(An older lady comes into the store. She doesn’t know me, yet decides to make me intimately knowledgeable about her husband’s surgery. She eventually runs out of steam when I don’t respond and looks around at the books on the shelves.)

Lady: “I like books.”

Me: “Good! Anything you’re looking for?”

Lady: *ignores my question* “I saw on TV that books are good to have because they make your house look nice.”

Me: *barely stifling a smile* “Really? I heard they’re also good to read.”

(Evidently, my comment goes right over her head.)

Lady: “And you can use them to prop up the bed.”

(Her husband buys books and then swiftly escorts her out.)

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Bookstore Customer: “Do people donate all these books to you?”

Me: “Yes. We show up for work every morning and there are boxes of valuable books sitting at the front door.”

Bookstore Customer: “Wow, really! I could open a book store?”

Me: “Sure!”

Bookstore Customer: “If I opened a store, how would people know where to leave the books?”