Your Argument Doesn’t Hold Water

| Tempe, AZ, USA | Books & Reading, Math & Science, School, Uncategorized

(At the college bookstore where I work, students can sell their books back for cash at the end of the semester.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I won’t be able to buy your textbook back because of the water damage.”

(I flip through the book’s crinkled, sticky pages.)

Student: “Oh, it’s okay. It’s not water damage, it’s humidity. I went on vacation to Missouri and it was humid.”

Me: “I still can’t take your book back because I cannot sell this to another student in this condition.”

Student: “But it’s not water damage! It’s humidity! Humidity made the pages stick together!”

Me: “Ma’am, what is humidity?”

Student: “Water, duh!”

(There’s a pause while the wheels begin to turn in her head.)

Student: “Oh…can you help me find my other books, then?”

Misunderstood Comic Strip

| Colorado Springs, CO, USA | Uncategorized

(Two middle aged women approach me.)

Customer 1: “Excuse me? Can you help me find something?”

Me: “Sure, ma’am. What are you looking for? Gift ideas maybe?”

Customer 1: “Yes exactly, I need a present that will interest a 14 year old boy.”

Customer 2: *interjecting* “But not porn!”

Me: “I think I can accommodate those taxing conditions.”

Questionable Answers

| GA, USA | Uncategorized

(I’m in the comics section, helping a man find a present for his daughter. I’ve picked up a book by a popular artist.)

Customer: “It looks nice, but I already got her one of these things for her birthday. I don’t want to give her the same gift twice.”

Me: “Are you sure? This book came out pretty recently. Did yours have the same title as this one?”

Customer: “I don’t remember.”

Me: “Did the cover have the same colors as this?”

Customer: “I don’t remember.”

Me: “Is there anything you recall about the book you got for her birthday?”

Customer: *after a long, thoughtful pause* “It was made of paper!”

Life Is Stranger Than Fiction, Part 2

| Washington DC, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “I’m looking for a book. Something about glass. Breaking glass?”

Me: “Well, do you know if it’s fiction or nonfiction?”

Customer: “Sorry. What?”

Me: “Is it real or imaginary?”

Customer: “I mean, it’s real. How do you imagine a book? Is that what audio books are?”

Related:
Life Is Stranger Than Fiction

Queer As Folk Re-Vamped

| Melbourne, Australia | Uncategorized

Customer: “Hey. You were talking about vampire books with the last customer?”

Me: “The’yre here on the wall next to the counter.”

Customer: “Do you have any gay ones?”

Me: “Do you mean as in homoerotic literature?”

Customer: “Yeah.”

Me: “Oh, no. Have you tried [romance bookshop] across the road?”

Customer: “Why would I go there? I just want gay vampires.”

Me: “Well that’s generally a subsection of romance, not Sci-Fi.”

Customer: “I don’t want romance! I just want gay vampires!”

1 Thumbs
1,727
VOTES
Page 65/98First...6364656667...Last