Wrote A Captain’s Log

| Columbia, MD, USA | Related | August 26, 2014

(I’m browsing the science fiction section of a bookstore. A teenage girl and her mother are also.)

Girl: “Oh, look! William Shatner wrote a book! I wonder if it’s any good?”

Me: “Well, I hear he writes about as well as he acts…”

Girl: *perplexed* “Is that good?”

(Her mom and I just smile at each other.)

Saying Bi To Singledom Any Way Possible

| Torrance, CA, USA | Right | August 23, 2014

(I’m female and helping an elderly customer and his 18 year old grandson at the register. As I am ringing him up, he starts up a conversation.)

Customer: “How would you like to go out with my grandson?”

Me: *smiling* “I’m sorry, sir.”

Customer: “Aw, come on.” *points to grandson* “He’s good-looking and needs someone.”

Me: *feeling a little awkward* “I have a boyfriend. Sorry, sir.”

Customer: “Why are all the cute ones always taken?” *takes bags and leaves the store*

(30 seconds later, a male coworker notices the customer’s receipt still in the register. He grabs it and runs out of the store to give it to the customer. My coworker walks back into the store a few minutes later.)

Me: “You know, that customer just tried to hook me up with his grandson.”

Male Coworker: “…he just tried to do the same thing to me.”

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Not Very Closed Minded

| CA, USA | Right | August 20, 2014

(It is 20 minutes after closing, and I am helping my coworker count the drawers. The phone rings, and typically, by protocol, we do not answer if it is the local area code. However, the area code for this number matches head office’s, so we decide to pick it up if they try calling again. Sure enough, the phone rings a second time with the same number. My coworker picks it up and relays the rest of the conversation to me afterward.)

Coworker: “[Bookstore], [City].”

Customer: “Hi, are you open?”

Coworker: “No, I’m afraid we closed a half hour ago.”

Customer: “Oh. Well, when are you open?”

Coworker: “10 am.”

Customer: “Okay… Can I ask you a question about a book?”

Coworker: “…10 am.”

(He hangs up.)

Coworker: “Next time, I’ll ask them to hold and then pick up the phone at 10 am tomorrow and say, ‘Okay, I can take your question now.’ That’ll show ’em.”

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Toying With The Books

| Lithuania | Right | August 19, 2014

(We close at 3 pm on Saturdays. There’s a small supermarket next door. It’s Saturday, 2:55 pm. A customer walks in.)

Customer: “Hello, I need some help. A friend invited me over to her house, and she has a small child. She told me not to get him anything, but I really think I should. I think I could get a book or a toy.”

(I proceed to show him some nice children’s books, but he’s awfully indecisive and takes a long time deliberating over each one of them. He also wants it super cheap, but good. It’s now 3:10.)

Customer: “I don’t know. This is so hard! Maybe I should get him a toy instead.”

Me: “Well, a toy is also a good option. I have to warn you, though, that they usually come more expensive than books.”

Customer: “You know what? I think I’ll go to [Supermarket] and look at some toys. If I don’t find what I like, I’ll come back here.”

Me: “If you decided to get a toy, that’s fine, but we’re closing. You won’t be able to come back if you change your mind.”

Customer: “No, I’ll go to the supermarket. I’ll come back later.”

Me: “Sir, we’re closing. In fact, we’ve been closed for 10 minutes already.”

(He appeared not to hear a thing I said and walked out of the store. I closed the store. I left some 10 minutes later, and on my way to the bus stop walked past the front doors. There was the same customer, banging on the locked door, with the CLOSED sign on it and the lights out inside, yelling to be let in!)

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Decisions Derisions

| Malaysia | Right | August 19, 2014

(I work in a remainder bookstore. We have a notorious customer who comes in few minutes before closing to browse books. She doesn’t buy them. She reserves her browses for months and pays for them even later.)

Customer: “Since you released my reservations, I want you to find my books again. I am buying them today.”

Supervisor: “Sure, why not. After all, we are only closing in two minutes.”

Customer: “Oh, two minutes? Then make it quick!”

Supervisor: *relentlessly fulfills her terrible demands, and getting angrier by the moment* “Would you kindly make your purchases now? We are way past closing time.”

Customer: *suddenly breathes heavily, tearing up and her arms were flailing* “YOU CAN’T DO THIS TO ME! WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME DECIDE NOW? I AM YOUR CUSTOMER!” *proceeded to run around the store*

Supervisor: “Miss, please! We will reserve your books and you can come tomorrow.”

Customer: “I can’t come tomorrow! I am very busy! I have a meeting tomorrow and I have to cook for the kids!”

Supervisor: “You can come after your working hours.”

Customer: “No! You can’t make me decide! Don’t do this to me! You can’t make me decide!”

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