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Inside-Out Cat

, , , , | Related | September 23, 2016

(I am a volunteer cat caretaker at a local animal shelter. Essentially I clean up, groom, and feed all rescued kitties and try to talk folk into adopting them. On this day a man and daughter are coo-ing over one of our recently arrived kittens that I’ve let out into the play area.)

Daughter: “Ooooh, daddy this one is so precious! And look, she loves me!” *the kitten is indeed licking her hand, purring, and rubbing its face against her* “Are you sure we can’t get another cat?”

Dad: “No, dear, not after what happened with the last one. I don’t want to have to replace the microwave again!”

(The daughter looked pouty and left with her father. I immediately put the kitten safely back in its cage and try not to shudder at the possible connotations of what was just said.)


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A Party Pooper

, , , , , , | Working | September 2, 2016

(We got heavily into debt as a young couple with two children and have just managed to pay off our car loans and all of our credit cards without filing for bankruptcy. We cancel all the cards but one with a low limit for emergencies and commit to living debt-free (i.e. no credit cards, loans, etc.). We call to book my son’s birthday party at the same indoor amusement park where we did it last year, and since we don’t want to give our credit card for the deposit, we opt instead to pay for the entire party in cash the day we book it. I drive downtown, make the payment, and get my receipt. I confirm at that point that on the day of the party we will have nothing to pay and will only have to show up, celebrate, and leave. On the day of the party, everything is going smoothly. Just after we do the presents, when the party is winding down, a young employee approaches us.)

Employee #1: “Hi! Looks like you guys are having a good time.”

Me: “Oh, yes. Everything has been wonderful, thanks.”

Employee: “Wonderful. This is for you.” *hands me a folded piece of paper* “You can take care of this with me at the front whenever you are ready.”

Me: “Oh, okay. Thanks.”

(I look at the paper and it is a bill for $35. I show it to my wife and we are puzzled. It just says “additional party costs” on it, but there’s no breakdown of what exactly the fee is for. I go to the counter to find out.)

Me: “Hi. I’m sorry, but I’m a little confused. What exactly is this fee for? The $35?”

Employee #1: “Um, for your party? That we’re hosting for you?”

(The employee beside her rolls her eyes and laughs at my apparent stupidity.)

Me: “Um, I get that I have to pay for the party; that’s why I paid for it last month.” *pulls my receipt out of my purse and shows her* “See? I paid in full, in cash, a month ago.”

Employee #2: “The rate for the party has gone up since you booked. We have to charge the amount it is now, not the amount it was when you booked it. That’s how we do things here. Now would you like to pay cash, credit, or debit?”

Me: “Um, debit, I guess. I’m still confused.”

Employee #1: “Well, you would be. You stay-at-home moms have no idea how things work in the workplace.”

Me: “I work full-time, thank you very much. I’ve probably been working since you were in diapers, so what I do know is that this is not proper customer service.”

Employee #1: “Are you gonna pay or do you want me to get my manager and security?”

Me: “Debit, please.”

(I pay and go back to my family and relate the story to my wife. She is livid and tells me that we are going to get our money back. We leave the kids with my in-laws in the party area and go back to the counter. The two employees see me coming and immediately roll their eyes and throw their heads back in frustration.)

Employee #1: *sighs in a very frustrated and rude tone* “Yes, ma’am… How can I help you this time?”

Me: “I would like to speak to your manager, please.”

Employee #1: *sighs again* “Fine, but she’s going to tell you exactly what I said.”

Employee #2: “God, some people…”

(The second employee calls the manager on their house phone and tells her something I can’t really hear. The manager arrives, looking very annoyed at us. She takes the employees aside for a moment and then comes back to us. The employees are standing behind her looking smug and smiling at us.)

Manager: “Good afternoon, ladies! I understand you two are having trouble understanding our pricing policy?”

Me: “Not exactly. I understand that you have raised your prices since last month and that people paying today would have to pay the current price, not the price of when they booked the party. That I’m not arguing with, although I don’t necessarily agree with it. My problem is this $35 bill you presented me with. I paid in cash, in full, for this party a month ago because we don’t like to use our credit cards.” *hands her my original receipt* “And I was assured we would have nothing to pay today. That $35 came out of my gas budget for the week; we budgeted very tightly for this party and I really wasn’t expecting to get a bill today.”

Manager: “I understand, but our prices have gone up since…” *looks at my receipt for a moment and looks up quickly* “Wait, you already paid? Last month?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. I paid in full at the price you advertised. I shouldn’t have to pay more today because the price went up. Would you expect to get a bill from [Major Department Store] for your shoes if the price went up after you bought them?”

Manager: “You are absolutely right, madam. This was our mistake and I am so sorry! Have you already paid this $35?”

Wife: “Yes, she paid with our debit card and we’d like a refund, please.”

Manager: “Absolutely, ladies. My sincere apologies for the misunderstanding. [Employee #1], would you refund this lady’s debit card and cancel this bill, please?”

Employee #1: “What? No!”

Manager: “Excuse me?”

Employee #1: “[Employee #2] told me to charge her! She said to. I didn’t do anything wrong! I just did my job!”

Manager: “Okay, I’m just going to take care of this myself.”

([Employee #2] now looks embarrassed. She gives us a quick apology and retreats, red-faced, into their little office. [Employee #1] is red-faced and angry.)

Employee #1: “I was told by [Employee #2] to do it. I did nothing wrong!”

Manager: *to us* “I’m so sorry about this. Can I take your debit card, please?”

Me: “Absolutely, and thank you for fixing this for us. I know it doesn’t sound like much, but $35 is a lot of money for us right now.”

Manager: “I understand.”

Employee #1: *now yelling with her arms crossed* “I was told to charge them! This isn’t fair! I didn’t do anything wrong, [Manager]. [Employee #2] told me to do it! This is f***ed up!”

Manager: “[Employee #1]! Do not argue with me! We will talk about this later. Now go into the office and wait for me. Ask [Employee #2] to come out here and cover the desk.”

Employee #1: “This is bulls***. I’m calling my father.”

Manager: “Your refund is complete; again, I am so sorry about this. It isn’t easy working with teens sometimes.”

Wife: “Tell me about it. I used to manage a fast food restaurant and believe me, I heard some variation of ‘I’m telling my father’ at least once a month from someone. I feel your pain.”

Manager: “I’m so glad you understand, and please don’t let this influence how you feel about us. Most of my staff are wonderful and we love to make our customers happy.”

Me: “We come here all the time. Believe me, I’ve seen your wonderful staff in action. We will be back!”

Manager: “Great! Look, here are a few coupons for some free activities and tokens for your next few visits. I think I’ve got some coupons for free pizza from the canteen back here somewhere…”

Me: “Don’t even worry; it’s all good. Thank you so much and have a lovely day.”

Manager: “You as well! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a young lady back here who’s just dying to talk with me.”


This story is part of our Birthday Party Roundup!

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Will Need Some Stress Medications After This

, , , , | Working | August 23, 2016

(I called several days ago to get some prescriptions written by my doctor, as they were originally prescribed to me in the hospital but are long-term medications for a few of my disorders. I spoke to my doctor’s nurse, who said that it would be no problem to get them; just come in and pick up the prescriptions. Note that, due to my being in the hospital so often, my doctor has a standing order with her office staff that no matter when I show up, with or without an appointment, she’ll make time to see me. This happens just after they hire a new receptionist.)

Me: *to the front desk receptionist* “Hi, I’m [My Name] and I’m here to pick up some prescriptions that [Doctor] wrote me. [Nurse] said they’d be ready by last week, but today’s the first time I’ve been able to get here.”

Receptionist: “There’s a note in your file that says you have to make an appointment with the doctor before you can get those medications. You can’t have the prescriptions.”

Me: “But [Nurse] told me it would be fine!”

Receptionist: “The note in your file says that you have to see the doctor.”

Me: “So why didn’t anyone call me to tell me this?”

Receptionist: “The note in your file says—“

Me: “I KNOW what the file says! I’m asking why no one thought to call me with this information! I live over two hours away! Why did I have to drive all the way here to find this out?!”

Receptionist: “Well, the note is in your file. You should have known.”

Me: “Really? You expect me to know what notes y’all put in your system, which I have no access to?”

Receptionist: “Well, the note is in your file. I don’t know what you want me to do about it.”

Me: “Actually, it’s your job to call people when things like this come up.”

Receptionist: “Well, I did put the note in your file, so I did let you know!”

Me: *mentally facepalming* “Okay, since I have to see the doctor, and I really need the medications today, just go tell [Doctor] I’m here and I’ll see her when she’s got a minute. I’ll wait.”

Receptionist: “She’s too busy to see you today.”

Me: “That’s why I said I’ll wait. She’ll work me in.”

Receptionist: “No, she won’t. I’ll make you an appointment for [date three months away].”

Me: “I can’t wait that long! Just let her know I’m here, please.”

Receptionist: “No. I won’t. Just because you forgot to get your medications filled, that doesn’t make this an emergency. It’s your fault; you deal with it.”

Me: “Wait, let me get this straight. I called for my medications over a week ago, no one called me to tell me that I had to see the doctor, you just put a note in my file in a system that I have no access to, you’re refusing to tell the doctor even though I know she’ll see me, and this is my fault?! By the way, I know there’s a note taped to the wall just behind your computer telling you that I’m one of the people she’ll always see, even without an appointment. Can you please look at it?”

Receptionist: *without even looking at the note* “No. It’s your fault. Now go away.”

Me: “No. Look at the note. I’m not leaving until you do.”

Receptionist: *finally looks at the note* “That isn’t you. You’re just trying to get special treatment.”

Me: “Yes, it is. Look at it. My name is [My Name], my birthday is [date], and my social security number is [number].”

Receptionist: “I still don’t believe you. I’m not going to interrupt the doctor just because you forgot your medications and didn’t read the note in your file. Now go away!

(She shouts the last part loud enough that several people in the waiting room turn to look. I’m near tears and have the beginnings of a panic attack. Luckily, her yelling brings my doctor into the reception office, as well.)

Doctor: “[Receptionist], why are you shouting at my patient?!”

Receptionist: “Because she won’t leave! I’ve told her that she has to talk to you about getting her medications, which I put a note in her file about, so she should have known! Now she’s saying she’s on this special list, but I don’t believe it’s her. I just think she’s making it up so she doesn’t have to wait three months like she should have to! It’s not my fault she forgot to get her meds on time!”

Doctor: “So, you put a note in her file but didn’t call her to let her know she had to come in, even though that’s part of your job? Then refused to let me know she’s here, even though she’s on my special list, just because you thought she was lying? Then you yelled at her in front of everyone, even though stress is listed in her files as something that can literally put her in the hospital, sometimes for weeks?!”

Receptionist: “No! I didn’t do anything wrong!”

Doctor: “You did everything wrong!

(The receptionist continued to argue and my doctor ended up having to call security to have her removed from the building. She was still screaming, “But I put a note in her file!” as she was being physically carried out. The kicker? It took my doctor less than five minutes to write the prescriptions I needed.)

The Most Dangerous Creature In The Room

, , | Friendly | August 11, 2016

(I own a 210 lbs, very lazy mastiff. I’ve taken him with me to a dog friendly brewery to meet with a friend of mine. Once we get there my dog promptly falls asleep. We are just talking when we are approached by a woman with a small dog.)

Woman: “You can’t have that beast here!”

Me: “Why not? You have your dog and mine has just as much right to be here as yours.”

Woman: “My dog actually behaves! That behemoth will wreck everything!”

(While she is saying this my dog is sound asleep not making a peep and hers is continually barking. Since I won’t back down she goes and gets the manager.)

Manager: “Sir, I’ve got reports that your dog is being aggressive and growling at other patrons.”

Me: “That’s not true at all. He’s been asleep the whole time we’ve been here.”

Woman: “No, he hasn’t! I heard him growling!”

(An admittedly loud noise comes from where my dog is laying.)

Woman: “See! He just did it again. Get him out of here before he attacks my dog and everyone else here.”

Me: “Ma’am, that’s called snoring. He’s sound asleep.”

How Do You Like Dem Apple Pies?

, , , , | Right | August 2, 2016

(I work at a very popular fast food chain. This happens around 10:30 pm. I am working the drive-thru window.)

Me: “Welcome to [Restaurant]! How may I help you?”

Customer: “I would like to order two apple pies, please.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but we only have one apple pie left for the night. Is there anything else you would like along with that pie?”

Customer: “How much is one pie?”

Me: “Eighty-nine cents.”

Customer: “Aren’t they two for a dollar?”

Me: “It’s $1.19, actually. Plus tax, it’s $1.27.”

Customer: “You can just sell me that pie for fifty cents then.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I’m not allowed to do that.”

Customer: “Well, it’s not my d*** fault you idiots don’t have stuff prepared for customers like you should, so I should get the pie for half the price.”

Me: “Ma’am, I am sorry, but I cannot give-”

Customer: “Stop talking and listen! I’m offering to pay for the d*** thing, so you’re not GIVING me anything!”

(By this time, I’m fed up and I decide to tell my manager about it. While I am explaining what is happening to my manager, the woman is still cussing into my headset. My manager has on a headset as well, so she hears the whole thing. Right as she is about to intervene, the woman blows up completely.)

Customer: “You know what? F*** this s***! F*** this company and f*** you! I will file a complaint on your a** and have you fired, you stupid f****** b****!”

Me: *turns headset back on* “Oh, please do, ma’am. You’ll be doing me the biggest favor.”

(The woman drove off, but she never filed a complaint and I still have my job. I always make sure we have a few apple pies left over towards the night in case I ever have to encounter someone as stupid as her again.)