I am a wedding photographer. At the time of this story, I was relatively new to the industry, and I would get bookings based on the quality of my portfolio but not the quantity. Therefore, I would accept half my fee as a deposit, and I would ask for the other half when I was ready to send over the final photos.

Me: “Hi, [Client]! I’m happy to say that I’ve finished touching up your photos, and they’re ready for you whenever you are!”

Client: “Oh, wow, that was fast! Please send me the link!”

Me: “I would be happy to. I just need to settle the other half of my fee, first.”

Client: “Oh, yes, I’ll get that over to you soon.”

Since I was early, I didn’t think much of it. However, a few days past the original delivery date:

Client: “You promised me the photos were ready early! But I still don’t have them!”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry if there was a miscommunication. Yes, the photos have been ready for almost a week! I just need to settle the bill, and I can send them straight away!”

Client: “I can pay you at the end of the month.”

Me: “That’s fine.”

Annoying, but fine. The next day:

Client: “I still haven’t got the photos!”

Me: “Yes, because you said you would pay at the end of the month.”

Client: “You mean you won’t send them until I’ve sent you the money?!”

Me: “That’s usually how it works, yes.”

The client hung up on me. At the end of the month, I sent them a reminder email, and I sent another one the week after that. No response. I figured maybe they were going through some post-wedding budgeting issues, and they would get back to me when they could. I had plenty of other projects to keep me occupied anyway.

Three whole months later, I received a very angry call from an older woman. I recognize her as the mother of the bride.

Mother Of The Bride: “You absolute monster! You’re holding my daughter’s wedding photos ransom so you can get more money from her?! You send over every photo right this instant, or I am taking you to court!”

Me: “I think there’s been a misunderstanding. Your daughter hasn’t paid me yet, which is why I haven’t sent the photos. I’m not holding any photos ransom!”

Mother Of The Bride: “That’s a lie! I paid you [amount] myself months before the wedding!”

Me: “That was a deposit, ma’am — 50%. I am owed the other 50% before I can send the photos.”

Mother Of The Bride: “You’re just making things up to get more money!”

Me: “If you check the contract that your daughter signed, you’ll see it’s quite clearly written there that my services are [full amount], with half paid before and the rest upon delivery.”

Mother Of The Bride: “Well… even if that’s true, that’s a ridiculous amount of money to charge for a few photos!”

Me: “I actually come in cheaper than the competition, ma’am.”

She hung up, and I didn’t hear back again so I assumed she had checked the contract and discovered I was right, and she was now figuring out what to do.

Amazingly, another three months went by, and I received yet another call, this time from the bride again.

Client: “How dare you?! You’re stealing my photos!”

Me: “Are we really going to go through this again?”

Client: “I can see my photos on your website! You have no right to use them! Take them down now!”

Me: “Oh, you mean my online portfolio. Yes, well, since you didn’t pay for them, I own them until you do. The pictures at your wedding came out so lovely that I had to use them on my site. They’ve helped me drum up quite a bit of business!”

For clarity, none of the pictures showed the faces of the client or her guests. I’d put up some candids of shoes, the cake, her dress, and a few other non-identifying features.

Client: “You’re profiting off of my photos!”

Me: “Yes, just like I was originally supposed to!”

A year after the wedding, the groom finally paid. He had no idea what was happening, but when he asked where the wedding photos were, he heard the long, drawn-out story. He was incredibly apologetic on the phone.

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A few years back, our electricity supplier at work stopped sending us regular bills for some reason. I knew the cost was always about £1,000 a month, so just tracked it in the accounts and waited for a bill.

Six months later, just before I would have begun harassing them as I knew our contract was going to expire soon and probably be moved to someone else, a bill arrived.

It was for £62,000.00.

I’ve just had a look back at my email records, and I have fifty-five emails regarding the discussion that followed over the next six months. I dread to think how long I spent on the phone.

They promised not to take the direct debit from our accounts, but then they did.

They claimed they couldn’t stop the direct debit in time and that they understood why we reclaimed it. They then applied late fees and threatened to take us to court.

They promised to send engineers to check the meter, but they never did.

They promised so many return phone calls. None happened.

They promised that this would have no impact on our impending supplier switch. Then, they blocked it.

Eventually, I reached a stage where I clearly hit the “stall and refuse to help” level of their customer service. The person on the phone would do nothing and claimed they could do nothing, but there was no one else for me to speak to at a higher level.

So, I contacted the Ombudsman. Only then, once they were under official investigation, did they accept that, yes, they had “misinterpreted” the meter readings and reduce the charge to £4,700.

Of course, they then tried to vastly overcharge us for the period of time we were out of contract because they hadn’t let us change, with another overinflated meter reading and more than double the price per unit.

That led to me going back to the Ombudsman before the first complaint was even finished.

We never did get the apology letter promised by [Electricity Supplier] as part of their settlement with the Ombudsman. They did give us the £50 goodwill credit, though!

My town’s water and sewer company offered $5 off per month if I signed up for e-billing instead of sending a paper copy. A few months after that, they rolled out paying online, as well. I logged in and tried to pay my first bill. 

Bill amount: $150

E-billing discount: -$5

Online Payment Processing Fee: $8

Total: $153

What? I canceled the payment and wrote a check like I had every month before. A few days later, I got a call from the company. 

Representative: “Hi, this is [Company]. We received your check for your electricity usage this month. We were just calling to let you know you can pay online and save the stamp, and the amount is automatically deducted from your bank account.”

Me: “Yes, but—”

Representative: “You’re actually saving $5 per month by not getting a paper bill. Saving money is great, right?”

Me: “But I’m being charged an $8 processing fee for paying online. So it would actually cost me more to pay online than to send a check.”

Representative: “Well… you could look at it that way. But you’re already saving paper and lessening the USPS load by not having a physical bill mailed to you.”

Me: “I know. Actually, where is your office?”

Representative: “[Address].”

Me: “Do you accept payments in person?”

Representative: “…yes.”

Me: “Wonderful! I won’t be mailing my check, then. I’ll just stop by. Thank you!”

Representative: “No, but—”

I hung up.

The next day, I saw my neighbor and told him what I was doing. He is elderly and doesn’t use the Internet much so I showed him how to set up an account using my phone. He handed me a check for his bill, minus the $5 for enrolling in paperless billing. I went to my other neighbors and friends in town and explained what I was doing. Many people didn’t even realize they were being charged extra for processing and handed me their sealed envelopes with the checks and bills right on the spot.

That Friday, I walked into the office with quite a few payments. The representative was sitting at the desk. 

Me: “Hi there.”

I handed him the stack.

Representative: “What is this?”

Me: “Oh, my neighbors gave me their bills to bring in. One trip, one person, and everyone saves money.”

Representative: “You can pay online.”

Me: “Oh, I know, but this saves us all the processing fee. Saving money is great, right?”

Representative: *With an attitude* “I have to process all of these before you can leave.”

Me: “No problem. I’ll wait.”

I sat down and waited. He rolled his eyes and got to it. Less than half an hour later, he had a stack of receipts for me. 

Representative: “You can go now.”

Me: “Thank you!”

I returned the receipts to the appropriate people. The next month, I collected even more bills. By the third month, I had over fifty bills to hand in. The representative looked like he was going to start foaming at the mouth.

Representative: “This is ridiculous.” *Louder* “I need a supervisor over here!”

Supervisor: “What’s going on?”

Representative: “She keeps bringing everyone’s bills to avoid the processing fee.”

Supervisor: “Paying online is quick, easy, and convenient, ma’am.”

Me: *Shrugging* “But this is cheaper, and I already come this way.”

Supervisor: “Well, yes, but this is a lot of work.”

Me: “I’m not breaking any rules, am I?”

Supervisor: “No…” *Sigh* “Okay, [Representative], I’ll help you.”

I was there for nearly two hours waiting for all of the payments to be processed. The week before the next bill was due (which happened to be December), I received an email. 

Email: “Merry Christmas, [Town] residents! As our gift to you, we have decided to waive the processing fee for all bills paid online for the next year. Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Sincerely, [Supervisor].”

It’s been several years, and the processing fee still has not come back. I do feel bad for the representative who had to do all the paperwork, but I helped my neighbors save money and got a ridiculous fee revoked!

I had a dental procedure done recently. My insurance covered half, and I paid the other half. A month later, I received a bill from the dentist for the full amount. I called them to figure out what was going on.

Me: “Hi, this is [My Name]. I’m calling about a bill I just received.”

Receptionist: “Birth date?”

Me: “[Date].”

Receptionist: “Address?”

Me: “[Address].”

Receptionist: “Name?”

Me: “…[My Name].”

Receptionist: “One moment.”

Five minutes of smooth jazz hold music later, she was back. 

Receptionist: “That bill is for your procedure done last month.”

Me: “Right, but I don’t understand why I’m being billed. I already—”

Receptionist: *Rudely* “Because we don’t provide free services. You—”

Me: “I already paid. I have the receipt for my half in my hand, and I have the statement from my insurance company saying it was paid off.”

Receptionist: “It can take up to sixty days for our system to acknowledge that insurance has been approved.”

Me: “Okay, but why are you billing me for the whole amount?”

Receptionist: “Insurance pays half, you pay half.”

Me: “I already paid my half, and that doesn’t explain why you want me to pay the whole bill.”

Receptionist: *Sigh* “I don’t know how else to explain this to you, honestly.”

Me: “Then get me someone else, because this is ridiculous.”

She put me back on hold for twenty minutes, probably either hoping I’d hang up, waiting for someone to be available to take my call, or looking for something to explain how I owed 100% of the bill.

Eventually, the office manager picked up. 

Office Manager: “Hi, this is [Office Manager]. I hear you have a question about your bill?”

Me: “Yes. I already paid my half, and I have a statement from my insurance saying they paid their half. Why do I have a bill for the full amount?”

Office Manager: *Confused* “You shouldn’t. Let me see.” *Typing* “Can you confirm a few details for me?”

Me: “Yes.”

We went through all of my identifying information again, adding my insurance company and the date of my procedure.

Office Manager: “I see what happened. Somehow, your insurance information is incorrect. I have updated it, and you’re all good. You can throw that bill away.”

Me: *Relieved* “Thank you!”

I still don’t understand how they were able to properly bill my insurance and then say it was wrong in the system, but it worked out. When I went in for my follow-up, the receptionist was very cold toward me. I suspect she had something to do with the mixup.

I am the author of this story, and I’ve had another stunning interaction with our telco.

It’s September, and the new iPhone is about to be released, so many retailers are having a fire sale on the older models. My mother decided it was time to upgrade her dinosaur to a now-obsolete iPhone 14. I convinced her to add it to her bill so she could pay it off monthly.

[Provider] also has a price-match policy, and that day, another retailer was advertising the same device for $200 cheaper. I’m authorised on my mother’s account, so I offered to call to set it up.

Consultant: “The account will need to be set up as direct debit/autopay to add the new phone.”

Me: “Is that necessary? I didn’t need to last time. And as a pensioner, Mum isn’t overly happy using direct debit.”

She placed me on hold, checked, and came back.

Consultant: “Your mother’s current plan is eligible, so direct debit won’t be necessary. And as a bonus, she will keep her pensioner discount!”

The order proceeded, and we finished the call. (Those familiar with the provider know they switched to direct debit a while ago and there is no other option, but we weren’t told that.)

Two weeks later, I asked my mum if her phone had arrived yet as I needed to set it up for her. It hadn’t, so I contacted [Provider]. They came back and advised me that the order had been cancelled because a direct debit agreement had not been set up — and nobody had contacted us to advise this before it was cancelled.

After trying to discuss it with a supervisor, I asked to lodge a complaint. (It’s worked twice before now, so why not?) The consultant took down the details and read it back as, “Customer not happy with direct debit”. I corrected him to ensure that it wasn’t just the direct debit but also the fact that nobody had contacted us to advise what the problem was, and we’d had to chase it up.

Twenty-four hours later my mother received an email.

Email: “Dear Customer: Regarding complaint [number], we are sorry you aren’t happy with our payment options. However, as direct debit is the only option we offer, we are not able to resolve your complaint to your satisfaction and consider the matter finalised.”

I saw red. I went straight to the ombudsman and explained what we had been through. The call took five minutes, and they promised we’d receive a callback shortly.

The next day, the [Provider] Ombudsman Complaints officer called back and clarified the details of our issue. I primarily explained that had someone called and said, “You need to do direct debit to get this deal,” we’d have done so.

The officer understood, apologised, and went to see what she could do.

Officer: “Unfortunately, the iPhone 14 is now completely unavailable. I cannot offer you the same deal.”

Me: “Surely, since this was not our mistake, there is something you can do to make it right?”

After much discussion that I’ll skip here, the offer was an iPhone 15, for the price of the 14.

Me: “But what about the price-match deal? We have screenshots of [Other Retailer]’s price on the day we took out the deal.”

The next offer was the iPhone 15 for the price of the 14, plus $200. But we’d lose the pensioner discount.

Me: “But we were told on the first call that we would still get the pensioner discount?”

The next offer included the discount, with thirty-six months credit, as well. 

So, after all is said and done, my mother pays an extra $5 per month than she would have had everything gone through the first time, but she also received over $500 off a brand-new iPhone.

Moral of the story: all of our telcos are bad in Australia, but if you know the system and insist on your rights as a consumer — and wave an ombudsman stick if they don’t fix the problem — you will generally make out pretty good.

Related:
Isn’t It Literally Your Job To “Figure It Out”?