Doesn’t Know Zip About His Code

| AL, USA | Right | January 11, 2016

(I am processing a customer’s application and realize his zip code on his account is ****6 but the one on his application is ****1. Wanting to correct the mistaken one I ask him.)

Me: “Excuse me. Sir, what is your zip code?”

Customer: “It’s ****4.”

Me: “Sir, you put ****1 on your application and our account is showing ****6. That’s 3 different zip codes.

Customer: “Oh, it doesn’t matter. They are all the same city, so I just give whichever one pops into my head first.”

Making A Meal Out Of Not Celebrating Christmas

| IN, USA | Working | December 24, 2015

(Our department celebrates holidays with each person bringing in a covered dish, and the manager ordering the main dish, like pizza. One of my coworkers claims to belong to a religious faith that does not celebrate holidays. We are careful not to offend her, and she gets the same amount of time off for the meal as the rest of us. She is never asked to bring in a dish for the holiday meals, but she has no qualms about partaking of our meals. One Christmas Eve, we have our holiday dinner at lunchtime, including various holiday-themed items like Christmas cookies, stollen, and even red and green pasta (tomato and spinach).)

Coworker: *fills her plate with Christmas-themed food and heads back to her desk*

Me: “Oh, hey, [Coworker]! I thought you didn’t celebrate holidays.”

Coworker: “I don’t, but I’m hungry and these all look so good.”

Me: “They’re very good. [Other Coworker] made the stollen and [Another Coworker] brought in the pasta. I brought the cookies. Almost everyone contributed something.”

Coworker: “Yeah, it’s a good thing they brought food in. Now I can work through lunch and still get paid for it!”

(While working lunches were the norm for our busy department, we took our lunch breaks for the holiday party since we weren’t actually working.)

Me: “Oh, well, glad we could do that for you.”

Money Talks

| Italy | Working | December 9, 2015

(I spend several months abroad for work. During that period, because of a lack of communication between the tellers and the management of the first bank, I am considered “unreachable” and my account is frozen. On the account I have a standing order for my car’s monthly payments, so I promptly call their customer service…)

Operator: “[Car Brand] financial service. How can I help you?”

Me: “Hello, this is [My Name]. I have a problem with my bank account and now it’s frozen, but I’m abroad. Is there a way, like a bank transfer, to send my payments?”

Operator: “Certainly, sir. I need your account number, then we need to activate an automatic charge—”

Me: “I’m afraid it will not work. As I told you before, I’m now abroad and in this moment I don’t have any active bank accounts in Italy. I believe I can do an international transfer every month. Will that be good for you?”

Operator: “No, sir, the only way is via an automatic charge on a national bank account.”

Me: “Listen, the problem is that I have no bank account in Italy, I’m abroad, the car is abroad, and I won’t be back for at least eight months. So, you won’t have neither the money or a car to repossess.”

Supervisor: “Hello, Mr [My Name]. I’m the shift supervisor of [Car Brand] Financial Services. International transfer, you said? No problem, sir. You can send your monthly payment to…”

(Funny that when they risk losing money there’s always a solution!)

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 46

| Eugene, OR, USA | Right | November 27, 2015

(I work as a teller, and one of my jobs is to field phone calls.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Bank]; this is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I’m trying to make an online purchase with my debit card and it’s not working! I need you to fix this.”

Me: “Well, sir, it sounds like your card may be blocked. I can transfer—”

Customer: *interrupting* “No! This is a brand new card; I just got it today from the bank. Now they told me it would work, and it doesn’t!”

Me: “That’s odd, let me…”

Customer: “And another thing! How do you get away with issuing already expired cards?”

Me: “Well, sir, our temporary cards expire after a set time, but they are always good when issued.”

Customer: “No! This one says February 18th, right on there! Now today is the 24th, which means this is expired!”

Me: *face-palm* “Sir… all cards list the expiration date as month and year. That is February of 2018 listed on the card, and I assure you if you use that date you will be able to make your purchase.”

Customer: “That’s… that’s not what I was told! I was told this would expire this year!”

Me: “Yes, sir. The temporary card will. However it must have the same expiration date listed on it as the permanent card with the same number that is being mailed to you. I promise, February of 2018 will work.”

Customer: “Well… I suppose I’ll try it. But that’s darn foolish!” *click*

Related:
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 45
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 44
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 43

Cash Crashed

| Port Jervis, NY, USA | Friendly | November 20, 2015

(It’s Sunday and my bank has an ATM that’s just inside the building, but not inside the actual bank. To get in, you insert your debit card and open the door, kind of like a hotel. I was going to make a deposit, as I’m primarily paid in cash. There’s another lady in there using the ATM.)

Lady: “What are you doing here?”

Me: “I just need to use the ATM; I’ll wait until you’re done.”

Lady: “But, what are you DOING here? The bank’s closed!”

Me: “I can see that ma’am. I just want to use the ATM.”

Lady: “Why are you here? You can’t be here. The bank is closed!”

Me: “Ma’am, I got in the same way you did, with my card. I’m just going to use the ATM after you’re finished.”

(The lady just looks at me a moment, looks back at the ATM, and then back at me.)

Lady: “But why are you here?”

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