In Receipt Of A Pair Of Ears

, , , , , | Right | August 10, 2018

(The customer in front of me at the grocery store has just finished getting his items scanned. This store offers the option of receipts in the usual paper format or by email to save waste.)

Cashier: “Would you like your receipt emailed, on paper, or neither?”

Customer: “No.”

Cashier: “Okay, then, no receipt it is. Please insert your card.”

Customer: *after paying* “Where’s my receipt?”

Cashier: “You said you didn’t want your receipt.”

Customer: “No, I didn’t want it emailed.”

Me: “No, she asked if you wanted the receipt emailed or on paper. You said, ‘No,’ so she said, ‘Okay, no receipt, then,’ and you paid. If you wanted a receipt, you should have said so.”

Customer: “I wanted it on paper, not email!”

Me: “Too bad you didn’t listen, then, huh?”

(The cashier had to call for a manager to get the receipt pulled up and printed — because if anyone could do it, theft would be really easy. There was a ten-minute wait and a long line built up because this guy desperately needed a receipt for his milk.)

You’re Going To Pay A Price For This

, , , , , | Right | August 8, 2018

(I am ringing up other customers, while also helping my assistant manager count cigarettes for inventory. A customer walks up with some of our air freshener products that have been marked down due to the department shrinking in size. We’ve had some trouble in the past few weeks with other customers putting items in the wrong place or new employees not knowing where to put them.)

Customer: “Hi! How are you?”

Me: “Doing fine. And you?”

Customer: “I’m doing great; thanks for asking. I wanted to make sure that these all rang up at the right price. Could you check them for me?”

Me: “I certainly can!”

(I start ringing up the items, watching each one and telling her the price of each. Three of the air freshener products come out on sale, but not at the price SHE wanted.)

Customer: “Why aren’t those on sale?”

Me: “These are on sale already at $6.99, which is better than the $8.19 price they originally were. Was there another price there? Maybe a clearance tag?”

Customer: “I understand they are on sale!” *at this point she’s yelling* “But they aren’t at the price I wanted them at!”

Me: “Let me get someone to go and check the price, then.”

(I call one of my associates over and ask for her to go check the three products. She goes and checks, but not any of the three are on sale.)

Me: “None of the three are on sale; did you still want to get them?”

Customer: *sigh* “No.”

(I continue ringing her up, and at the end of the transaction, my associate apologizes for the inconvenience.)

Coworker: “I’m sorry for the inconvenience, miss.”

Me: “We are trying to make sure that all clearance items are in the right place. I thank you for your patience.”


(Both of us looked at each other as she walked out the door, shaking our heads in disbelief.)

A Monster Mash Potato

, , , , | Right | August 7, 2018

(I am working in an express lane. I am still finishing up with the first customer when the second customer sets down a small tub of plain yogurt on the belt.)

Customer #1: “Hey, did you know that if you put regular yogurt in your mashed potatoes, it makes ’em creamier?”

Customer #2: “Really? I didn’t know that! I might have to try that.”

Customer #1: “You learn something new everyday!” *walks away*

(As soon as [Customer #1] is out of earshot…)

Customer #2: *to me* “Yeah… I am definitely not trying that.”

A Surcharge Barrage

, , , | Right | August 3, 2018

(In my country, not all stores accept Amex — American Express. One evening a middle-aged woman and her daughter are shopping, and at the counter she takes out her card.)

Customer: “Can I use Amex?”

Me: “Sure, but there’s a 2% surcharge.”

Customer: “That’s fine.”

(Most customers flinch a bit, or outright say they’ll use another card, but some do still use Amex despite the surcharge. Because of her words and tone, I assume that she means what she said, so I don’t notice her switching her cards as I bag up her items and wish her a good night. Ten minutes later, I find her hovering at the front, face like thunder, holding her receipt. I approach her and ask her if everything’s all right.)

Customer: *coldly shoving her receipt in my face* “Care to tell me why you processed that sale as an Amex when I explicitly told you I was using Visa? I want the surcharge refunded!”

(It’s less than a dollar. I’ve only got about a year’s retail experience under my belt, so I take one look at her expression and decide I am not nearly battle-hardened enough to deal with the fury she clearly wants to unleash upon me.)

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, I made a mistake. I don’t even know if it’s possible for me to refund that to you with our system, but I’ll ask my manager and find out for you.”

(I find my manager. When I explain the situation, and the surcharge amount, the customer starts acting very sheepish.)

Customer: “It’s just the principle of the thing…”

(For the next ten minutes, as my wonderful manager attempts to find a way to refund the surcharge, the customer mutters that line over and over. Eventually my manager finds a way to refund the surcharge, and the customer leaves, still sheepishly muttering her line.)

Manager: “Wow.”

That Was Close… Too Close…

, , , , | Right | August 2, 2018

(In the mornings I go to a grocery store to get lunch for work. Sometimes people queuing have no idea how to queue, coming way closer than it is comfortable for the person using the pin machine at the register. This shop has enough space along the conveyor belt, but the actual register area is small. When people don’t wait at the conveyor belt, they are standing right next to the pin machine. This morning I have had enough. I am packing my stuff as quickly as possible, as there is very little space.)

Cashier: “It’ll be [amount].”

Me: “I’ll pay with a card, please.”

(Lifting my head I notice the next customer standing right in front of the card machine.)

Me: “…”

Guy: *looks at me, doesn’t move*

Me: “Sorry, did you want to pay for this?”

Guy: “Oh, no.” *still doesn’t move*

Me: *making shooing motion with hands* “Then give me some space, please.”

Guy: *takes one tiny step back, basically still looming over the pin machine*

Me: “Keep going…”

Guy: *reluctantly takes one more step back*

(After that I could pay. The register lady had an interesting smile on her face and gave me a look that said she’s seen people like the other customer a few times too many.)

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