I work at a mobile phone store in a mall. While it has its fair share of snippy customers, this job doesn’t require us to bend over backward for them. I was told from day one that we don’t have to take abuse and can shut everything down, kick them out, and/or call security.

A guy comes in to pick up his phone that was sent off to be repaired. I give him his phone, he gives back the loaner phone, and he leaves. I factory wipe the phone, as policy, and then put it back out in the cupboards.

About thirty minutes later, he calls, flipping out because his contacts were erased from his phone.

Customer: “My contacts aren’t in my phone. Where the h*** are they?”

Me: “Well, when your phone is sent out for repair, the service centre wipes your phone, which is why we tell people to back up their contacts.”

Customer: “I didn’t agree to have my phone wiped, and no one told me that!”

Me: “Actually, when you give us the phone to be sent away, you’re agreeing to just that. It’s even on the paper you signed before we ever sent it to repairs. In fact…”

I dig up the store copy.

Me: “…I am looking at your signature and date acknowledging that you know that backing up your contacts is your responsibility.”

Customer: “I had hundreds of contacts on that phone! Are they still on the loaner?”

Me: “No, I factory cleared it, as policy. Sorry.”

Customer: “I didn’t agree to that, either! Get me a manager. You just lost me millions of dollars!”

I give the phone to my coworker, since the manager isn’t here. She basically reiterates what I said. The customer then screams that someone’s getting fired over this, and my coworker slams the phone down.

About thirty minutes later, the customer comes in, throws a phone across the counter at me — it doesn’t hit me, but it’s done in a hostile type of way — and demands that I transfer his contacts over.

I can’t do it because the phone he wants me to do the transfer from is ancient.

He starts flipping out and screaming, calling us all sorts of names, and causing a scene.

Coworker: “Mister, you either calm the h*** down, or I’ll have you removed by security.”

Customer: “Don’t f****** bulls*** me! Do it. Do it! Call security, c***! And while you’re at it, get me the motherf****** manager, because you’re both losing your jobs now!”

I pick up the phone and dial. The other end is barely picked up with “Mall Secur—” when the man spews forth a long stream of (often repeated) swear words and verbal abuse at top volume.

Me: “[Store], please.”

I will admit, I’ve never seen three linebacker-sized security officers sprint into our store at that speed before.

The man was eventually removed and even banned from the mall entirely! They had to threaten to get the cops over before he would leave, but he’s banned nonetheless. As they were walking out of the mall, he was still screaming about his lost millions.

He called about four more times that day, pretending to be other people who “witnessed” this event, and every time he did it, he was told to basically f*** off and don’t call back. There had been only one other guy in store at the time, and I know it wasn’t him.

I am a general manager at a fast-casual sandwich place that also serves soup, pizza, and pasta. I am only twenty-four and have somehow gotten the general manager job.

We’re in a small town, and a lot of people know the owner. He has five [Sandwich Shop]s in the area, but one is his pride and joy. I’m still not sure why, but this one has the brand-new oven with four different conveyor belts that you can change speeds on if you need to do catering or something, while my store has two conveyors, one of which is broken half the time. They are given the nice soup bowls that are normal glassware for people who want to eat in store, as well as a couple of other things that just make life easier for them.

One of my employees comes over.

Employee: “I have a customer who’s very unhappy that she was given a to-go soup bowl when she told us she was eating here. I tried to explain to her that we have only been given to-go bowls, but she wasn’t having it. She started belittling me and then demanded to see a manager.”

The owner is one of those guys who act like anyone except for the general manager and assistant general manager are idiots. He evens call them “the hourlies” which I also think is weird. So, unfortunately, I can’t just go up and tell this lady off; I have to talk to her until she gets testy with me.

Me: “Hello, ma’am. I’m the general manager. What seems to be the matter?”

At first, she starts laughing.

Customer: *To her friend* “Look! The idiot employee went and got a friend so won’t get in trouble for lying.” *To me* “I want a manager, not some idiot—”

But then, she stops when she sees my name tag. She goes into this rant.

Customer: “Your employee lied to us about not having bowls! You probably just haven’t washed them because you’re all lazy!”

Me: “We don’t have regular bowls, ma’am. Our owner hasn’t given us any.”

That doesn’t go over well.

Customer: “I go to [Other Location] all the time, and I know it’s the same owner! I know you’re lying!”

She starts getting snippy with me, cutting me off when I try to say anything. Eventually, I am able to cut in.

Me: “Ma’am, the owner only gave bowls to that particular store and has not given them to any other store. If you want a real bowl, you’ll have to go there.”

Customer: “I know the owner, and he wouldn’t do that! You’re just lying because you’re an idiot. You only work here because you’re a loser. If you were intelligent and knew what was good for you, you’d go get me the right bowl!”

Finally, I have had enough.

Me: “If you know the owner, then you should tell them that we need those bowls to avoid dealing with people like you. I have put up with your disrespect enough. You need to leave. And you won’t have to worry about our bowls anymore because I will not serve you anymore. You can go to the other store from now on.”

She is stunned. She turns to a gentleman right next to her.

Customer: “Can you believe today’s youth? They are so disrespectful and need to be put in their place!”

The guy looks her dead in the eye.

Guy: “This manager put up with more than I would have. You’re the one who needs to be put in your place.”

She stormed out, threatening to get me fired, and I gave that guy a coupon for a free meal.

I interviewed a guy who looked good on paper, but in the interview, he came across as very full of himself. According to him, he was the best of class and best in his department. He boasted about what books he read, and all his interests were very pretentious. Generally, he didn’t seem very likable and or like a great fit for the team.

That being said, it wasn’t enough to rule him out completely. He got through the interview and seemed to answer most of the questions okay, and at the end, we asked him if he had any questions.

Applicant: “What are these values you mentioned earlier?”

Me: “Oh, they are the corporate values, integrity, teamwork, and acceptance of others.”

Applicant: “So, do you believe in them?”

Me: “Well, yes, the company follows a set of values in how we work and treat others.”

Applicant: “But do you believe in them?”

Me: *Pause* “Yes, we all believe in them, and we encourage others to do so. Was there a particular value you had a concern with?”

He thought for a moment.

Applicant: “Well, no. All of them really. I mean, it all sounds like a load of hippy, religious BS to me.”

Me: “I don’t think any of the values in any way—”

He cut me off.

Applicant: “I mean, if I don’t believe in all that, do I have to follow them?”

Me: “You don’t want to show integrity or value other people?”

Applicant: “I don’t mean that. I just don’t want some cry-baby complaining because I ‘offended’ them.”

He actually did the air quotes.

Me: “Well, yes, we do expect everyone to follow the values the company holds.”

He seems to think for a moment.

Applicant: “Well, that’s not very fair, is it?”

I hurried along the rest of the interview. It was pretty clear that he wouldn’t be a good fit. I sent him the rejection email, but it was my coworker who got the phone call from the guy, who shouted down the phone about how he was the right person for the job and how we were all stupid and prejudiced for not realising how brilliant he was. He called three more times — luckily, he was sent to voicemail — to shout at us and tell us how brilliant he was.

Funnily enough, that wasn’t enough to change our minds.

A very old man comes into the barbershop.

Customer: “I need a haircut now.”

Barber: “I’ll be with you after I am done with this customer.”

Customer: “No, see me now. Kick that guy out of your chair, I shouldn’t have to wait!”

Barber: “You want me to stop this guy mid-haircut? Why should I?”

Customer: “Because I might die!”

To say [Coworker] has a sweet tooth would be a massive understatement. She always has sweets on her desk and I’ve seen her eat cake for breakfast more than once.

The problem is that she has since adopted the “crazy cake lady” persona, as she puts it.

She uses this to justify helping herself to whatever is around, whenever she pleases. I have to keep anything I want for myself in my desk. It’s ridiculous how this has become “normal” in the office.

I haven’t seen [Coworker] all day, so I take my chance and tuck into some amazing lemon drizzle cake at my desk. I’m barely on my third forkful when she appears. I slump down to try and hide. But as two people have already complimented it, I know the lemon smell carries and she will be over soon. I feel the uncomfortable awkwardness already.

Coworker: “Oh, I can smell something sweet. Come on! Who brought in the goodies?”

She starts looking around, making exaggerated shrugging, and then whining at others.

Coworker: “Aha!”

I actually jump.

Coworker: “You can’t hide from the cake lady. What is that, lemon cake?”

Me: “Yes, actually, it’s from my husb—”

Coworker: *Sharply* “Well, come on, then! Who brought it in? Where is it?”

Me: “Actually, I brought this piece in, and I—”

Coworker: “And where is it, then? Come on, my break is nearly over. “

Me: “And there is only one piece; it’s all that’s left. Honest.”

Coworker: *Disgusted* “How can you bring in one piece, when all of your coworkers would want some?! That’s… that’s so selfish.”

Me: “[Coworker], it’s leftovers. It’s hardly a slice.”

Coworker: “We share things in the office. You don’t just bring in a slice!”

Coworker #2: “Leave her alone, [Coworker]!”

Coworker: “I thought better of you!”

I admit that was intense! I complained, but our bosses laughed it off. “It was only cake,” and, “You know how [Coworker] gets.”

When they told me to just bring in an extra piece, I complained to Human Resources. They only took me seriously after I had another coworker back me up.

[Coworker] was disciplined but didn’t change, but small victories: we learnt that [Coworker] doesn’t like coffee cake — my favourite! Whenever she is really annoying me I bake a fresh one for everyone to share. Petty? Sure, but it is also fun.