They Are Bali Listening

| Melbourne, VIC, Australia | Bad Behavior, Bizarre, Geography, Tourists/Travel

(I am in the bakery to buy bread when I overhear an argument. It’s clear that this customer is a regular, since the bakers have a bit of a laugh with him.)

Customer: “Where were you last week?”

Baker: “I was in Bali.”

Customer: “What? Why were you there?”

Baker: “Uh… for a holiday?”

Customer: “But why go on holiday?”

Baker: “Because… I wanted to? And it was nice there?”

(The customer goes on and on about Bali being a horrible place, so I decide to pitch in.)

Me: “What’s wrong with Bali? It’s a beautiful place.”

Customer: “Never been. Don’t want to go. I’m allergic to Bali.”


| Cleveland, OH, USA | Unfiltered

(I work in a kosher bakery right before Rosh Hashana (the Jewish New Year). As I’m helping other customers, one of my coworkers is helping a customer with his order. Challah is a traditional Jewish sweet bread. The customer has ordered a 1lb whole wheat challah and a 2lb raisin challah, and is adamant that it has been packaged wrong and he hasn’t been given what he ordered. My coworker spends about 10 minutes talking to him and trying to sort out the problem, but neither ever take them out of the bag. Finally I come over.)

Me: *to coworker* “Maybe I can help. Why don’t you go help someone else in the meantime?”

Coworker: “Okay.”

(The coworker leaves.)

Me: *to Customer* “Okay, what’s the problem?”

Customer: “I ordered a 1lb whole wheat challah and a 2lb raisin challah! This bag is not what I ordered!”

Me: “Okay, I’m very sorry about this mistake. We have lots of other challahs here, let me just switch them for you.”

(I proceed to pull the challahs out of the bag in order to switch them. The customer looks at the challahs for a minute.)

Customer: *pointing to the 1lb challah* “Is that one whole wheat?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: *pointing to the 2lb challah* “Is that one raisin?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “Oh, I thought they were switched. That’s what I ordered.”

(The customer put the challahs back in the bag and left.)


It Doesn’t Matter As Long As It Matters

| Chicago, IL, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink

(Our chocolate and vanilla cupcakes have a lot of variation in decoration from icing color to type of sprinkle. Some version of this conversation happens several times a day.)

Me: “Do you have a decoration preference?”

Customer: “Oh, it doesn’t matter.” *as I reach for the nearest cupcake* “Oh, no, I wanted the blue one!”


Not Bready For The Holidays

| NC, USA | Holidays

(I work the morning shift in a bakery on Christmas Eve of 2014. I am pretty new, and it is overwhelming. There are hundreds of pre-orders, and most of the regular sale breads are gone within an hour. I’ve had to turn away several people who wanted Christmas breads at this point.)

Customer: “I’d like a loaf of cinnamon raisin bread.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, we’re sold out.”

Customer: “What do you mean?”

Me: “I mean we’ve sold all of the cinnamon raisin bread. I could recommend—”

Customer: “Well, it’s Christmas Eve. You should have baked more!”

Me: “Ma’am, all of our bakers were up all night baking extras–”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! I can see a loaf right there!”

Me: “Ma’am, that is a pre-ordered loaf. Some people have ordered weeks in advance and–”

Customer: “But I’m here now!”

Me: “But that bread was ordered by another person. Ma’am, I can recommend a different–”


(The customer storms away, and I’m left blinking in shock. The next customer is a kind elderly lady with a pre-order that happens to include cinnamon raisin bread. A few minutes later, the original customer has apparently gotten back in line and has reached my register.)

Customer: “Hey, why did that woman get bread!”

Me: “Ma’am, she pre-ordered last week–”

Customer: “But I was here first!”

Me: *heavy sigh*

(This went on for a minute or two until she declared I’d ruined her Christmas once more and stormed out for good.)


Not Bready For The Holidays

| OH, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Holidays

(We’re a small bread store that bakes everything fresh daily. We don’t have anything frozen or hidden in the back to sell, though some customers don’t seem to understand this. It is Christmas Eve and we have been slammed with customers. Even though we close at three, we’ve sold out of pretty much everything by noon. It is 2:30 and my dad and I are cleaning up and getting ready to close up shop. At this point, we’re just waiting on a couple of orders and we’ve put a ‘sold out’ sign in the window. Despite the sign, some people have wandered in and asked if we’re really sold out of bread, but are polite and understanding when we tell them we’ve got only a couple cookies left. I’m cleaning up some of the unending flour mess when this couple walks in:)

Dad: “Hello! As you can see, we’re pretty much sold out.”

Lady: “What’s that there?” *points at the rack where we’ve got the remaining orders*

Dad: “Those are orders we’re holding.”

Lady: “I’ll buy that loaf there.”

Dad: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but that bread belongs to someone who placed an order earlier. All we’ve got are these cookies and this roll.”

Lady: “But I’m here and I have money.”

Dad: *trying not to lose his cool and yell at her* “Ma’am, that loaf is already sold.”

Lady: “You’re really out of bread?”

Dad: “Yes. Sorry about that. Have a Merry Christmas!”

(The couple leaves. Just as the door closes and they walk down the street.)

Dad: “You’d be really mad if that order was yours and I sold it!”

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