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We Hope This Doesn’t Ring A Bell For You

, , , , , | Working | February 24, 2022

When I was twenty, I was working in a restaurant as a waitress. The chef was a strange guy with many really disturbing stories to tell. I did my best to keep things civil despite him creeping me out and him having a very short fuse.

One particular night, we were short of staff so I was the only waitress. We were under the pump and I was running to and from the kitchen to get food out and dirty dishes cleared away. He was well aware that I was doing everything I could but chose that moment to go on a power trip.

The chef had a bell that he rang every time an order was up. I, like many in the service industry, was Pavlovian trained to get my a**e to the kitchen quick smart when I heard the bell. This particular night, he was giving it a pounding, which was starting to get on my nerves because I was only humanly capable of so much. I hit my limit when, at some point, I was stuck dealing with a customer for a minute and he just went to town on that bell, dinging it repeatedly every few seconds until I could make it back to the kitchen.

It was a rowdy restaurant and the kitchen was a bit separated from the tables, so the customers probably didn’t register the bell but I was acutely tuned to it.

I was absolutely fuming but knew no good would come from a discussion as I’d already told him that I was doing everything as fast as possible, not that he couldn’t have noticed that himself. So, in the red haze of fury, I somehow managed to finish up with the customer and very calmly walk into the kitchen, pick up the bell, and walk out with it. I walked over and placed it behind the bar. Then, I attempted to head back to the kitchen to get the food out.

The chef stormed after me, demanding the bell back from the confused barmaid, and came barreling toward me like he was going to punch me. I calmly told him again that I was doing my job as fast as humanly possible and that overuse of the bell could not make things move along faster. I truly thought he was going to hit me that night, but having the barmaid and drinks staff nearby made him think twice.

I returned to the kitchen and served the food that was waiting to go out. We didn’t speak for the rest of the evening, but he took it easy with the bell after that. And I spoke to one of my bosses later who, luckily, took my word for things, and I never saw that chef again.

You Can Only Push People So Far

, , , , , | Working | February 22, 2022

I worked in an extremely busy restaurant in a very popular tourist town. We were so busy that we would often have people start, not be able to handle the workload, and quit before finishing their first shift.

I was the sous chef and hadn’t had a day off since I started, over eighteen months before this point. My head chef had worked for over three years without a day off. I loved my job and my head chef, and the money was really good, so I stuck it out.

This was the final straw.

My head chef and I would work from 6:00 am until around 2:30 pm and then from 5:00 pm until whenever we closed. The owners — a husband and wife, both qualified chefs — would cover our break but refused to work any more hours.

Three months previous, I had requested (and been approved) to take time off from the break on Friday until Monday morning to attend my best friend’s wedding four hours away. 

Me: “Great, see you Monday.”

Owner #1: “Haha, very funny. See you tonight.”

Me: “I’m off for the weekend. I’ll be back Monday morning.”

Owner #1: “No, we need you here. We don’t have anyone to cover you.”

Me: “That’s your problem, not mine. I asked for this months ago.”

Owner #1: “It’s not like you’re the one getting married. You need to be here, working, not partying and being a slut. Be back here at five or kiss your job goodbye.”

Me: “Are you serious? I’ve worked every single day for over eighteen months, and now you’re telling me I can’t take a weekend off to be the maid of honor at my best friend’s wedding?”

Owner #1: *Smugly* “Yep. See you tonight.”

Without another word, I turned around, went out the back, and got my personal belongings from the back. As I was walking through the kitchen, my head chef was finishing up before his break and could see I was pissed off.

Head Chef: “[My Name], you okay?”

Me: “Sorry, but I quit. I’ve had enough.”

I walked up to [Owner #2].

Me: “I’ve worked my a*** off for you and this restaurant, but I’ve finally had enough. I quit.”

I started walking out and [Owner #2] ran after me.

Owner #2: “What’s wrong? You can’t quit. We need you.”

Me: “I’ve worked every single day since I started, sometimes up to eighteen hours a day, without complaint. I want two and a half days off for my best friend’s wedding, and your wife tells me I have to work and not party and be a slut. So I quit. Good luck finding someone that’s willing to work as hard as I have. Tell your wife she can go f*** herself.”

I walked out, still shaking I was so angry. I had just made it home when my head chef, who’s also my neighbour, came by.

Head Chef: “You’ve got to be kidding me. I knew [Owner #1] was a b****, but f****** h***. After you left, she had the hide to say that you didn’t deserve the time off and she’d make sure you didn’t get another job in town, so I told her to shove it where the sun doesn’t shine and quit, too. I think most of the crew are doing the same thing.”

I went to my friend’s wedding and ended up extending my holiday. When I returned, I found out that my quitting had caused a chain reaction; not only had the head chef quit, but 90% of all the staff quit over the rest of the day. The restaurant had to shut for over a week as there wasn’t enough staff, and it permanently closed within six months.

Just Give Him Spaghetti And Call It Noodles

, , | Right | February 16, 2022

I work in an Italian restaurant. There used to be an Asian restaurant next door to us, but they closed several months ago. A customer walks in.

Me: “Good evening, sir. What can I get for you tonight?”

Customer: “Fried rice?”

Me: “Sorry, sir, we don’t sell fried rice. We have pasta and pizza.”

I indicate the takeaway menus on the table next to him.

Customer: “But I used to get fried rice from [Asian Restaurant]. Why can’t you make me some fried rice?”

Me: “Because we are an Italian restaurant and don’t make or sell fried rice. I can get you some pasta or pizza?”

Customer: *Starting to walk out* “I really wanted some fried rice, though.”

The Fluffiest Fraud

, , , , , | Healthy | February 16, 2022

I work as a vet. Our computer system is set up so that we can submit our clients’ insurance claims for their visits directly to their insurer — just a few clicks to submit the notes and the invoice, minimal hassle for everyone. We don’t have any way of knowing whether or not the claim gets accepted or rejected unless the client lets us know.

Client: “The claim for Fluffy’s [condition] got rejected.”

Me: “Ah, that’s a bugger. We had discussed that it might not get through because it would probably be considered pre-existing, but at least we gave it a go and know for the future.”

Client: “Yeah, sure, but what did you write in the submission claim? Like, the wording?”

Me: “I just submitted my clinical record. There aren’t any notes we write in addition to that.”

Client: “But what did you say Fluffy had?”

Me: “[Condition]. Which is what he has.”

Client: “Do you think you could resubmit it but write that he has [similar condition, which has similar symptoms but is treated differently]?”

Me: “Uh, no.”

Client: “Why not? It’s easy; just change a couple of words and it’s all good. Then it might get approved.

Me: “[Client], I will explain this very clearly to you. The clinic system locks the records after a certain time frame because they are classed as legal documents. Any changes to said documents after the fact would be grounds for me to face disciplinary action from my professional regulator. And very simply, what you are asking me to do is commit insurance fraud.”

Client: “Are you sure about that?”

Me: “Uh, yes, definitely fraud.”

Client: “So, you can’t do anything to get around it?”

Me: “No. I like my job. I’m not risking my licence.”

Client: “So, there’s really nothing you can do about this, then.”

Me: “[Client], stop asking. The answer is no. If you still don’t like it, you’re welcome to see one of my colleagues, but they will tell you the same thing, and your insurer already has the info anyway.”

Client: “…”

He wasn’t a client of ours for much longer. I can’t say he’ll be missed. Good luck and apologies to the next clinic who ended up with him.

“The Lion Fell In Love With The Lamb” Does Sound Better

, , , , , , | Related | February 15, 2022

When I was fifteen, I (very regrettably) fell on the “Twilight” bandwagon when it was first released. My parents were asking about this book I was suddenly obsessed with.

Dad: “So, [My Name], tell me about this new book.”

Me: “It’s about a vampire that falls in love with a human.”

Dad: “Doesn’t he want to eat her?”

Me: “Yes, that’s what it’s about. He loves her so much that he doesn’t eat her even though he really wants to.”

Dad: “So, it’s like me falling in love with a roast dinner.”