| VA | Unfiltered

(I’m working the drive-thru after everyone but the manager has left. A man comes through with a check from the bank next door and asks to have it cashed.)

Me: No problem! Just let me find you in our system.

(I look up his name, but can’t find it anywhere. Next, I look up the name of the person who wrote the check.)

Me: Sir, I can’t find you or the person who wrote the check in our system. Do you have an account number?

Man: Why do you need my account number? I’ve had an account with you guys for years! I should be in there!

Me: I could be typing something wrong. Let me try again.

(I go through the same process, and still find nothing.)

Me: I really can’t seem to find you in here, and this check is for the other bank.

Man: The check is for this bank! Let me speak to your manager!

(I catch my manager as he’s leaving, and watch as he goes out the door and gestures for the man to pull forward. After a few moments, the man speeds off as fast as he can, and my manager comes back in laughing.)

Manager: He thought he actually was at (bank next door)!

(Predictably, the man never came back to apologize for his behavior.)

Flirt, Camera, Action

| USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Love/Romance, Popular, Rude & Risque, Technology

(I am filling in at a different branch on this particular day. A guy who looks old enough to be my dad walks up to my window.)

Me: “What can I help you with?”

Customer: “Yeah, I need to get a money order today.”

Me: “Sure thing. Do you have an account with us?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “Okay, no problem, I’ll just need your ID and a few other pieces of information to get that done for you.”

Customer: “Ask away. I do this every month!”

(I quickly complete the transaction, as the customer is staring at me, and I am extremely uncomfortable. After I hand him the money order…)

Me: “Is there anything else I can help you with today?”

Customer: “I was also lookin’ for a cute girl…” *grins at me and leans in closer*

(I take a small step backward and try not to let my expression change.)

Me: “Is there anything else BANKING-related that I can help you with today?”

Customer: *visibly disappointed* “Well, no. That didn’t work, huh?”

Me: “Er… no.”

Customer: “Oh, well. At least that wasn’t on tape or anything. That would be really embarrassing.”

(Without saying a word, I point to the security camera above my head.)

Customer: *looks up, expression goes from disappointment to horror* “THOSE THINGS ACTUALLY WORK?!”

Me: “Yes, sir, they sure do.”

Customer: “NOW IT’S ON TAPE?!” *runs out the door*

Coworker: “What was THAT?!”

Me: *puts head down on counter* “I think it’s time for a break…”

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 53

| Seattle, WA, USA | Crazy Requests, Money

(My husband is in line at the bank. He has to wait a while, as there is a customer being served ahead of him cashing a check.)

Cashier: *to customer* “Just to remind you, ma’am, you can deposit the check, but you can’t withdraw any money from it for a few days.”

Customer: “WHY NOT?! IT’S MY MONEY!”

Cashier: *patiently* “Well, you’ve had six checks bounce this month alone, it’s bank policy, plus overdraft fees from your checks…”

Customer: “What has that got to do with anything? I want my money!”

Cashier: *sighs*

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 52
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 51
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 50

Cash Back Attack, Part 2

| IL, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Money, Popular

(I’m working our drive-thru lanes with another teller. A customer comes through our business lane and asks that I exchange some coins for him. I do this, give him cash back in a sealed money envelope, and he drives off. 10 minutes later, he comes back through the drive-thru…)

Customer: *to me* “You! You didn’t give me enough cash back!”

Me: “I’m sorry?”


Me: “Is it stuck to another one of the bills, sir?”

Customer: “Of course not. This is what you gave me. I want my d*** money right now!”

Me: “Let me go count my drawer and I’ll see if I can find that $20 for you.”

(I count my entire drawer, and discover I balance perfectly.)

Me: “Sir, my drawer is perfectly balanced. Are you sure the $20 isn’t stuck to something else?”

Customer: “I don’t give a flying s*** if your drawer is f*****g balanced! You cheated me out of my d*** $20 and I want you to give it to me RIGHT NOW!”

Me: “Please don’t use that language with me.”

Customer: “I can talk however the h*** I want!”

Me: “I’ll ask you again to not to use that language with me. What I will do is get a supervisor to count my drawer again.”

Customer: “You tell your supervisor to get her a** over here right f*****g now!”

(I grab a supervisor. She counts my drawer slowly and makes sure the customer can see her through the window. Again, it comes up balanced.)

Supervisor: “Sir? Her drawer is coming up balanced. I’ve checked her transaction history and it’s showing she gave you the $20.”



Supervisor: “I’m not going to do that. I have no proof that she did anything other than give it to you.”


Coworker: “Sir, did you look on your seat for the $20?”

Customer: *looks down* “…Oh. Here it is. Right on my seat.”

Supervisor: “Good, I’m glad you found it. Now, have a nice day.”

Customer: “I just wanted to make sure that you didn’t cheat me. I don’t like to be cheated. I guess I’m sorry.”

(My jaw drops. I click the drive-thru mic off and mouth “Shame on you” at the customer as he drives away.)

Supervisor: “A**hole.” *looks at me and my coworker* “Sorry! I shouldn’t have said that. Are you okay, [My Name]?”

Me: “Yeah, you only said what we all were thinking…”

Cash Back Attack

Crazy Customer? Fits The Bill

| USA | Crazy Requests, Money, Politics

(I work at a bank in a small lake-side city with lots of retired older folks. While working the drive-thru I have this exchange.)

Me: “Good morning!”

Customer: “I want to exchange this for 500 dollar bills.”

(He places a stack of 20s, 50s, and 100s in the drawer.)

Me: “Sir… I’m sorry we don’t have any 500s I can exchange the smaller bills for one hundred dollar bi—“


Me: “Sir, we can’t even order those bills; they stopped printing them back in the 1970s.”

(The customer glares at me for a few moments, grabs his money out of the drawer and points at me.)

Customer: “I know what’s going on here. You’re covering for him.”

Me: “What?”

Customer: “This is Obama’s doing!”

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