Those Hoodlums Just Love To Steal The Flannels

, , , | Right | February 23, 2021

I used to work at a craft store but left to work at another company. I’m still friends with a lot of the employees and still do sewing projects, so I’m in often. I also have several piercings and two full-sleeve tattoos.

I’m talking with a friend while they’re cutting my fabric and a customer storms over.

Customer: “Oh, just move her s*** and serve me! She’s just gonna steal all of this, anyway!”

Friend: “Ma’am, you need to wait.”

Customer: “No, I don’t! She’s just some punk b****!”

I just look at this woman making a scene in public.

Friend: “Ma’am, I’m gonna call my manager.”

Customer: “JUST CUT MY D*** FABRIC!”

She suddenly yanks what I’ve had cut already off the counter and throws it on the floor. She slams her bolts down, barely missing my hand.

Friend: “Yeah, no.”

She calls the manager. When the manager arrives, the customer glares at me.

Customer: “This b**** is just trying to get me banned! I want her out!”

The manager laughs.

Manager: “Her? I doubt it. She’s never caused trouble here before. You, on the other hand, have. Every single time you’re in.”

Customer: “But… she’s gonna steal! That’s all these punk kids do!”

Me: “Ma’am, if you’re gonna judge on appearance, then expect to be wrong.”


Manager: “All right, I’ve had enough. I’m asking you to leave.”


Manager: “You’re harassing a customer, you’ve made it a habit, and you’re causing a scene in the store. Leave.”

After yelling about how I am a thief, she finally leaves. The manager looks back at me.

Manager: “[My Name], I’m giving you half off of your total… as long as you don’t steal.”

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Some People Shouldn’t Be Allowed To Reproduce

, , , , , | Right | February 23, 2021

I work at a small fast food restaurant in an area that is unsafe to be in after 8:00 pm. There is no play area for kids and the dining room is closed at 8:00 pm.

A lady in an oversized coat with fur linings comes in at 7:00 pm with four kids. The oldest looks about seven while the youngest looks about five. The lady orders a large order totalling about $50, and then takes the order to a back table that has charging ports. Then, she leaves; the kids don’t seem to care as they are watching a movie on a laptop.

At 7:30 pm, the mum hasn’t come back. I tell my shift supervisor, who asks the kids if they have their mum’s number. They don’t have her number, so my supervisor calls the police to take care of the kids and then asks me to keep an eye on them.

While we’re waiting for the police, an older man that seems out of it approaches the kids and starts asking them questions.

Older Man: “Where are Mummy and Daddy?”

Older Man: “Do your Mummy and Daddy hate you so much that they left you here?”

Older Man: “Would you like to get a ride with me? Or you can stay at my place?”

Luckily, the police arrive before things get out of control and take the kids with them. I think that will be the end of it.

At 10:00 pm, someone starts screaming and trying to break down the door. My supervisor sees that it is the lady from before. He lets her in and she goes straight for the table where she left her kids. When she realises that her kids aren’t there, she storms up to the front counter.


Supervisor: *Very calmly* “With all due respect, you left your kids here with no adults and no way to contact you. I called the police as it’s not my job to make sure that your kids are safe. Here is the number for the officer that is watching your kids; she is waiting for you so you can have a lesson on how to look after your kids.”

The lady turned a deep shade of purple. She stormed out, and that was the last we saw of her.

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Dang, Even The Bookworms Are Doing The Tobacco Now!

, , , , | Right | February 23, 2021

I’m a gas station clerk. A young man comes to the counter and puts down his things, including a high school library book clearly stamped with “[Local High School] Library.” In other words, this kid is probably underage.

He has a non-alcoholic beverage and, after I ring him up, he decides to try to sneak one past me.

Young Man: “Can I also get [tobacco product]?”

Me: “Can I see your ID?”

He pretends to search his wallet for his identification and, after a moment, mutters:

Young Man: “I must have left it in my other wallet.”

I nod.

Me: “It happens to me all the time.”

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Please Don’t Shoot Your Shot

, , , | Working | February 22, 2021

I have worked in an Indiana college town in a 147-room hotel for about six months. Most of the time things go swimmingly, but the last couple of nights have been doozies thanks to our boilers going AWOL, leaving the hotel without hot water. This left two wedding suites unable to shower comfortably. But that wasn’t the most interesting thing to happen this week. No, that would be tonight.

Around 9:15, someone walks into the hotel and asks for public restrooms. I eye the person, whose appearance and demeanor fit that of the local drug addict population.

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t have public restrooms.”

Guy: *Barely above a whisper* “I’ll take a room, then.”

This is red flag number one. Normally, people just grumble and walk out. They don’t suddenly switch to wanting to pay $150 for a room. But I click a few buttons on my system and fake looking for rooms.

Me: “I’ll need a credit card and a photo ID.”

The guy pulls out a green BMV-issued ID card — not a license, just an ID card — and a debit card. While we can take debit cards, I’m still suspicious. It is at this point that I notice that the guy’s left hand is covered in fresh blood.

Guy: “I’ll pay for anything, even a suite.”

This is red flag number two. To go from wanting bathrooms to wanting to pay for anything we had just screams, “I’m a junkie and I’m looking for a place to shoot up.” I decide to refuse service for a few reasons: one, there’s no sense in risking him overdosing on whatever his poison of choice is and having a dead-in-room situation; two, there are two weddings in house tonight; and three, there are a lot of kids in house.

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we’re completely sold out.”

This was a blatant lie; we were only at 54% for the night, but I was certain he was looking for a place to shoot up and was going to do whatever it took to do so.

The guy turned around and walked out. My manager, after hearing this, told me I’d done a good job and the night went on as usual. This was a first for me. Feels like I got through a rite of passage for hospitality or something.

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The Sweet Smell Of Jasmine And Mary Jane

, , , , | Right | February 22, 2021

I am helping train new folks. One day, I am sitting with a girl we will call Sophie and I have my headset plugged into hers so I can listen to her calls and give her feedback and help with answers she doesn’t know. 

Sophie: “Thank you for calling [Bank]. This is Sophie. May I have your name?”

Customer: “Hi, Jasmine, I’m [Customer], I’m locked out of my app.”

Sophie is confused about being called Jasmine but presses forward.

Sophie: “For verification purposes, could you confirm the amount of a recent transaction?”

Customer: “Oh. Um. Uh… Oh! I did a sixteen-dollar transfer to my friend — six for the sandwich and ten for the ounce of pot.”

Sophie gives me a startled look as I try to process that the dude just said that to his BANK.

Customer: “Oh, s***! Jasmine! Jasmine I’m sorry, please don’t turn me in Jasmine!”

Sophie does manage to get his online banking unlocked, with him begging “Jasmine” not to call the cops the whole time. Meanwhile, I am trying very hard not to laugh. Once the call is over, Sophie looks at me.

Sophie: “Uh… should we… do something with that?”

Me: “To be honest, I genuinely don’t know; having a customer tell their bank about their drug deal is new to me. You handled it well. Go ahead and keep taking calls while I check with the leads to see if we need to pursue this.”

They were just as entertained as I was, and none of them seemed to be concerned with reporting it. We all had a good chuckle at the ridiculousness of it all, and to this day I still say, “Don’t turn me in, Jasmine!” to mean, “The customers are at it again.”

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