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April Showers Bring Confused Flowers

, , , , , | Right | CREDIT: Rina-yah | October 2, 2021

In the middle of each month, we get bombarded with calls from people whose phone plans have been suspended for not paying them.

Customer: “I want to know why my phone is not working. I just paid my bills!”

Me: “One second, please; let me look into that for you.”

I look up his account.

Me: “Thank you for your patience. I see that your payment has arrived; however, that was for the bill due in January. Unfortunately, since your bill from February hasn’t been paid yet, your phone plan has been suspended.”

Customer: “But I just paid those bills. This is ridiculous.”

Me: “Yes, I see right here that you just paid a bill; however, you still have one that’s overdue by almost two months already.”

Customer: “Two months? It was due in February!”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “How is that two months? It’s March!”

Me: “Sir, it’s the twelfth of April.”

Customer: “Oh… You’re right.”

After that, he was actually pretty nice, and we had a pleasant conversation. I even exempted him from the reactivation charges as he seemed genuinely sorry and I could sympathise with being so lost in time.

That Sounds… Reasonable?

, , , | Right | CREDIT: Rude-Mode-3137 | October 2, 2021

Caller: “Why is your company taking money out of my account every month?”

Me: “So, you don’t have a policy with us, but you are being charged every month. And you’d like the charges to stop?”

Caller: “That’s right! I don’t have a policy with you, so stop charging me!” *Pauses* “At least, I don’t think I have a policy with you. If I do have a policy with you, and you’re charging me, then that’s fine. But if I don’t have a policy and you’re charging me, well, I’m just not okay with that!”

Are You Sure You Were Calling The Right Number?

, , , | Right | September 20, 2021

I work for a software company in the billing department. I am the only person that manages the billing for all of our customers. If someone has a billing problem, it comes to me and no one else. My phone rings and I answer it.

Customer: “I need to switch my payment method on file. I tried to update the card with your support team because no one in billing ever answers my phone calls. In fact, I’m surprised I got you on the phone because no one ever answers in billing.”

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that, ma’am. Our support team is unable to update payment methods, but I am happy to help today! Can you please confirm the last four numbers of the card you would like to use for your monthly billing?”

Customer: “It’s the [card] ending in [number].” 

Me: “All right, ma’am, I’ve got that updated for you! Is there anything else I can do for you?

Customer: “No, that’s all, thank you. I’m just surprised someone in billing actually answered. You never answer.” *Hangs up*

I looked up her account after. The last time she called billing was two years ago. I answered.

Doesn’t Understand The Custom Part Of Customer, Part 23

, , , | Right | September 10, 2021

I have recently started work as a customer service agent on the phone lines for a major cleaning chemical company. This call takes place in mid-January and is by no means rare, but this customer is more honest than most.

I introduce myself and verify that I have the correct account on my screen.

Customer: “I have a question about my invoices.”

Me: “Certainly! I have them pulled up here. What is your question?”

Customer: “I received a late notice in the mail saying I have invoices from May and June of last year. How is that possible?!”

Me: “Oh! Do you have proof from your bank statement that a payment for these invoices was taken out?”

Customer: “No. I didn’t write any checks for those months.”

Me: “So… would you like to make a payment now over the phone?”

Customer: “No, I’ll wait until Monday.”

And then they hung up. I do not know how they expected invoices to be paid when they did not, in fact, pay them.

Doesn’t Understand The Custom Part Of Customer, Part 22
Doesn’t Understand The Custom Part Of Customer, Part 21
Doesn’t Understand The Custom Part Of Customer, Part 20
Doesn’t Understand The Custom Part Of Customer, Part 19
Doesn’t Understand The Custom Part Of Customer, Part 18

Email Fail, Part 34

, , , | Right | September 7, 2021

Caller: “I got a past due notice sent in the mail that I want to take care of.”

Me: “Certainly, I can help with that.”

After I get the invoice information…

Caller: “I just don’t understand how this is past due! Why didn’t y’all try to get in contact with me? This had better not affect my credit score!”

On my screen, I can see every email we’ve sent to the customer in the two months since he placed his order.

Me: “No, it won’t affect your credit score. We did try to email you… six times, it looks like. Did you receive them? Is your email [Caller] at [Website]?

Caller: “Yes, I saw those emails and deleted them. I figured those stupid-looking emails weren’t real. I figured if you needed payment, you’d get a hold of me.”

Yes, that’s what the emails were for. And before anyone asks, the body of the emails simply read: “Your credit card declined on [order number]. Please give us a call at [company phone number] to provide a new payment method.” So spammy.

Email Fail, Part 33
Email Fail, Part 32
Email Fail, Part 31
Email Fail, Part 30
Email Fail, Part 29