No Connecting Here

, , , , , , | Learning | May 26, 2021

I am starting the highest rope courses in camp. Being a rope course, there are many safety procedures, one of them being a partner system. There is one key fact: you must call to your partner each time you finish a course and switch to the next. This is where problems come in as I pair up with [Annoying Classmate]. As I climb up, I clip my safety connectors to the rope. First red flag:

Me: “Connecting!”

There is a response, but it is delayed and I can already see them talking to someone else.

Annoying Classmate: “Continue!”

I continue to climb through the sections, forgetting to call the second and third transitions. Finally, I remember to do so.

Me: “Connecting!”

Silence. I look down and where do I find them? Nowhere in sight. As there is only one area blocked from my view, I rightly assume that my classmate has gone under into the shade. I curse them in my mind and continue in the hopes that they’ll come out. Stupid, I know. As I reach the fifth one, I look down and see the exact same thing: no [Annoying Classmate].

Me: “Connecting!”

I pause.

Me: “CONNECTING!”

Still silence. I am very frustrated at this point.

Me: “CONNECTING, YOU FEMALE DOG!”

As this is the first time I’ve sworn in any capacity, this should be enough to get their attention even though it isn’t an actual swear. I know people down there can hear me because they look up with shocked faces, but no one emerges from the shade. At this point, someone else comes along with his own partner, [Classmate].

Classmate: “Continue, [My Name]!”

He continues to serve as my de-facto partner until the end, which I will be forever grateful for. Finally, as I descend, [Annoying Classmate] comes out of the shade towards me.

Annoying Classmate: “So, how was it?”

Thankfully, a murder did not happen that day.

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You Can Cut Your Hair But Not The Commentary

, , , , | Working | May 21, 2021

I’m a woman in my thirties with very short hair. The last few years, I’ve gotten super into buzz cuts and it’s been my choice of style since.

A few days ago, I decided my hair was getting too long — and by that, I mean that it’s really what most people consider “short” — so I went to a men’s barbershop that also does women’s hair providing they get a “men’s” style. When I told the guy what I wanted, he proceeded to ask me five times if I was sure that I wanted it buzzed. He even shaved a tiny bit and said, “This is the length it’ll be.”

I told him I was sure, I’d had it shorter, I wanted it buzzed, etc. He finally did it but commented the entire time about how short it would look.

When it was done, he held up the mirror to show me the back and I nodded, smiled, and said I was happy with it. His response?

“It’s too short.”

I get that some people don’t like women with super short hair. But if I’m paying for a service and tell you I’m 100% fine with it, maybe just do your job and do it how I’m paying you to do it?

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Tapped To Get Bad Customers Today

, , , | Right | May 20, 2021

We have recently been supplied with a card reader that has tapping capability. One of our cashiers called me over.

Cashier: “I don’t know what happened. The customer tapped her card and left but the sale is still on the computer. I can’t get it off; can you do it?”

Me: “The sale hasn’t been paid for. Where did the customer go?”

Cashier: “She left.”

Me: “You run out to see if you can find her. I’ll take over here.”

I put the sale on hold and continue serving customers. A few minutes later the cashier comes back without the customer. I send her on her break and continue serving another customer.

Me: “That will be [amount], please. Are you paying cash or card?”

Customer: “Card.”

I choose the card option and slide the card reader toward the customer, who has already grabbed the bag I have put the stock into. She taps the card and, without waiting to check if the sale has finalised, starts moving away from the counter.

Me: “Excuse me, the payment hasn’t been accepted. Please come back.”

Customer: “But I tapped my card.”

Me: “I know you tapped but it hasn’t registered.”

Customer: “I’d better not get charged twice for this.”

Me: “You won’t be charged twice. Please just tap your card.”

The customer taps quickly and goes to move off.

Me: “Sorry, you are doing it too quickly. You need to wait for the machine to beep.”

Customer: “It’s a tap and go card; I just have to tap and go.”

Me: “No, it’s more like a tap and wait card; you still need to wait to make sure the sale has gone through and get your receipt. Please tap slower.”

She finally does so and snatches the receipt out of my hand.

Customer: “I’d better not get charged twice for this. I’ll be checking my account and will be back if you did.”

Me: “I can assure you that you won’t be charged twice. The receipt only prints out when the sale is finalised.”

Customer: “I’m still going to check.”

I never saw her again. I had to write off the stock from the previous sale as “known shrinkage,” a code we mainly use for stolen stock.

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His Excuse Is Golden

, , , , , | Right | May 14, 2021

I am rearranging stock when a man approaches me. I am a visiting merchandiser so do not know the exact locations of stock nor am I supposed to leave my work to find what the customers are after; usually, I direct them to a staff member.  

Customer: “Where is the maple syrup?”

Me: “That’s not in this aisle; it’s in the aisle with the dessert toppings. Sorry, but I can’t show you; I don’t actually work here. A staff member could help you better.”

Customer: *Getting crankier each time he talks* “Hmph! I was told it was in this aisle. I need it for tomorrow.”

It’s the day before ANZAC Day when we honour our armed forces and their sacrifices; there’s a traditional biscuit that is often baked for that day.

Me: “Are you making ANZAC Biscuits?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “Oh, then you are after golden syrup. The shelves for golden syrup are just down from where we are, but unfortunately, it’s completely sold out.”

Customer: “How do you know that?”

Me: *Pointing to the empty shelves* “This is where it should be.”

Customer: “Why didn’t you tell me that in the first place?”

Me: “I thought you asked for maple syrup?”

Customer: *Raising his voice* “I DID!”

Me: *Stunned* “Well, I suggest you find a staff member, then. I can’t help you.”

He stared at me before stomping off, grumbling to himself.

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An Often-Told Pony Tale

, , , , | Right | May 11, 2021

I’m standing in an aisle in a supermarket trying to find a particular cleaning product. I’m wearing my work uniform — a blue paint-splattered workman’s shirt with a hot pink logo and paint-splattered blue jeans. Staff wears red polo shirts, black pants, and yellow hi-vis vests.

Elderly Man: “Excuse me, do you know where I can find magazines?”

Me: “I’m sorry, I don’t work here. There’s a lady behind you who does; she might be able to help.”

Elderly Man: “Oh, thank you! Ma’am, can you tell me where the magazines are?”

To my horror, I realise the tall person with the long ponytail standing behind the elderly man is actually a young man.

Young Man: “Aisle six, at the end.”

Me: “I am so, so sorry. I just saw your ponytail and assumed!”

Young Man: “That’s fine; it happens.”

Elderly Man: “I found my magazines!”

He walked away holding a can of beans and a birthday card.

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