Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

Playing Unfair With The Fairer Sex

, , , , , | Right | February 8, 2009

(I provide Internet support over the phone. I am the only qualified technician working today. I also happen to be female.)

Me: “Welcome to [Company] Internet support. My name is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Oh, hello, sweetheart. I didn’t realize I’d reached the reception. Would you please connect me to Internet support?”

Me: “This is Internet support. What can I do for you?”

Customer: “I want help with a technical problem. I can’t talk to you. I want to talk to a man!”

Me: “Sir, I can assure you that I’ll be able to help you with your technical problem. I am the qualified technician here today.”

Customer: “You are a girl! You have no clue how to help me! This is man stuff. I demand to speak with a man!”

(This continues for ten minutes. The customer gets more and more aggravated and starts yelling nasty comments. I give up, and connect him to my coworker, who sits next to me. My coworker is male.)

Coworker: “Welcome to [Company] Internet support. My name is [Coworker]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Finally, a man! My Internet is so unstable these days; I can’t seem to stay on it! It takes forever to load and the speed is horrible!”

Coworker: “Sir, I see the problem, and I’m sending a report. It will be fixed on Monday.”

Customer: “What?! It’s Saturday! Why do you have to wait until Monday? I want it fixed now!”

Coworker: “Well, we would need a qualified technician to log into the system to fix your line. It’s Saturday, so there is only one qualified technician working.”

Customer: “Get him to fix it now! I demand to speak with him!”

Coworker: “Sir, you have already spoken to her.”

Customer: “Wait. Her?”

Coworker: “Yes. You spoke to our only qualified technician earlier today. You yelled profanities at her, and demanded to speak to a man.”

Customer: “So, I’ll be lucky if my Internet is up again on Monday?”

Coworker: “You’ll be lucky if you have Internet at all.”

With Thought, Care And Testosterone

, , , | Right | February 6, 2009

Female Conference Attendee: “Where’s the cook? This food is amazing, and I want to give my regards to the cook.”

Me: “That’s great to hear; if you wait a moment, I’ll get him out of the back.”

(I return with the cook.)

Me: “This is [Cook], and he is our head cook.”

Female Conference Attendee: *looking behind the head cook* “No, seriously, where’s the cook? I need to talk with her.”

Cook: “Ma’am, I am the cook. How can I help you?”

Female Conference Attendee: *looking askance* “You are NOT the cook. You cannot BE the cook. The food here is so wonderful, so full of love it MUST be cooked by a woman.”

Cook: “All right, you caught us. The real cook has her day off today. We’ll thank her when she gets back tomorrow.”

Female Conference Attendee: “Yes, you will.” *muttering as she walks away* “Men who cook… sheesh.”

Gestapo, Taco, Same Difference

, , | Right | January 27, 2009

(I work in a retail store that sells kind of quirky and alternative items. As it is nearing Christmas, I am doing the gift-wrapping while a coworker is ringing up items.)

Lady: *hands me a mug*

Me: *begins gift-wrapping the mug* “Nothing to it. Just like wrapping a tortilla!

Lady: “What would you know about tortillas? You’re blonde!”

Me: “Well, my mother loves–”

Lady: “Shut up! You blondes think you’re so much better than everyone else! You’re not! You need everyone else to do all the work for you! You’re all useless, and you’ll never be the master race!”

Me: “Erm…”

Lady: *pays and storms out*


This story is part of the Christmas Day roundup!

Read the next Christmas Day roundup story!

Read the Christmas Day roundup!

The Trouble With Seeing In Black And White

, , , | Right | November 3, 2008

Caller: “I need to exchange this movie. It’s the wrong one.”

Me: “Which movie were you looking for?”

Caller:Big Momma’s House.”

Me: “Um, what does it say on the case?”

Caller:Big Momma’s House.”

Me: “What does it say on the video cassette itself?”

Caller:Big Momma’s House.”

Me: “I’m thinking you have Big Momma’s House there, ma’am.”

Caller: “But…”

Me: “Yes?”

Caller: “But… there’s white people in it.”

Me: “There are a few of us about, ma’am. We do sneak into the odd movie here and there.”

Caller: *click*

My Hypocrisy Ate Your Democracy

, , , | Right | October 23, 2008

(This is before same-sex marriage had been legalized.)

Me: “Thank you for calling the Benefits Center. How may I assist you today?”

Customer: “Hi. I am trying to enroll in my benefits for next year.”

Me: “Okay, how may I assist you?”

Customer: “I just got engaged and I want to add my fiancé to my insurance.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but you won’t be able to add your fiancé to your coverage until you get married.”

Customer: “So… those f****** f****ts can get benefits, but I can’t?”

Me: “Yes, sir, but you have the option to get married; they don’t.”

Customer: “Those f****** f****ts, f****** us over anyway they can!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but you have the option to get married; they do not. That is the only reason we offer health benefits to same-sex domestic partners.”

Customer: “What if I can’t get married? What are you going to do about that?”

Me: “Why can’t you get married?”

Customer: “Well, a**hole if you must ask… it’s because I am already married.”

Me: “Sir, I can assure you we don’t pay for infidelity.”