Even The Burgers Are Hiding From Her

, , , | Right | September 7, 2018

(My store does a service where people order online, and an employee shops it for them to pick up later. I had just started my first order of the day and am grabbing some items from the frozen section when a customer comes up to me.)

Customer: “Hi, do you know where the [Brand] burgers are?”

Me: “Sorry, I don’t know exactly where they are, but they should be somewhere either in this aisle or a couple aisles over. I know that most of our burgers are in the freezer at the end of the aisle.”

Customer: “Well I just came from [Other Store] and they didn’t have them!”

Me: “I’m sorry. I don’t know if we even have them, but they would probably be with the other burgers if we have them.”

Customer: *getting annoyed* “Don’t you work in frozen?”

Me: “No, I go around the entire store shopping items for people who order online, so I don’t know any specific part of the store too well; I’m sorry again.”

Customer: “Can you find them for me?”

Me: “I can look around the aisle for you and let you know if I see what you’re looking for, but I can’t guarantee that we have them.”

Customer: “Then why do you even work here?!”

(The customer then walked off and started complaining about me to her husband. Poor guy seemed to have had to deal with that attitude far too much. I ran into her one more time in the store and she just sneered at me.)

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No Point Crying Over Soyed Milk

, , , , | Right | September 6, 2018

(I worked for a few years in the college dining services. Most of my job was to be a cashier or server at the dorm’s dining commons. I lived in the dorms so the residents knew who I was and would be friendly to me. But one night I was approached by a guest who was brought in to eat with her friend.)

Customer: “Hey, so I got this cereal, and I want to put milk on it, but I don’t know which one since I’m lactose intolerant.”

Me: “Oh, well, if you’re using the machine next to the soda fountain, you wouldn’t be able to use either because—”

Customer: “This is cereal. I have to put SOMETHING on it and not water. Besides – I don’t know for sure if I am lactose intolerant but I don’t want to find out the hard way you know?”

Me: “Ma’am, I understand that you feel that way. However, the only milks in that machine are whole milk and chocolate milk. If you are indeed lactose intolerant, you’d need soy milk, which we have in the back. Would you like me to get that for you?”

(The customer walks off in a huff, shouting to her friends:)

Customer: “See? I told you this b**** doesn’t know anything!”

(She approaches my coworkers to ask for the manager to make a complaint about the b**** (me) and meanwhile I’m sitting at my post dealing with other customers. My manager approaches me some time later:)

Manager: “Were you approached by a customer about milk?”

Me: “Yes, why?”

Manager: “She told me that you were being b****y to her and didn’t give her what she needed.”

(I tell my manager in detail my side of the story. She nods as I do.)

Manager: “Did you tell her we had soy milk in the back?”

(I nod.)

Manager: “Well, then why is she making a fuss over this? You gave her the answer she was looking for!”

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This Cousin Deserves To Be Boxed

, , , , | Related | September 6, 2018

(My grandmother is moving and the whole family is helping out. My dad asks his boss if he can borrow a few sturdy boxes, and it is approved, as long as the boxes get returned. One day, we return to the now empty house.)

Dad: “Has anyone seen my boxes?”

Cousin #1: “Oh, I tossed them out.”

Me, Sister, Cousin #2 & Dad: “TOSSED THEM OUT?!”

Sister: “We all knew these boxes had to return to my dad.”

Cousin #1: “Hey, I was busy! I have a lot of things on my mind! You know, I had to do everything on my own, and nobody helped!”

Dad: “Actually, we all offered to help multiple times, and you insisted on doing this on your own. Now what? My boss won’t accept, ‘Sorry.'”

Cousin #1: “You know, it’s always something with this family! How else did I have to move those books?”

Dad: “Use one of those other boxes, like the ones over there?! Or take them out?”

Cousin #1: “I’ve had it with this family. You guys always attack me. I’m out of here!”

(My cousin left. Meanwhile, Grandmother kept on asking where certain valuable things went. We don’t have any proof, but we think we know who took them, to sell at a black market. My cousin doesn’t have a job — and couldn’t keep one even if his life depended on it — and doesn’t live on welfare, but he keeps on posting pictures on Facebook of his new car every few months. We’ll have to keep this silent for Grandmother, though. She thinks her grandson had a rough past but is doing great now. Telling her of this would not be good for her heart.)

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Laying Out To Her In Black And White

, , , , | Right | September 6, 2018

(I’m working the fitting room when a middle-aged woman calls.)

Customer: “I bought a black and white, three-quarter-length dress, and YOU guys left it in the store!”

Me: “Let me see what I can do for you.”

(I radio my manager, who tells me there’s nothing up front that matches the woman’s description. He then feeds me information to relay to her.)

Me: “I’m very sorry, ma’am, but it’s not up-front anymore. If you could come in with your receipt, we’d be more than happy to—”

Customer: “I KNOW I bought it! I bought it at exactly 3:47 today!”

Me: “Ma’am, we cannot refund you or get you your dress over the pho—”

Customer: “Get me your manager.”

(I did as told, wondering if this woman thought we had a delivery service or could fax her the dress or what, and also how it could possibly be our fault that she left her purchase at the register. It wasn’t until we’re getting ready to close that I learned that my manager had gone through security footage and found she had the garment when she left. She then called back while I was on break — apparently it had fallen on her closet floor.)

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Waffling On All Night

, , , , , | Right | September 6, 2018

(I am working an overnight shift at a very popular 24/7 mainly breakfast diner in Georgia. Our specialty is in the name of the restaurant. It is around 2:00 am and it is dead. We have one table who has already paid and is just hanging out, which we don’t mind when its dead. I’m just about to go outside for a smoke break when the phone rings.)

Me: *to coworker* “I got it! Thank you for calling [Diner]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Uh, yeah. Do y’all sell coffee?”

Me: “Yes, we sure do. We have decaf, regular, and dark roast.”

Customer: “Do y’all sell eggs?”

Me: “Yes… we do. You can order them to be made any way you like, or add them to any sandwich for extra.”

Customer: “Do y’all sell waffles?”

(I’m slightly annoyed at this point. More people have come in. This person doesn’t seem like they are going to order anything and it’s obvious that we sell waffles because it’s in the name of the diner.)

Me: “Yes, we do. You can get chocolate, peanut butter, or pecan.”

Customer: *giggling* “Wow. You really sell waffles?”

Me: *finally losing my patience* “Yes, that’s why it’s called [Diner].”

Customer: “Rude!” *click*

(They called two more times that night. My coworkers (server and grill operator) took turns answering. After they hassled the other server, they called back. The grill operator ended up telling them that if they didn’t want to order anything, they needed to f*** off and stop calling.)

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