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Incheon Further Away From The Answer

, , , , , , | Right | August 10, 2010

Resident: “So are you Chinese or Puerto Rican? It’s hard to tell.”

Me: “I’m Korean.”

Resident: “Oh. Is that like Japan?”

Me: “No, it’s Korea.”

Resident: “Well, that was my next guess. So, do you speak Chinese or Japanese?”


This story is part of our Foreign Languages roundup!

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Havana Clue What She’s Talking About

, , , | Right | July 27, 2010

(I have lived in the US for five years, but I still speak with a slight accent.)

Me: “Did you find everything all right?”

Customer: “Can someone else help me, please?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “I want someone who isn’t Mexican to help me. You already took enough jobs, thank you very much.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m not Mexican.”

Customer: “Yes! Yes, you are!” *reads my name tag* “Maria is such a Mexican name!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m Portuguese.”

Customer: “Oh, Mexico, Portugal, Costa Rica. It’s all the same. You come into our country and steal all of our jobs. Just because you’ve hopped the fence doesn’t give you the right to be here!”

Me: “Ma’am, Portugal is in Europe. It’s located next to Spain. We speak Portuguese there. It is impossible to hop across an ocean and into the US.”

Customer: “Go back to Castro then, communist!”


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Store Of The D***ed

, , , , , | Right | July 23, 2010

Me: “Hi, how can help you today?”

Customer: “Are you a lesbian!?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “You’ve got real short hair. I heard that women with short hair are lesbians.”

Me: “So, was there anything I could help you with?”

Customer: “You can answer my question! Are you a lesbian or not?!”

Me: “Sir, I don’t feel it’s appropriate for me to answer that.”

Customer: “I don’t want some Hell-bound homosexual near me! God will strike you down for disobeying his word!”

Me: “Okay, okay. If you really must know, no, I am not a lesbian.”

Customer: “Then why do you have short hair??”

(By this time, my manager, who is male-to-female transgender, walks over.)

Manager: *in their manly voice* “Is there a problem here, sir?”

Customer: “Oh, dear lord! You’re not a woman!”

Manager: “Only on paper, sir.

Customer: *runs out screaming* “This place is d***ed! D***ed, I tell you!”


This story is part of the Transgender-themed roundup!

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Large Signs, Larger Bags, And Even Larger Egos

, , , , , | Right | June 19, 2010

(A customer with a large bag enters the store.)

Me: “Excuse me, ma’am. You’re going to have to check your bag there up at the front counter.”

Customer: “Why?! I’ve never had to before!”

Me: “I’m sorry, it’s store policy.”

Customer: “No, it isn’t! You’re doing this just because I’m not white! I guess non-white people aren’t welcome here!”

Me: “You’re more than welcome here, but it’s store policy that all shoppers check their bags.”

Customer: “Show me a sign that says this is your policy!”

(I take her up front and show her the large, bright-red sign with bold, white letters that says customers are required to check their bags before shopping.)

Customer: “You put this out because you saw me coming!”


This story is part of the Customers-Ignoring-Signs roundup!  This is the last story in the roundup, but we have plenty of others you might enjoy!

11 Stories About Customers Who Absolutely Hate To Read

 

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Kosher Klash

, , , , | Right | May 25, 2010

Customer: “Could I have a hot dog?”

Me: “Sure, would you like any toppings?”

Customer: “Cheese, please.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but this is a Kosher deli and as per our religious belief, we cannot serve cheese with certain kinds of meat.”

Customer: “Well, I’m not Kosher, so I want cheese on my hot dog.”

Me: “Well, even if I was permitted to serve that, which I’m not, we do not have any cheese which would be suitable for melting onto the hot dog.”

Customer: “Well, fine, then I’ll take my business elsewhere! I’m not going to stand here and be discriminated against! You Kosher people should just go back to… Kosheria or wherever it is you come from!”

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