I’ve been working reception at this auction house for about three weeks, and today I had a truck driver come in to collect a client’s purchase. As I’m getting the paperwork ready, we’re having a casual chat about the weather.

Truck Driver: “It’s hot in this office!”

Me: “Is it still chilly outside?”

Truck Driver: “Not too chilly, but windy.”

Me: “Yeah, it always seems to be windy in this area.”

Truck Driver: “You know why, right?”

Me: *Not sure where this is going.* “I’m really not sure.”

Truck Driver: “Well, you’re right near the airport here, you’ve got all those planes around!”

Me: *Confused.* “I don’t think the planes cause wind.”

Truck Driver: “Haven’t you heard about chemtrails?

At this point, I see where he’s going. I try hard not to roll my eyes, but there is definitely an eye-roll in my voice when I say:

Me: “Yeah, I’ve heard about chemtrails.”

I’ve finished up his paperwork, and I hand it to him and send him on his way, then the other receptionist says to me:

Receptionist: “He’s in here all the time, he’s always full of crap like that. I was looking anywhere but at him, so he couldn’t draw me in!”

…Well, thanks for leaving the nutcase for me to deal with!

Several years ago, I attended an auction of equipment related to my place of employment. We used quite a varied lot of hand and mechanized tools to repair and modify equipment used in producing feed for livestock.

I had bid on and won a few items for our department and had written down my winning bids in my own notebook so that I could be sure everything was in agreement with the record that the auction clerk kept. 

I gave the clerk my bidder’s number, and she pulled and added up all the tickets from my purchases. When she gave me the total, along with the adding machine tape of the calculation, it didn’t agree with my notes.

Me: “I think there’s been a mistake.”

The clerk instantly became angry and condescending.

Clerk: “There’s been no mistake! This is your total. You will be paying exactly what I’ve laid out.”

All righty, then. Yes, I’ll pay exactly what you say. So, when you balance your books later, enjoy explaining why you charged someone $180.00 for an item that had actually auctioned for $1,800.00