Putting Complaining Into Overtime

, , , , , , | Right | November 30, 2017

(At 6:45 pm the store starts to close. We make announcements to alert customers that the store will be closing in 15, then ten, and then five minutes time. At 6:45, we close the fitting rooms to stop customers from hiding or spending too long trying on clothes when the store closes at 7:00. I am doing the closing announcements when an irate customer storms up to the customer service desk. It is currently 6:55 pm, and we only have supervisors on the floor due to the late hour and to the fact our floor is small and understaffed.)

Customer: “I want to make a complaint! One of your staff was rude!”

Coworker: “Would you like to speak to a manager?”

Customer: “NO! I don’t want to talk to someone; I want to write this down. Give me an address I can write a complaint to. An email address!”

Coworker: “I can give you the head office’s address if you want.” *starts to search for the information*

Me: *indicates where to find the information, which lacks an email*

Coworker: “If you write to this address, you can make your complaint.”

Customer: “No, I don’t want to write a complaint; I want to send an email. Give me an email.”

Me: “We don’t have an email for head office; we could give you a manager’s email for this store, if you want?”

(My coworker and I then try to contact a supervisor to find out if we’re able to provide the manager’s email. In the midst of doing, this the customer changes their mind again!)

Customer: “No, I don’t want to write anything; let me talk to a manager right now!”

Coworker: “Er, yes, I can get you a manager; wait a moment.”

(They then call over a supervisor to locate an absent manager. I call the 7:00 pm closing announcement, and the manager still has not been found. We make an announcement asking for a manager to contact our floor but are still left waiting.)

Supervisor: “There isn’t a manager available right now; is this something we can resolve ourselves?”

Customer: “Yes, I don’t know. Your staff downstairs was very rude! I wanted to try on one top but she wouldn’t let me in the fitting room. I didn’t see her name.”

Coworker: “That’s okay; we can work out who it was by the shift roster if you like. I’m sorry that this has happened. We’ll just wait for the manager to take details.”

Customer: “I’ve never been spoken to so rudely before! I want to make a complaint.”

Supervisor: *comes over to try and help* “Do you need to speak to a manager? I can probably help.”

Customer: “Yes, it was the girl on the fitting rooms! I want to make a complaint.”

(Finally the store assistant manager turns up. It’s now 7:10 pm and the security guard is waiting to escort the last customer out so he can go home.)

Manager: “Yes, how can I help?”

Customer: “I want to complain about one of your staff!”

Manager: “All right, then, what happened?”

Customer: “Oh, I don’t want to get anyone in trouble.”

(They then left without taking any offered information or resolving the fuss they had made for the last 25 minutes!)

Pre-Show Entertainment

, , , , | Right | November 30, 2017

(At our theater, the online ordering part of our ticketing software includes a “Comments” section on each order. Most people leave the field blank, but some include relevant questions or complaints. Recently, someone left this comment on their order:)

Comment: “When I come for the tickets, offer a fist bump. I will then say, ‘Paper covers rock,’ and put my hand over your fist. You’ll know it’s me.”

(I’m a somewhat socially awkward person who benefits from the rules and boundaries of customer service, so I find this both hilarious and a little terrifying. I tell a much more extroverted coworker she has to do it. She is delighted.)

Coworker: “Are you picking up tickets?”

Customer: “Yes, they’re under [Customer].”

Coworker: *gleefully whispers* “This is my moment!” *hands over tickets, offers fist*

Customer: *puts his hand over hers* “Paper covers rock.”

Coworker: “Woo!”

(The customer’s party cracks up.)

Me: “Well done.”

Leave Your Trash (TV) On Our Desk

, , , , , | Right | November 30, 2017

(I am down in the laundry room getting towels when a guest is getting checked in, so I have no interaction with him. When I get back, I notice he has left his payment card at the desk, so I walk around to the back to give it back to him.)

Me: “Are you [Guest]?”

Guest: “Uh… Yes?”

Me: *hands him his card*

Guest: “OH! Oh, thank God! THANK GOD! HAHAHA!”

Me: “Haha, yeah, bad thing to leave behind.”

Guest: “HA! Oh, man! Thank God! I thought you were with Cheaters! Oh, thank God! “

Me: “…”

HIPSTER WATCH!

, , , , , | Right | November 30, 2017

Customer: “How old are you?”

Me: “Sorry?”

Customer: “How old are you? You couldn’t be more than 25.”

Me: “I’m 22; why?”

Customer: “If you are 22, then why are you wearing a watch?”

Me: “Because I like my watch.”

Customer: *rolls his eyes* “Oh, are you one of those stupid hipsters who thinks you’re too good to look at your phone, or something? Seriously, they shouldn’t hire hipsters.”

Me: “Sir, I wear this watch because it was given to me by somebody I care about. I don’t see how wearing a watch is an issue.”

Customer: “I’m sick of hipsters thinking they’re better than everybody else. If you’re not a hipster, then tell people.”

(After customer leaves.)

Customer #2: “Did you really just get in trouble for wearing a watch?”

Me: “I think so.”

Customer #2: “I wonder what he would say if he saw my brother’s pocket watch.”

Their Leaving Is A Blessing

, , , , , | Right | November 29, 2017

(I’m showing one of my rental properties to a prospective tenant. She has looked over the apartment and everything seems to be going well. After I give her the run-down on the lease terms and whatnot, she suddenly turns.)

Prospective Tenant: “And have you had this place blessed for good fortune?”

Me: “Um, well, not really. Any religious ceremony you’d want to conduct for yourself is okay, so long as it is within the rules of the building. Bringing a religious priest, pastor, or elder in for a blessing would be fine, but things like burning incense or sage would be problematic since they might disturb the other residents of the building with the smell.”

Prospective Tenant: “Oh, no, I don’t believe in any of that voodoo stuff. I was just curious if you had a priest bless this place for your good fortune.”

Me: “I’m not particularly religious myself, so if this place has been ‘blessed,’ it was only by the occupants. Again, if you want to do a blessing, that’s fine, so long as it isn’t disruptive to other residents in some way.”

Prospective Tenant: “Well, that’s not ideal, but I suppose I can arrange for a pastor from my church to come bless this place and talk to you about accepting Jesus.”

(At that moment, she’s walking out the door to the apartment and spots the mezuzah my current tenants have hung at the door.)

Prospective Tenant: “AND WHAT IS THAT?”

Me: “I’m not entirely sure of its meaning, but as far as I understand, it’s a custom for Jewish people to hang that near the door. Don’t worry; they will remove it and patch the small holes from hanging it when they leave. They asked about hanging it, and since it’s no different, damage-wise, than a picture or whatnot, I said it was fine. Again, the holes will be patched and painted before you move in.”

Prospective Tenant: “I can’t walk under that mark of the devil! Take it off the wall! NOW!”

Me: “Um, you walked under it to come in the door, and it’s a simple piece of wood. If you don’t believe in its ‘power,’ walking past it shouldn’t do any harm. I am not going to yank that off the wall without proper tools, as I’d likely do a lot of damage to the wall trying to do so. So, let me see you out…”

Prospective Tenant: “NO! I am not going to knowingly pass through a door marked by the devil. I didn’t know when I walked in, but now I know, and I can’t walk through that door until you remove it!”

(Long story short, after I continued to refuse to pull it off the wall without any tools, she called her pastor and he told her it was okay to exit so long as she prayed to Jesus while she was “passing under that unholy mark.” Needless to say, her application wasn’t approved.)

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