Unlucky Number Seventeen

| Myrtle Beach, SC, USA | Working | April 26, 2016

(I’m about 17. I’d left my debit card at the ATM, which retracted it after 30 seconds. I am going in to pick it up.)

Teller: “I’ll need to see two forms of ID.”

Me: “Ouch. I only have my student ID. I don’t really have anything else on me. What can I do?”

Teller: “You don’t have a driver’s license? At your age?”

Me: “No.”

Teller: “What about a cell phone bill?”

Me: *kind of surprised* “Why would I have any kind of bill in my name? I’m 17. I still live with my parents.”

Teller: “My daughter is 17 and pays her own cell phone bill.”

Me: “Do you really think that’s the norm?”

(In the end, my mom had to present HER two forms of ID, since she was co-signed to my account, for me to get my card back.)

Trouble Is No Trouble At All

| USA | Working | April 23, 2016

(I work at the main location of this particular bank. As a result, there are members of upper management who are in and out frequently. One particular lady has a reputation of being the one who shows up when someone is about to get fired. Even my boss is afraid of her. On this particular day, I see her come in and realize with horror that she is making a beeline for my desk.)

Manager: “Hi, [My Name]?”

Me: *nervously* “Er… yes?”

(My fear grows as I watch my boss get up, grab her coffee and her purse, and make a quick exit into a back room. The other manager sees it, too.)

Manager: “No, no, no. I know what they say, but you’re not in trouble. I just had a question about a client that you helped the other day.”

Me: “Oh! Well, sure. Ask away!”

(I answer her question quickly. I notice that she’s looking at my computer background, which is me and a few friends goofing off at a charity event hosted by my church.)

Manager: “I couldn’t help noticing your background. That looks like a fun group of people!”

Me: “That is from an event my church held to benefit [Non-profit]. And it was a lot of fun!”

Manager: “Really? My church also supports [Non-profit]! Where do you attend?”

(We strike up a 10-minute conversation. During this time, I notice my boss peeking her head out of the back room every couple minutes.)

Manager: “Well, I’ve got to run back to my meeting. I’ll be sure to bring you that magazine article tomorrow; I think you’d really like it!”

Me: “Great! Can’t wait to read it!”

Manager: “Enjoy the rest of your day, [My Name]!”

(She exits. Not 30 seconds later, my boss pounces.)

Boss: “What did you do?!”

Me: “What do you mean, what did I do?”

Boss: “She was here for FIFTEEN MINUTES. You must’ve done SOMETHING.”

Me: “Excuse me?! All she did was ask a question about a customer I waited on the other day. Then, we got off topic and started talking about other stuff. That’s all. No one is in trouble!”

Boss: “…Oh.”

(Six months later, I was transferred to another area. The manager of that department? The lady from upper management who scared everyone. Almost two years later, I still work for her. We’ve become great friends. She’s the best boss I’ve ever had!)

Methinks He Doth Protest-ant Too Much

| Hamilton, ON, Canada | Working | April 22, 2016

Boss: “Now, I’m not biased. But it’s just obvious that if you’re Catholic, I’m going to like you a bit more.”

The Convenience Of Being Eight

| Staten Island, NY, USA | Related | April 18, 2016

(I am at the bank with my eight-year-old son. His bladder is about to burst.)

Eight-Year-Old Son: “Excuse me, sir, where’s the restroom?”

Bank Employee: “Oh, sorry, we don’t have a restroom for customers just yet.”

Me: “Let’s use the restroom next door!”

Bank Employee: “There’s another one across the street.”

Eight-Year-Old Son: “No! We’re not going anywhere. Your sign right there says, ‘America’s Most Convenient Bank.’ Could you please let me use your restroom so I feel convenient?”

(Kid got what he fought for: access to the private restroom and complimentary pens and notepads, and had the nerve to ask if they had a lollipop! He walked out of the bank like he owned it.)

Twenty-Twenty Service

| Allentown, PA, USA | Working | April 13, 2016

(I’m at the bank to make my store’s daily deposit, plus a few other things. The teller is very good at her job and takes care of everything in short order.)

Teller: “Is there anything else I can do for you today?”

Me: *playfully* “Not unless you’re handing out free twenties.”

Teller: *with a perfectly straight face* “Not today, I’m afraid. But I heard they might be giving them out on Sunday.”

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