A Hit Of Caffeine

| CA, USA | Bizarre, Wild & Unruly

(The bakery closes at two pm every Sunday. I am out on the patio about an hour after closing, sweeping and stacking furniture. A middle-aged customer and her elderly mother approach.)

Daughter: “Oh, hi! We’d like to get some coffee, please.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, but the coffee’s all gone now. We’re closed.”

Daughter: “You are?”

Me: “Yes. I’m afraid we close at two on Sundays.”

Mother: “Oh, you bad girl!”

(The customer proceeds to hit me with her rolled up newspaper, leaving me speechless!)

How To Make Your Cake Extra ‘Special’

| NC, USA | Food & Drink, Funny Names

(I am helping a customer place an order for two cakes.)

Me: “Okay, that’s about everything. Did you want anything written on the cakes?”

Customer: “I’m not sure.” *turns to his wife* “Honey, what should I have written on the cakes? How about ‘Pot’ on one and ‘Luck’ on the other since it’s a potluck?”

Customer’s Wife: “Are you asking if I think you should have ‘Pot’ written on a cake?”

Customer: “Good point. No, nothing written on them.”

Me: “Sounds like a good choice.”

The Argument Crumbles Like A Cookie

| Stockholm, Sweden | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

(It is early November.)

Customer: “Do you have any gingerbread cookies?”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am. We don’t.”

Customer: “Why would you not even have gingerbread cookies?”

Me: “Sorry, but we haven’t even started making them yet this year.”

Customer: “What? Why the f*** not?”

Me: “Because here at [Shop’s Name], we like to follow the traditions and not start baking Christmas cookies until Christmas time.”

Customer: “Ah, I see! I’m glad to hear that you follow the traditions. All shops should be like you. I don’t get it why people just can’t wait these days. Everyone is just so d*** greedy!” *wanders off*