Indiscriminate Discrimi-nation, Part 2

| Auckland, New Zealand | Bigotry

Caller: “Can I speak with [banker name]?”

Me: “I’m so sorry, but she’s in a meeting right now. Is there something I can help with?”

Caller: “I’m having trouble hearing you. Can you speak up?”

(I move my headset closer.)

Me: “Is there anything I can help you with?”

Caller: “Your accent is appalling! I hate talking to you Asians!”

Me: *mild shock* “Ma’am, I’m a kiwi, born and bred.”

Caller: “Nonsense! Where were you born?”

Me: “At [giant public hospital in Auckland].”

Caller: “Oh, but your parents must be Asians! They’re everywhere!”

Me: “No, ma’am. My parents are Scottish stock, and have been here five generations.”

Caller: “D*** you Asians!” *click*

Related:
Indiscriminate Discrimi-nation

Customer, Know Thyself

| San Jose, CA, USA | Awesome Customers, Top

(I am a customer standing in line at the bank. Two customers behind me start complaining about the length of the line.)

Customer #1: “Look at this! It’s ridiculous!”

Customer #2: “They are moving so slow! The workers should get fired for being so lazy!”

(This goes on for a couple of minutes. When I draw even with the complaining customers in the switchbacked line, I decide I can’t take it anymore and speak up.)

Me: “Look at the windows, ladies! Every one of them has customers who didn’t take the time to fill out their slips. Now the tellers have to do it for them, and that takes twice as long! They’re the ones holding up all of us, not the nice people trying to help them!”

(Note: I’m talking loud enough for everyone at the windows to hear, hoping maybe next time they’ll wise up.)

Customers #1 and #2: *shocked*

Me: “Let me guess. Wanna borrow my pen?”

(The complaining customers sheepishly agree and fill out their slips. Three or four others in line also grab slips and start scribbling, while the customers at the windows look suitably embarrassed. When I finally get to a teller window, she leans towards me and confides in me.)

Teller: *whispering* “Thank you, from everyone here! I wish I could save the security tape of that!”

Non-Sufficient Dunce

| Canada | Money

(A customer calls in to find out why his loan has been returned “NSF”, which is short for “Non-Sufficient Funds.”)

Me: “I see that the loan was returned on Monday as there was not enough money in the account.

Customer: “Yeah, but it was supposed to be taken out of my account the previous Friday.”

(I check, and he indeed did not have enough money to cover the loan on Friday.)

Me: “That is the correct date, but it looks like the computer gave you a grace period. It gave you a few days to put the funds in the account before it tried to take it.”

Customer: “That’s crazy! I agreed to have my payments taken every Friday. I want the loan to bounce on the Friday, not on the Monday, okay? Make my loan payment bounce on Fridays!”