someone who has no idea how the store works?”

Customer #2: *laughs* “No, I’m [Customer #2].”

Me: *startled* “From district?!”

Customer #2: “That’s right, and I think…” *to my boss* “…you and I need to have a LONG talk.”

(At this point, I finally get to the bottom of the ladder and start handing out the items.)

Me: “Here you go everyone. Thank you so much for your patience and have a Happy Thanksgiving!”

Boss: *to me* “Just go get coworker and take your lunch!”

([Customer #1] and [Customer #3] wished me the same, while [Customer #2] — who was in fact from corporate — dragged my boss into the office for that “talk.”)

Chemically Imbalanced

, | Working | June 23, 2012

(I have just started work with a new company to get some experience during my senior year of college. This happens during my first week.)

Boss: “Okay, I need you to take all these chemicals out of this barrel and put them in the cabinet here.”

Me: “Sure, no problem. So why are they all thrown into this barrel? Just using it to move them around?”

Boss: “No, actually, the EPA tried to confiscate all of them, but I stole them back!”