(I have a caller named Victor Krumm in the computer system. I’m a Harry Potter fan.)
Me: “Okay, sir, so you’re Victor Krumm?”
Caller: “Yep, that’s me.”
Me: “Sorry, this might sound funny, but did you know that there’s a book series called Harry Potter with a character with that name?”
(There’s a pause, as if he’s thinking, and suddenly he yells.)
Caller: “THE MUGGLES KNOW!”
(He hangs up. His wife calls a little while later to actually schedule.)
Me: “How can I help you?”
Caller: “This a bookstore?”
Me: “Yes, this is a bookstore.”
Caller: “Oh. I need the eighth Harry Potter book.”
Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but there are only seven Harry Potter books.”
Caller: “But I need the eighth one.”
Me: “There are only seven books, sir.”
Caller: “Why?”
Me: “Because there are only seven years at Hogwarts.”
Caller: “What does that mean?”
Me: “Sir, have you read the Harry Potter books?”
Caller: “No, my son reads them and he finished the seventh one and asked me to get the eighth one.”
Me: “Sir, if he read the seventh one, he would know that that was the final book in the series.”
Caller: “But he wants to read it. What can I do?”
Me: “Contact the author?”
Caller: “Do you have his number?”
Me: “Do I have J.K. Rowling’s number?”
Caller: “Yes.”
Me: “No. I… uh… don’t happen to have that on me.”
Caller: “Oh. Can you tell my son that there are only seven?”
Me: “No, I’m sure you’re quite capable of doing that all on your own.”
Caller: “He will be very upset!” *hangs up*
(I find a young customer looking a little lost in the nature section.)
Me: “Can I help you?”
Customer: “Yeah, I’m looking for a book about killing birds.”
Me: “Killing birds?”
Customer: “Yeah, I need it for school.”
Me: “Do you mean To Kill a Mockingbird, by any chance?”
Customer: “Yeah, that’s it! Do you have it?”
(I take him to the classics section and show him the book.)
Me: “You know, it’s not actually about killing birds.”
Customer: “What?”
Me: “It’s about social injustice in 1930s America.”
Customer: “Oh. That doesn’t sound as much fun. Do you have any books about killing birds?”
Me: “I hope not.”
This story is part of the “What Are They Teaching In School These Days?!” roundup!
Read the next “What Are They Teaching In School These Days?!” roundup story!
Read the “What Are They Teaching In School These Days?!” roundup!
Customer: “Do you carry books by Shakespeare here?”
Me: “Yes, we do. Which play did you need?”
Customer: “The one that sophomores read.” *gestures to the teenager next to her, presumably her daughter*
Me: “I’m sorry, but there’s not just one play that sophomores read. Do you happen to know the title, or maybe what it’s about?”
Customer: *loudly* “The-One-That-Sophomores-Read!”
Me: “Well, let’s walk over to the section and see if we can figure it out. A lot of early high school students read A Midsummer Night’s Dream or Romeo & Juliet.”
Daughter: “I think Romeo & Juliet.”
Me: “Great!” *pulls out a copy to hand to her*
Daughter: “I don’t know though.”
Me: “Okay. Well, could it be Hamlet, maybe? Or Julius Caesar?”
Daughter: “Julius Caesar? Isn’t that the sequel to Romeo & Juliet?”
This story is part of the Shakespeare roundup!
Read the next Shakespeare roundup story!
Read the Shakespeare roundup!
(A teenage girl enters the library.)
Me: “Hi, do you need help?”
Customer: “Oh, yeah, I’m looking for a book.”
Me: “Okay. Are you a member of this library or any other Wellington library?”
Customer: “Oh, no. I’m here with my mother for the US summer ’cause I live with Dad in Florida.”
Me: “We can sign you up to the library for free and issue you a card. The card will cost two dollars.”
Customer: “Okay.”
Me: “So, what book were you looking for?”
Customer: “Twilight. Have you heard of it? Most people in America have read it, but I’m not sure if it’s here.”
Me: “Oh, yeah. It was quite big for a while. My sister loved it.”
Customer: “It’s my second favorite book ever, after Eclipse.”
Me: “Oh, did you leave your copy in America?”
Customer: “No, I just wanted a copy from here because everyone here has really funny accents and I wanted to know how that would change the story.”
This story is part of our Libraries Roundup! This is the last story in the roundup, but we have plenty of others you might enjoy!
23 Crazy Stories About Customers Who Struggle With Reading And Comprehension
Read the next Libraries Roundup story!
Read the Libraries Roundup!
