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For The First Time In Forever, There Is A Good Frozen Joke

| NH, USA | Musical Mayhem, Popular

(It is the end of a Sunday shift at the bookstore, and a younger couple come up with their daughter. I tend to look very serious and deadpan, especially as I dress very formally for being just out of my teens, with a tie and waistcoat being very common. The customer places a book of ‘Frozen’ piano music that had been heavily discounted on the counter.)

Customer: “[Daughter] is going to love this. She’s needed more music.”

Customer’s Husband: “Yeah, but not looking forward to hearing Let it Go over and over.”

Customer: “I wonder why it’s so cheap, though.”

Me: *as I hand them the receipt* “Bribes from noise-canceling headphone companies.”

(They both looked surprised for a second, then started laughing as they walked out, telling me to have a good day.)

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Playing The Race Book

| Iowa City, IA, USA | Books & Reading, Crazy Requests, Popular

Customer: “I’m looking for a book. I can’t remember the title or author, but it’s by an Asian woman.”

Me: “Do you have any more information? Unfortunately our books aren’t organized by the author’s race.”

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Trying To Get You Fired

| Calgary, AB, Canada | Crazy Requests, Popular

(Our store is in one of the bigger malls in the city, and we don’t open until 10 am. At 8:25, as I’m getting the store ready to open and working on our before open tasks, the fire alarm goes off. It is NOT a drill, and everyone is being asked urgently to leave. As I’m locking the doors so that I can evacuate, a lady approaches me.)

Lady: “Hey! Can you let me in quick? I just need one thing.”

Me: “…Seriously? You do hear the fire alarm going off, right?”

Lady: “Yes, but I drove all the way here, and I really do just need this one thing.”

Me: “Listen, that fire alarm is not a drill. And I am not walking back into a store full of tinder so you can buy your one thing.”

Lady: “Well, I never! I should be allowed to get this one thing.”

Me: *turn to leave* “No.”

Lady: *as I’m leaving, starts to scream profanities at me*

(Best part? She had to be forcibly removed from the mall by authorities, and I got to watch her in the parking lot screaming at the firemen and police who removed her from the burning building.)

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