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Do You Know The Way To Monterrey?

, , , , , , | Working | January 19, 2022

I am Mexican, from Monterrey, and was studying in London. I had to fly back to Monterrey to my brother’s wedding, but I couldn’t change my ticket online, so I tried ringing the airline’s phone number. After being on hold for ages, I decided to go to the helpdesk in the Heathrow airport, instead.

Once there, I explained that I needed to change the date of my ticket. The guy checked my ticket and proceeded with the change. When he printed the new ticket, I noticed that the destination was Monterey, California, not Monterrey, Mexico.

Me: “Sorry, this ticket says Monterey, California, and I’m going to Monterrey, Mexico!”

Employee: *Very condescending* “My apologies. I must have gotten confused by your accent!”

Me: “Regardless of my accent, I gave you a printed ticket that says Monterrey, Mexico. You must have gotten confused because you can’t read well!”

The guy just corrected the error without saying a word.

Green Blankets Swaddle Better, Duh

, , , , , , | Related | January 17, 2022

My husband and I are expecting our second child. We are waiting until birth to find out baby’s sex. I’m thrifty and am trying to find some of the baby items we want secondhand. I find some really good deals and am sharing my excitement with my mother-in-law. 

Me: “I ended up finding someone just giving away the baby carrier I was looking for and two of the swaddles for under $10 total at a consignment store.”

Mother-In-Law: “Nice. Are they a gender-neutral color?”

Me: “The carrier’s an Oxford blue and the swaddles are a baby blue.”

She makes a tutting sound. 

Me: “What?”

Mother-In-Law: “What are you going to do if you have a girl?”

Me: “What do you mean? I’m going to use them.”

Mother-In-Law: “Blue is a boy’s color. You can’t use those if you have a girl.”

Me: “I don’t care if they were all pink and we had a boy. I’d still use them. The carrier was free and the swaddles were 85% off the cost they normally are. It’s just a color. Baby won’t care.”

Mother-In-Law: *Looking annoyed* “You need a gender-neutral color, instead.”

Me: “Tell you what. If we have a girl, you are more than welcome to spend the $150 dollars to buy everything in the color you deem fit.”

She dropped it after that and I stopped sharing information with her.

Pretty Much What Most History Books Are Doing These Days

, , , , , | Right | January 14, 2022

I’m designing a photographic history exhibit for a prestigious university. The project requires a series of panels that each depict a different decade, from the 1930s to the present.

Client: “You know, this is all great, but it could use a little more diversity. Right now, there are a lot of photos of all white men, and we don’t want to send the wrong message.”

Me: “Okay, that’s a reasonable request. I could pull some photos of your black student organizations and women’s center and add those to the panels showing the school’s more recent history.”

Client: “Actually, we’d love more diversity in the early panels too.”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Client: “Like this panel depicting the university in the 30s. All the photos are of white men!”

The school did not admit black students until the 1970s.

A Most Reasonable Reason For A Meltdown

, , , , , | Right | CREDIT: Ok-Fox-8931 | January 11, 2022

I am a hostess at a restaurant. The patio is open; it is a nice day. There is a family of five out there. A guy comes in on a mobility scooter and asks for the patio, and I seat him.

The server out there is bisexual, and it is Pride Month, so he has borrowed my bisexual flag bandana to wear. The next time I see him, he gives me back the bandana, kind of strangely.

Me: “Are you okay?”

Server: “Yeah…”

I give him the side-eye but let it go.

It’s been fifteen minutes, and every time my coworker comes in, he looks kind of upset. I get up to the hostess stand, and the mom from the family of five is standing there, PISSED. I brace myself mentally for an entitlement meltdown. Instead:

Mom: “I demand that you remove that man on a scooter! He’s been harassing our server for being bisexual. And when one of my kids told him to stop, he called my kid a ‘little s***’ and ‘probably a [slur], too’!”

We removed him and gave her family free dessert. Good on her, and shame on me for thinking the worst of her.

Plant Your Feet Firmly When You Stand Against Racism

, , | Right | January 10, 2022

I work at a farm/nursery. I am ringing up a lady who was buying a lot of flowers. She is white and looks like she just got off a cruise vacation; she has a tan/sunburn, huge sunglasses, and flip flops, and she is dripping with jewelry.

The lady spots my wonderful Cambodian coworker, who is wearing her giant sunhat to keep her hair and skin healthy as she works. The customer physically points at my friend.

Customer: Loudly “How can you employ one of those towel-head terrorists?! Don’t you know Muslim women will kill you in your sleep?! You should get rid of her immediately!”

I am shocked into silence for half a second.

Me: “Not that it’s any of your business, but [Friend] is Buddhist, not Muslim, and it doesn’t matter either way; she would be allowed to work here even if she was Muslim.”

I then speak in my meanest, scowliest possible manner.

Me: “You need to leave and never return.”

I took her cartful of plants and began putting them back. She stood there and sputtered for a while and then fled to the parking lot. We’ve had lots of idiot customers, but that’s the first and last time I’ve had to kick someone out.