Hungry For Some Justice

, , , , , , , | Related | January 5, 2018

(I have an older in-law who is a big time user; she tries to con everyone she can. Her big thing right now is trying to con everyone into taking her out for a steak dinner. Not a quick fast food meal; she wants a big, expensive meal with appetizers and the works. She will pull the, “Oh, I have never been to a nice restaurant,” and puppy-dog eyes routine, whining and begging. It never works with me. We have just moved into a new home with a two-month-old baby. The power has not been turned on yet so I have family who lend me a cooler and fill it with sandwich meat and leftovers from when we had dinner at their house the night before. I am cleaning and the elderly in-law is visiting with another in-law who is outside helping my husband build a deck. She speaks to me in her fake Southern accent.)

In-Law: “Oh, dear, my dinner bell is going off.”

(I am not stupid, and I am not playing that game. I tell her I had some sandwich meat and I could make her something.)

In-Law: “Oh, I don’t like sandwiches, dear.”

Me: “Okay, well, I have some leftovers from my mother’s house you are welcome to have.”

In-Law: “Oh, I don’t do leftovers, dear.”

Me: “Well, then I guess you’re not hungry… DEAR.”

(She had the look of deer in headlights on her face. She made an insulted face, got up, and walked out of the house. She did not return until over ten years later. Several other in-laws told me if they knew that that was all it took to get rid of her for a decade they would have done the same thing.)

Have To Be Tough To Deal With Holiday Shoppers

, , , , , | Right | January 5, 2018

(It’s about seven pm on Thanksgiving night. A customer approaches my register with a cart of college t-shirts. As I ring them up and say the price ($4.99) she stops me.)

Customer: “Excuse me! Those are 50% off!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. They are ticketed $10 and the sign says 50% off the ticketed price. That is why they are $4.99.”

Customer: “I don’t think so. They should be 50% off the price on the sign! I want to go look!”

(She walks over to the section and storms back to my register.)

Customer: “Scan all of them! I don’t believe you!”

(I scan all 20 of them one by one, each coming up $4.99.)

Customer: “Here, I don’t want these few.”

(She throws about five onto the register and I hastily put them to the side.)

Customer: “Ring me up for the rest of these.”

(I’m very flustered at this point. I’m still new to the job, and I take an audible deep breath.)

Customer: “Are you getting annoyed with me?”

Me: “No, ma’am, I’m just very flustered; it is Thanksgiving night, it has been very busy, and I only started a few weeks ago.”

Customer: “Well, tough s***! It’s your job to be annoyed. And you can’t do anything about it.”

(I rang her up in silence, completely baffled by her attitude. She left and I had to walk away from the register, it was so upsetting.)

Never Shopping Here, Starting Tomorrow!

, , , , | Right | January 5, 2018

(It is a quiet Saturday afternoon, a few weeks before Father’s Day. I work in the men’s department so my register is supposed to get boxes for customers, but they haven’t come yet. A woman approaches my register with at least four big bags of already purchased items.)

Customer: “Do you have any boxes down here so I can get stuff wrapped?”

Me: “No, unfortunately, but they do have them upstairs at customer service.”

Customer: *in disgust* “UGH! How ridiculous! Such horrible service! This is why I never shop here!”

(She walked out of the store and I chuckled to myself. How was it that she had four bags of items if she ‘never shops here’?)

An Unbelievable Amount Of Believability

, , , , , , , , | Learning | January 5, 2018

(My history teacher senior year has been funny and easy-going all year. It’s two months until graduation, and he is starting to get tired of the “senioritis” going around.)

Teacher: “From now on, if I see a cell phone out, I am collecting it in this box. And once a week, I will choose one cell phone out of the box and smash it against the wall!”

(About a week goes by as normal. Then, one day, in the middle of watching a movie, the teacher turns it off.)

Teacher: “I have had enough of this! I have told, and told, and told this class. I am sick of telling this class that I do not want to see your phones out. I’m done.” *picks up the box from his desk* “Phones. In this box. Now.”

(He goes around the room, and everyone who has their phone out puts it in the box.)

Teacher: *getting back to his desk* “Are you finding this funny? Would you find it even funnier if I just dumped these in the garbage can?” *picks up a phone and holds it over the garbage can* “Would that just make your day?”

Student #1: “You won’t do it!”

Teacher: “Won’t I?”

Student #2: “You won’t do it!”

Teacher: “I could just take these and start throwing them in here. Would that be funny to you?”

Student #1: “Well, you’re not going to do it, so…”

(Instead of dropping the phone, the teacher spins around and flings it at the wall. It breaks and falls to the floor in pieces.)

Teacher: “Was that funny?”

Student #1: “Dude, that was my phone!”

Teacher: “Did you find that amusing?”

Student #1: “You broke my phone, you a**hole!”

Teacher: “Get out! Get out of this classroom, now! Just get out of my sight!”

Student #1: “I don’t want to be here, anyway!”

(He runs out of the room and slams the door. Everything is completely silent for a moment.)

Teacher: “[Student #3], would you come here a minute?”

Student #3: *does so, looking confused because he’s been cooperative this whole time*

Teacher: “Remember back in September when I told you I could get you to believe something completely unbelievable?”

(By now the teacher was grinning like a fool. The student who left came back into the room, also grinning. He was in on it, as was another student who brought in an old cell phone for use in the prank. After explaining this, the teacher didn’t go back to teaching, but let us talk for the rest of the class. I guess he was having some “end of year fever,” too!)

Cart That Employee Back To Training

, , , , , , | Working | January 5, 2018

(I am nine months pregnant. My doctor has recommended that I not spend extended periods of time on my feet. I really need to do some grocery shopping, so I go to the customer service desk to see if they have a motorized cart available. The customer service associate is a middle-aged man.)

Me: “Hi, excuse me. Do you have any motorized carts available?”

Worker #1: “No.”

Me: “Oh, okay. Have they all been taken recently? Do you think one will be available soon?”

Worker #1: “Not for you.”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Worker #1: “There’s nothing wrong with you; you’ve got two legs that aren’t broken. Go get a normal cart.”

Me: “My doctor has told me it isn’t safe for me to walk around too much. I really need to buy groceries. If there won’t be a cart available soon, I will come back later, but I don’t think it’s appropriate for you to talk to a customer that way.”

Worker #1: “You can come back later, but I’m still not giving you a cart. You can walk; you’re just lazy.”

(At this point, I’ve had enough. I walk over to another employee.)

Me: “Is your manager around?”

Worker #2: “Yeah, hang on.” *she calls the manager over*

Manager: “Hi! How’s it going?”

Me: “Oh, great. I’m just a little upset because your customer service person won’t let me use a motorized cart.” *the manager looks at my obvious belly and turns white*

Manager: “Jesus! Again?!”

(The manager went to the desk and came back with a motorized cart and a gift card. I could hear the customer service worker shouting about how I was not disabled and didn’t deserve the cart. It turned out, he had done this to several other customers before me, all young people.)

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