Your Last (Corn) Meal

, | NJ, USA | Awesome Workers, Food & Drink

(A regular bar patron who would drink Irish coffee and run his yap is talking about French fries, when he spots me, the chef.)

Customer: “Do you put corn meal on your French fries?”

Me: “Uh… no.”

Customer: “F*** you!”

(He later died, and his repass was held in our banquet room. That day, we put corn meal on our French fries.)

At Lagerheads, Part 4

| Ireland | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

Customer: “I’d like a gin and tonic and a pint of Carlsberg.”

Me: “I’m sorry. We don’t have any Carlsberg. We have other lagers available on draft and also those available in long neck bottles.”

Customer: “Okay. So, I’ll have a long neck Carlsberg.”

Me: “Sorry, we don’t have long neck Carlsberg.”

Customer: “I’ll have a can of Carlsberg then, please.”

Me: *internal sigh* “Sorry, we don’t sell cans of any kind; also, we don’t have Carlsberg. Would any other kind of lager be okay?”

Customer: “Oh, it’s not for me. It’s for my husband. Hold on. I’ll go check what he would have instead.” *goes and comes back* “Okay. Can I have a pint of Carlsberg, please?”

Related:
At Lagerheads, Part 3
At Lagerheads, Part 2
At Lagerheads

Really Tee’d Off Over Closing Time

, | UK | Crazy Requests, Theme Of The Month

(I work in a bar at my local golf club. We have closed at 7 pm for years now. I’ve just collected the last glasses and pulled the shutters down over the bar apart from the one which allows me to get in and out. I’m in the middle of cashing down the day’s takings.)

Customer: *at 7:30* “Are you open?”

Me: *dumbfounded* “No, sir. We closed about half an hour ago and I’m just finishing the last of my tasks behind the bar.”

Customer: “Well, you should be open for people like me who like to be the last to tee off on the course in the day!” *walks off in a huff*