The Twilight Of Our Literacy

| Exton, PA, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Hi, how can I help you today?”

Customer: “I’m going on a 25 hour plane ride, and I was just trying to find something to read.”

Me: “Okay, what kind of books do you read?”

Customer: “Young adult stuff, like romance stuff.  OH!  Or something with vampires.”

(I walk her over to the young adult section.  And show her a series with vampires. There are six books in the series and each book is quite small–not even 200 pages.)

Me: “Well, you might like this series. They’re easy books to read, but really good. I’ve read them.”

Customer: *flips through book* “It seems boring.”

Me: “Oh. Well, I can assure you it’s not.  They are quite action-packed.”

Customer: “I mean it looks wordy. Like, there’s a lot of words in it.”

Me: “Well, yeah…most books have words in them.”

Customer: “Hmm…I’ll think about it.”

(She ended up buying 3 teen magazines.)

A Revelatory Thought

| San Diego, CA, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “Excuse me, I have an important question.”

Me: “Sure, what can I help you with?”

Customer: “You know a lot about the Bible, right?”

Me: “Well, not everything entirely.”

Customer: “Okay. Can you tell me what part of the Bible does Narnia come in?”

Rejection Incognito

| New York, NY, USA | Uncategorized

(A young boy walks in. It is February.)

Me: “Hello, is there something I can help you find today?”

Customer: “Hi, do you remember me?”

Me: “No, sir, not really.”

Customer: “C’mon, you’re going to tell me you don’t remember me? Remember, I came during the summer! Oh, I know why!” *takes off hat* “How about now?”

Me: “Sorry, still nothing. Is there anything I can help you find though?”

Customer: “No, I just came in to see if you remembered me.” *walks out dejected*

Canada: America’s Hat, Part 2

| Boston, MA, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Hi, can I help you?”

Customer: “You’ve got an accent.”

Me: “Yeah, I’ve heard that. I’m not from here.”

Customer: “You’re American?”

Me: “Yeah, I’m from upstate New York.”

Customer: “But American, right? You’ve got a visa? You need one to work here?”

Me: “No, I don’t have a visa–”

Customer: “Holy s***! You’re illegal? They know you’re illegal here?”

Me: “I’m not illegal. I’m from upstate New York, near Canada.”

Customer: “Oh, if you’re from Canada, you’re not really illegal then. Canada’s like America, just different. Welcome to our country. I’m looking for a book. You probably only read books in Canadian, but I can help you with the language and you can find me a book here.”

Related:
Canada: America’s Hat

The Dolly Llama’s New Groove

| New York, NY, USA | Uncategorized

(As I am organizing books on a display, I overhear this exchange.)

Customer 1: *pointing at a copy of “The Path to Tranquility”* “Ooh, look! That’s the Dalai Lama! I saw him once!”

Customer 2: “You saw him?”

Customer 1: “Yeah! He was in Florida doing a thing! I saw him out walking with all his little llamas.”

Customer 2: “Um, little LLAMAS?”

Customer 1: “Or dollies, whatever!”

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