A young woman has come in looking for a particular title. I can’t find it in our system nor on the database, but after a few minutes, I am able to track it down. It turns out that this particular book was only published as an ebook and was never physically printed. My store does not deal in ebooks, so there’s nothing I can do.

Me: “Ah, looks like that one was never printed; it’s only available as a digital ebook online.”

Customer: “Oh, well, can you order it for me?”

Me: “Unfortunately, no, I can’t. You’ll have to buy a digital copy through [Website] or [App] if you want it.”

Customer: “Okay, but I just wanted to look at it before I buy it, you know?”

She isn’t upset or angry or being difficult in any way at all; she just genuinely doesn’t seem to understand the concept of an ebook. That said, I am fast running out of ways to explain it to her.

Me: “Ma’am, it’s only available as an ebook,  as in electronic. It was never physically printed.”

Customer: “I get that, but it’s an expensive book, so I want to look at it and make sure it’s what I need, so can you just order it for me?”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but it’s only available through digital download. I can’t get a physical copy because no physical copies exist.”

Customer: “Okay, but if you order it they’ll send it out, right? I’ve ordered books here before.”

This went on for a solid five minutes. I kept trying to explain that ebooks are ONLY digital and that, short of printing out the PDF, there was nothing I could do. She ended up leaving saying she would just look for it online.

I ordered a copy of “Bleak House” by Charles Dickens from a local bookstore because I wanted a certain edition. When it arrived, I went by to pick it up and had this conversation with the cashier.

Cashier: “Oh, I saw this book on the hold shelf. It’s big.”

Me: “Yeah, I needed this edition.”

Cashier: “Charles Dickens is the guy who wrote Moby Dick, right?”

Me: *Pauses* “No.”

Cashier: “Oh, I guess I’ve never heard of him.”

Me: “Everyone’s heard of Charles Dickens. Even if you’ve never read him, you’ve heard of some of his stuff.”

Cashier: “Really?”

Me: “Yeah, he wrote A Christmas Carol, Oliver Twist, A Tale of Two Cities…”

Cashier: “Ohhhhh… Did he also write The Count Of Monte Cristo?”

Me: “What?”

Cashier: “Well, that one’s big, too.”

Me: “Please stop. One, you’re embarrassing yourself, and two, you work in a bookstore; you need to educate yourself.”

I work at a bookstore. One day, a man walks up to me. 

Customer: “Hey, is it cool if I order pizza? I’m hooked on [Book].”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but there is no food allowed inside the bookstore.”

Customer: “But you have a coffee shop right next door!”

Me: “Yes, but they are not affiliated with us. You are welcome to purchase [Book] and go next door.”

Customer: “But I don’t want to spend any money on a book!”

I’m thinking, “But you were willing to spend money on pizza?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but the rules are set. No food inside the bookstore.”

I later spotted him talking to my manager, and she was speaking firmly to him. He pointed me out, and I overheard her say that I was right, there is no food allowed inside the store. I later heard from my coworker that he complained to corporate, who told him he was not to return unless he followed the store rules.

I’ve been told that I’m pretty; my hair is curly and red and I wear makeup and know a bit about how to wear clothes that flatter me. I’m craving some new reading material, so I go into a bookstore with the intent of finding a good fantasy. As soon as I arrive, the male clerk follows me with his eyes. I find the cookbook section, and, remembering that I still need a birthday present for my friend, I start looking through them, trying to find one that she’ll like. Someone taps on my shoulder. It’s the male clerk from before.

Clerk: “Can I help you find anything?” *Smiles*

Me: “Yeah, do you have any fantasy novels?”

His eyes go wide and he leads me to another part of the store… to books with titles like “Fifty Shades Of Grey” and “Broken Heart.”

Me: “Not these! I meant like vampires, werewolves, ghosts—”

Clerk: “Oh, really? I thought you meant this section. I mean, dressed the way you are.”

Me: “Excuse me? That’s really sexist.”

Clerk: “I’m not being sexist. I’m just saying, you’re really beautiful. I would like to go out with you.”

Me: “Wow. Um, no, sorry. I have to go.”

Then, I realize that he’s cornered me, and I can’t get around him without him being able to grab me. Then, a man comes out of a back room and I give him a pleading look. He walks up and taps the male clerk on the shoulder.

Man: “[Clerk], I need you to go shelve those Stephen Kings.”

Clerk: “Hang on, I’m helping this girl.”

Man: “Do it, now.”

Thankfully, the male clerk goes to the back. 

Me: “Are you the manager?”

Man: “Yes. Was he bothering you?”

I told him what had happened, and he shook his head and promised to write him up for harassment. I put the cookbook back and haven’t gone into that shop again. Now I buy all my books online.

We have an arrogant regular customer who has just crossed the line and become abusive.

Me: “You need to leave now, and not come back.”

A few weeks later, he walks back into the shop as if he owns it.

Me: “Uh… you’re banned!”

Customer: “I’m sorry if you were offended, but I’m still willing to do business with you!”

Me: “But we’re not willing to do business with you!”

The arrogance!