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His Common Sense Got A Flat

, , , | Right | April 10, 2021

We own an auto repair garage. During a stormy and very wet August, a guy calls and says he has a flat, but he has enough air to bring it to our garage for a tire repair.

My husband puts it on the hoist and takes off the tire, looks at it for about a minute, and then looks at the other three tires still on the car.

Husband: “Yeah, I can’t repair this; the tire is too worn and won’t hold a repair.”

Customer: “Why not?”

My husband points to the bald tire with metal showing.

Husband: “One: it’s a hole on the sidewall. Two: this tire is completely bald and unsafe. And three: it was a rock that punctured it.”

Customer: “But I wanted to keep this set on until November and then switch to my winters!”

Husband: “All your tires are in the same shape; they’re all unsafe. You need a new set immediately.”

The guy didn’t want to replace the tire, and my husband wanted nothing to do with it. He didn’t even charge him, but he did warn that any fix was a temporary solution and it couldn’t be driven over a certain speed, etc.

Three weeks later, the guy was still driving on it and the other three bald tires.

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Scratch That, Just Report Everything

, , , | Right | CREDIT: Moosetastical | March 22, 2021

I work as an hourly technician. We have a repeat customer that comes in for oil and tires. She is a real problem customer; she complains about anything out of place or smudged on her car.

Customer: “I want all four tires done!”

Service Manager: To me. “I want you to make an account of anything you find on her car before you start your service.”

I take four hours on her vehicle as she waits on an uncomfortable bench. I write up every smudge and scratch on the exterior of the vehicle. The final report is a ten-page manifesto on her car.

Funnily enough, she never returned.

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Making A Squeak About The Leak

, , , | Right | March 10, 2021

A woman comes into the auto shop where I work and she seems really upset.

Woman: “I was in here earlier for an oil change, and when I got home, it was leaking oil.”

I apologize and ask her for her info so I can pull up the work order. A few minutes later, I have her file pulled up and I am looking at the work order. The technician had placed a note on the work order that she had an oil leak when they brought it in.

Hoo boy, it’s going to be one of those days, isn’t it? I brace myself for the inevitable explosion and tell the woman that we had informed her about the oil leak before we changed her oil.

I did not brace in vain: she blows up on me. 

Woman: “My car never leaked oil until I got it home today!”

I look up previous work orders on her vehicle. She actually brought it in every time it was due for a change. I note this.

Woman: “Of course I come in on time!”

Me: “Most people don’t do that, and then they wonder why their vehicles break down so quickly! It’ll take me a minute to look over your files.”

Each work order for the past year shows technician comments about an oil leak. I tell the woman the news. She blows up at me again.

Woman: “It did not have an oil leak before today!”

Me: “Ma’am, we have paperwork covering an entire year’s inspections, and an oil leak is identified on all of them. It is also noted that we specifically told you about the leak.”

She refuses to listen. She begins telling me how horrible I am at my job and how I refuse to accept that I broke her car.

Me: “Ma’am, I did not do the work on the vehicle. I am just the cashier. Our technicians identified the problem.”

She still tells me how dumb I am, and I tell her that if she keeps it up, she can leave.

She demands to see my manager, of course. I go out to the shop and call in the manager. I print out the past year’s worth of work orders, and as he enters, I hand him the small stack. From there, it’s not my problem, so I walk away and stock the shelves. About three or four minutes pass, and I hear the woman shrieking at him, telling him how he sucks at his job and that he broke her car, and demanding to see the store manager.

Well, this is an issue, but not for us. Our store manager rarely comes out at a customer’s request as it is a very large store and he is VERY busy. He is an awesome guy, though. I call his office and let him know that we have a very irate customer claiming that we caused an oil leak in her car. He sighs and comes out.

The woman is yelling at him even as he’s still approaching, and the service manager just hands him the stack of paperwork. The store manager looks at it and asks the woman to wait for a minute. He goes into the manager’s office to review the paperwork without the woman shrieking in his ear.

A couple of minutes later, I get called over, and the store manager asks me what was going on. I tell him everything from the beginning. He nods and sends me on my way.

Store Manager: *Coming out of the office* “Ma’am, I have a stack of papers here, all of it from a year’s worth of service. Every sheet indicates that you were notified of an oil leak. Just to be certain I am understanding you, you are refusing to believe that you were at fault?”

Woman: “You all made my car leak oil!”

Store Manager: “All right, you apparently cannot understand that this is an issue that you’ve had, and you never saw to fixing, so I’m going to tell you how this is going to escalate. I am going to turn this over to our insurance company to handle. We, at that point, will no longer be dealing with this issue.”

She takes a huge breath and he holds up his hand.

Store Manager: “Do not start. Be quiet and listen. I want you to understand what’s going to happen. The insurance company will want all the paperwork on work you had done on your vehicle from us and will decide what to do from that point on. Here is what will happen. Not ‘might,’ not ‘maybe.’ It is what will happen. You will receive paperwork telling you to take it to a different mechanic. If you want your claim to be processed, you will do this. When that happens, you will be required to send the paperwork stating which mechanic you go to. Do you understand so far?”

She nods mutely.

Store Manager: “Good. Now, this separate shop will inspect and repair the car. They will be fully aware that the insurance company wants a thorough investigation. If the insurance company does deny your claim, you will be responsible for payment to the mechanic for the repair, and any fees they charge.”

The woman puffed up her chest like she’d already won, and she clearly thought she was going to get a free repair.

We have seen customer responses like this before, but it never, EVER ends well for the customer. We already know what the verdict will be: she will end up paying for the repair herself. The insurance company we use is very stingy. They do not fork over cash to make a problem go away. They have a history of being fully willing to spend that money on an investigation, rather than fork over money to someone looking to get a freebie… no matter how small or cheap. They’re so notorious for it in company circles that as soon as word comes along that they’re investigating a claim, most people toss paperwork in the air and go, “Well, we know how this is gonna end. Want some coffee or popcorn for the show?”

The woman didn’t know this. She strode out with her head held high and the store manager shook his head, handed me the paperwork, and went into his office. Minutes later, I got a call from the insurance agent asking me to have the paperwork faxed to them. Naturally, I sent the fax ASAP with a small smile on my face.

Time passed, and the insurance company replied to the claim, “Denied claim due to proof of poor upkeep on vehicle. Claimant was notified of leak for over one year of issue with leak, and never had it checked nor repaired.”

They would have called the woman with this verdict, as well. I am sure some words were said and conniption fits were thrown, but it’s no longer our problem.

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Confusion Has Hit The Sunroof

, , , , | Right | February 25, 2021

Customer: “I’m here for my 2:00 pm appointment for an oil change.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. When you’re finished, your total will be $28.16.”

Customer: “Can I add a note?”

Me: “Of course.”

Customer: “Can you ask them not to put the windows down? They won’t go back up. I left the sunroof open for access.”

Me: “I apologize, but access to what?”

Customer: “Just don’t put my windows down.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, but I’m not understanding the sunroof?”

Customer: *Grinning like I’m an idiot* “Thank you!”

Me: *Genuinely confused* “Ma’am, I understand not to put the windows down, but I don’t understand why we would need access through the sunroof. Is there an issue with the doors?”

Customer: *Same grin* “Thank you!” *Pauses* “Thank you!” *Pauses* “Thank you!”

Me: “All right, then.”

I then walk into the bay, because surely the tech knows something I don’t.

Tech: “She means that if we lock the keys in the car, we can get in through the sunroof, which ain’t happening, ‘cause I’m not climbing in through a sunroof.”

Me: “Why didn’t she just say that instead of acting like a dumba** about it?!”

Tech: *Shrugs*

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Will Have To Tighten Your (Seat)Belts

, , , , , | Right | February 19, 2021

I’m the proper idiot here. For reference, I have a Ph.D. but all the common sense of a potato.

My car seatbelt started sticking, so it usually takes a few attempts to pull it down to click in. I book my car in to get it fixed, and in the meantime, I stick some duct tape on the belt to stop it from retracting all the way. When I drop my car in to get it fixed, I think that the tape looks tatty, so I pull out my trusty pen knife to cut it off.

Yeah, it turns out that car seatbelts slice really easily. And they cost £130 to replace.

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