Things Are About To Take A Dark Tone

, , , , | Right | September 7, 2017

(I’m the only dark-skinned person working in my branch. I’m pretty used to snide commentary from customers, but this one…)

Me: “Good afternoon, sir!”

Customer: “Wow, I’ve never gotten any brown sugar lovin’ before! Come give me a kiss!” *makes a kissy face at me*

Me: *too dumbfounded to speak*

Customer: “I’m just kidding, I need to deposit these.”

Me: *still so dumbfounded that I run his transaction and send him on his way without speaking another word*

Coworker: “I cannot believe that just happened.”

That Escalated Quickly

, , , , | Right | September 7, 2017

(The teller next to me is very popular with customers and they sometimes get lost in conversation with her.)

Customer: “So, our barn cat had a litter and they’re just as precious as can be.”

Coworker & Me: “Awww!”

Customer: “Yup, we’re working on giving them away but…”

(I tune him out to help a couple of customers myself. When I come back…)

Customer: “…so they arrested my mom again, even though the neighbors had stolen every last thing out of her house! And that’s why I need to cash the check, to get her out.”

Unfiltered Story #91479

, , | Unfiltered | August 15, 2017

(Unfortunately, I am the customer in this one. I walk into my bank after work.)

Me: *approaching the teller* “I’m so glad you guys are on my way home otherwise I would have totally forgotten I need to do this.”

Teller: “What can I help you with?”

Me: “Well, last night I got a replacement debit card since my current one expires next month. I did the right and proper adult thing and cut up my old card as soon as I activated the new one…”

Teller: *seeing where I’m going with this* “Oh… oh no…”

Me: “And, about a half hour later, I’m in the drive thru and realize my old card is still in my wallet… so, what can we do to get a new one ordered?”

Teller: *cringing, laughing, and pointing to the desk not too far away* “Talk to [account rep] and she can get a new one ordered no problem.”

IP Address:
70.208.3.92

Money Makes The Moans Go Round

, , , , | Right | August 12, 2017

(I was just clocking into work, and since I am a traveling teller, meaning I go to different locations every day, I have to wait for the manager of the specific branch to give me a drawer.)

Customer: “Excuse me? What are you doing?”

(I continue starting up my computer, assuming she isn’t speaking to me as I still have my ‘next window’ sign up.)

Customer: *to others in line* “Look at that dumb b****, sitting around doing nothing but play with her hair when there’s a line out of the door!”

Me: “Excuse me, ma’am? I am not yet up and ready; my shift has just started. I’m sure another teller will be with you in just one moment. Your patience is appreciated.”

Customer: *rolls eyes*

(After a few moments, she finally reaches another teller, and the following conversation happens after her transaction is completed.)

Customer: “Why would you even hire such a lazy, incompetent girl?”

Coworker: “She actually doesn’t have a drawer yet, so she has no cash to work with.”

Customer: “If I wanted to hear excuses, I would have talked to her. Next time I’m in here, she better be fired! I will be reporting her to management. She should have brought her own cash in if you guys were busy.”

Coworker: “Ma’am? You wanted her to bring thousands of dollars of her own money so you wouldn’t have to wait a few moments on Friday afternoon at a very busy bank?”

Customer: “Yes! That would have been the right thing to do.”

(I was yelled at the first two minutes of my shift. I decided this had to be some sort of record, and we all had a good laugh about it in the end. Joke’s on you, lady. You didn’t ruin my day; you just made me laugh! Plus, she didn’t even get my name so she could report me.)

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 68

, , , , , | Right | August 9, 2017

(I work for a bank where the majority of our accounts are with college-age students. Many of them have never before had a bank account or had any financial education. A lot of our calls deal with upset account holders with negative or overdrawn accounts, and they can’t understand how it got that way. This call lasts about an hour total, an hour that I will never get back.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Bank]. I am [My Name]. May I please have your account number?”

Customer: *provides account number and verifies herself*

Me: “Thank you for that information; how can I help you today?”

Customer: “Yeah, um, I should have more money in my account. Why don’t I have any more money?”

Me: *pulls up statements and reviews them quickly* “I’m sorry, ma’am, it looks like you spent your funds in the last week or so. I’m seeing a lot of transactions on your statements. Have you looked at them yourself?”

Customer: “Yeah, I looked at them, and I know I bought all that stuff, but I should have more money. Where’s the rest of it?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. It appears you’ve spent all the money currently in your account. The balance you see displayed is how much you have left.”

Customer: “NO! I know I should have more money. I did NOT spend that much. WHERE IS THE REST OF MY MONEY?!”

(As a way to calm the customer, I offer to go over their transactions with them one by one and explain how the money got spent. I proceed to spend the next half hour going line by line in their statement, explaining the debits of each purchase and the remaining balance after the purchase starting from when they received their deposit earlier in the week.)

Me: “So you see, ma’am, this is why your account is at this balance. The purchases we just went over brought your total to what you see now. Do you think any of the items should be disputed as an unauthorized transaction?”

Customer: “Hmm, uh-huh, yes, I do recall all of those purchases. I just don’t understand where all my money went.”

Me: “Ma’am, as we discussed, you spent the money. There is nothing left from your deposit. What you see is what you have.”

Customer: “So then why don’t I see the rest of my money? Did your company take it? Are you stealing from me?”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m not sure what money you are referring you. You received a deposit of [amount] on [Date] and since then you’ve spent all but the $5.14 you see now on your balance page. We just went over each transaction you made since the deposit and you confirmed them with me. You have spent all your funds; there is no more money left.”

Customer: “What do you mean? I KNOW I have more money. You took it! I know you did! Your company is a sham! I’m telling everyone to stay away from you.”

(This tirade goes on for over five minutes, with her screaming obscenities, calling me a liar, demanding I put the money back into her account, etc.)

Customer: You’ll be hearing from my lawyer!” *slams phone*

Me: *stunned silence*

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