How To Confuse A Retail Worker: Be Nice

, , , , | Right | February 12, 2019

(I’m shopping for clothes at a popular superstore. I’ve just tried on a few items, and all but one of them fit. The dressing room attendant sees me coming out of the dressing room with an armful of clothes and meets me at the counter.)

Attendant: “How’d it go? Anything you’re thinking about keeping?”

Me: “Yeah! Most of them were good, but the jacket was a little tight, so I think that one’s going to go back.”

Attendant: *reaching for the jacket* “I’ll take that one, then!”

Me: “Oh, don’t worry about it. It’s just on that rack—“ *points to a nearby display* “—over there, so I can go hang it up for you.”

(Another attendant has returned to grab more go-backs, and sees me put the jacket back in the correct spot on the display.)

Attendant: *shocked face* “Oh, um, okay? Thank you? I don’t… What?”

Second Attendant: “Hey! I like you! You should shop here more often!”

Me: “I used to work in retail; I’ve done my fair share of go-backs!”

Second Attendant: “Ah, that explains why you’re treating us like human beings, instead of robots designed to pick up clothes!”

Attendant: “Thank you!”

(It’s not that hard to be nice to retail workers, folks. A little kindness goes a long way!)

One Day Someone Will Give Him A Knuckle Sandwich

, , , , , | Right | February 8, 2019

(I walk into a local [Sandwich Shop], a very small location with only one employee working the counter at a time. There is one customer already in front of me, who is ordering for his family, and I can clearly see that this guy is already agitated. He’s pacing around the store, barely looking at the employee, and barking orders at her while he asks his family what they want. Being in food service, as well, that already gets my dander up, because I HATE those kinds of people. But the tiny girl behind the counter is doing the best she can, being genial and polite to this gentleman, and getting his sandwiches for him. But all of a sudden, out of the blue, he just starts going off.)

Customer: “Excuse me. What is that look for?”

(This girl has not changed her expression the entire time. When he speaks to her about this, she is clearly confused.)

Employee: “I’m sorry… What?”

Customer: “You’re giving me some look. Do we have a problem?”

Employee: *still politely* “No, sir, we don’t have a problem.”

(The employee then turns to get his second sandwich from the toaster and he seems to leave it like that. But as soon as she turns around to ask him what he wants on the second sandwich, he goes off again.)

Customer: “Look. Clearly, you have a problem with me. I see it in your look. What did you say to me? Why are you being rude?”

Employee: *still polite as she can, but she is now getting a little upset* “Sir, I don’t have any look! I haven’t said anything to you!”

(I’ve had it with the guy, and since he keeps insisting she is being rude and giving him nasty looks, I finally cut in.)

Me: “Sir, I’ve been watching the whole time and this girl is doing fine. Her expression has not changed, and she is only asking what you want for toppings. Just order your sandwich and leave her alone!”

(I want to say more, but since his daughter is sitting right there, I don’t want to swear at him and show him what it is REALLY like for someone to be rude to him. Once the customer sees me jump to the employee’s aid, however, he finally shuts up after muttering to himself.)

Customer: “Okay, okay, fine… Jesus Christ…”

(He said nothing more after that, paying for his sandwiches and sitting down to eat. When it was my turn I made it a point to be clear and exceedingly polite when placing my order, just to rub it in what a d**k he was. When I got to the counter, the employee said it was on the house and was clearly grateful that I’d stepped in. I still sat near the counter while the guy was there, just in case he tried to harass the girl again. I’m so sick of people who think it’s okay to harass food workers.)

Make A Point To Point Out Those Easy To Appoint

, , , | Right | January 24, 2019

(I am a patient, calling my doctor’s office to schedule an appointment for some blood work that is not an emergency.)

Me: “I’m out of work on weekdays by 3:00 pm, so any weekday appointment at 3:30 pm or later on any day in the next few weeks would be fine with me.”

Receptionist: “Okay, how about Wednesday the 19th at 3:30 pm?”

Me: “Works for me, I’ll put it on my calendar. Thanks for your help.”

Receptionist: “Wait. That’s it? That’s really okay? That was so easy. You’re sure you want that date?”

Me: *laughing* “It’s absolutely fine. I used to work in customer service. I will see you on Wednesday the 19th at 3:30 pm.”

This Greek Cup Is Definitely Half Full

, , , | Right | January 22, 2019

(I run my own cleaning firm. My cleaner and I are in a client’s house performing his regular clean. The client is not present. My cleaner accidentally breaks a Greek souvenir espresso cup which holds a spoon. Our policy on breakage is that we will replace any items broken. We are also fully insured. I text my client explaining the situation, and I apologise and offer to replace the item. Meanwhile, my cleaner is panicking.)

Me: “Hi, [Client]. I’m afraid that [Cleaner] had a little accident with one your Greek souvenir cups. If you can look up a replacement for it, we will pay for it to be replaced. We apologise for the accident.”

Client: “It’s really not a problem.”

Me: “Are you sure?”

Client: “Yeah, I hate that thing!”

(My cleaner had never looked so relieved in her life! Bless her!)

There’s Nothing Cats And Dogs Can’t Make Better

, , , , , , , | Hopeless | January 21, 2019

I have worked over two years for a well-known UK supermarket delivering groceries to customers at home. Over these last two years, I’ve gone from positive and energetic about my job to somewhat sad and jaded. This does not mean I don’t do my best work; it just means that I have lost a lot of enthusiasm for the work itself and the good bits are outweighed by the bad bits now.

But today was a good day. First off, I want to say that if you are getting a grocery delivery, generally, keeping your pets locked away is helpful, since not everyone likes cats and dogs and may even have allergies. But I love cats and dogs, and I don’t have allergies!

My third delivery of the morning came with instructions, “We have dogs and cats; they are friendly.” I greeted the customer, who invited me inside, and the dogs came rushing up past their owner to greet the strange new human in their home. There were tails wagging and lots of excited pants. I greeted the dogs enthusiastically. The customer even invited me to stay for a few minutes to play with the dogs, and the cats, who, after a few minutes, decided to come and see what the fuss was about. In short, I was in fluffy heaven for five awesome minutes.

My run of good lucked followed with a later customer giving me a free latte. Another customer with pets that were happy to see me even gave me a generous tip for my work. Fun fact: the best tippers are always American. So, while I think I’m on the way out of this particular job, today reminded me that there are some really good aspects of my job!

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