Enveloped In Holiday Spirit

| Wilmington, DE, USA | Right | December 30, 2016

(I work for a local bank, and we give out free holiday money envelopes during November & December. We only get two boxes, so we limit five per customer to make the supply last. Most people understand while a few get bent out of shape. This customer is usually a grouch every time he visits.)

Coworker: “Okay, here is your cash. Can I help you with anything else today?”

Grumpy Regular: “Do you have any Christmas envelopes?”

Coworker: “Yes, how many would you like? I can give you about five.” *retrieves five envelopes, and hands them to him*

Grumpy Regular: “I need eight.”

Coworker: “I’m sorry, but we have a limit of five per customer. We run out before Thanksgiving if we don’t.”

Grumpy Regular: “I ONLY WANT THREE MORE! I come to this branch all the time!”

Coworker: “I understand, but five is the limit.”

Grumpy Regular: *throws envelopes at my coworker* “YOU KNOW WHAT!? I’M SWITCHING TO [National Bank with terrible customer service]! THIS IS RIDICULOUS!” *storms out*

Coworker: “Merry Christmas!”

(Thank God we ran out of the envelopes a few days later!)

Very Personal Banking

| AL, USA | Working | December 30, 2016

(I am working as a bank teller at a small bank branch. I’m also very pregnant, so sometimes my ‘pregnant brain’ turns on and I forget something, say something strange, or cry at the most ridiculous things. All my coworkers are women and have young kids, so they help me out when I’m having a bad day, and we all laugh when I do anything crazy. I have a younger male customer come in and start walking towards my window. I start to greet him, but instead of “Hi, what can I do for you today?” my pregnant brain takes over and I says.)

Me: “Hi, what can I do to you today? Wait! No! I mean… not do TO you. I meant, oh, wow, this is going downhill fast.”

(That poor man’s face was so red, and all my coworkers laughed at me the rest of the afternoon.)

Reindeer Sneer

| TX, USA | Right | December 22, 2016

(It is Christmas Eve, and I am wearing a headband with reindeer antlers.)

Customer: “What is that on your head?!”

Me: *quite startled* “Um… Reindeer antlers?”

Customer: *scowling* “NO.” *walks away*

Crimea River

| Seattle, WA, USA | Right | December 19, 2016

(My parents and I have been living in the USA for about twenty years. We moved here from Ukraine and still have a house there for vacation trips. My mom sends money to a neighbor each month to keep an eye on the property and maintain the grounds.)

Mom: *hands form to bank teller the form with the information for the recipient, including the address*

Teller: “Umm… where are you trying to send this money to?”

Mom: “To a friend in Ukraine.”

Teller: “Ukraine? I’ve never heard of it…”

Mom: “It’s a country in Eastern Europe, near Russia.”

Teller: “Are you sure? I’ve never heard of it.”

Mom: “Well, I lived there for nearly 40 years before moving to America. So I’m quite sure.”

Teller: “I don’t know if we can send money there. I’m not even sure if it’s a real place, I’ve never heard of it.”

Mom: “I’m sure you can. I’ve been sending money there every single month for years and have never had a problem at this bank before.”

(At this point I’m getting annoyed so I pull out my smartphone and bring up a world map to show her.)

Me: “See? It’s right there. On the map. Do you trust the map?”

Teller: “I guess. I just don’t know why I’ve never heard of it.”

Me: *rolls eyes*

Teller: “Okay. So, the city is [Name] but you’ve left the space for the state blank.”

Mom: “Ukraine doesn’t have any states. It’s a pretty small country.”

Teller: “But why does the form have a space for ‘state,’ then?”

Me: “Because some countries have separate states or provinces. But not all of them. Ukraine doesn’t, so on the mailing address it’s just the city, country, and postal code.”

Teller: “But the form…”

(By this time my mom and I are getting frustrated since we’re wasting time on an errand that usually is pretty straightforward and quick. )

Mom: “Can you please just enter the information in the computer? I don’t have time to explain how geography works to you.”

Teller: *enters the information into the computer system* “Oh, wow, it seems to have gone through! I guess you were right.”

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Speaking Plainly

| GA, USA | Right | December 6, 2016

(I work at a financial institution opening new accounts. I am about to print a debit card for a new customer. We only offer two patterns of card, a simple card with just our logo, and a card with a very detailed picture of an airplane on it.)

Me: “All right, sir. For our cards we have two options: the logo and the airplane. Which do you prefer?” *shows picture of cards*

Customer: “I’ll have the plane.”

Me: “Good choice! That one’s my favorite.”

Customer: “Yeah, anything but that plane one!”

Me: *confused* “Oh, so you did want the logo, not the plane?”

Customer: “Yeah, I want the second one, not the plane one.”

Me: *shows pictures again* “You want this one?” *points at logo*

Customer: “No, I want THAT one.” *points at plane* “The other one is so plain.”

Me: *light-bulb goes off* “So you want the airplane instead of the BORING one!”

Customer: Yeah!

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