She Was Framed

, , , , | Legal Right | September 3, 2018

(I work for the county as a correctional officer, and as such wear a uniform similar to that of the county sheriff deputies. Due to this, I usually go home to change before doing my shopping, unless it’s quick and on my way home. This happens today, where I am one of two customers in the store. I overhear this conversation as I come to the checkout. I’m behind the customer, who does not know that I am there.)

Customer: “I want to get this frame, but I think that I should get it for free.”

Employee: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Well, the last time I was in here I was helped by an employee that was very rude to me and I think I should be compensated. So, I want this frame for free.”

Employee: “Well, I’m sorry that your last visit here was unpleasant, but I can’t just give you this for free. I would lose my job.”


Employee: “I am not going to give you this for free and if you do leave here without paying that would be stealing and I will call the police to report it.”

Customer: “Well, I’ll just tell them that you said I could have it for free and who do you think they will believe: a little old lady or the little teenage brat of an employee that is just trying to save herself from getting fired from the only job she could ever get, hmm?”

Employee: “Actually I think they are going to believe the gentlemen in line behind you more than they will believe either of us.”

Customer: *turns around to see me and goes completely white* “Umm… I was… I was… just talking to…”

(I say nothing and simply pull out my handcuffs. The customer sets the frame down and quickly leaves, slamming into a locked door before pushing on the open door.)

Employee: “She tries that at least once every other week and we usually just give in just to get her out of the store. The look on her face when she saw you was priceless.”

Me: “Glad I could help. Funny thing, though, I’m just a corrections officer. I couldn’t have arrested her if she stole it and hit you on her way out the door.”

(I have been back to that store a couple of times both in and out of uniform and have been told that the lady has yet to come back.)

Give Me Five!

, , , | Right | September 3, 2018

(Every once in a while, we will have a clearance sale on our tees. The prices will start at $5.00 and go up, and we have signs that are super specific that say that as well. Well, we know how much people read signs, right?)

Lady: “Okay, I think I’m ready to check out.”

(She puts down an armful of clearance shirts and waits for me to scan them. The items all ranged in prices five and up.)

Me: “Perfect, your total will be [price].”

Lady: “Excuse me? No, that’s wrong. The bin said that they are all five dollars.”

Me: “I’m sorry. That is incorrect. If you look at the sign, it says that the items in the bin are priced as marked and it starts at $5.00 and will go up depending on the date we got the item.”

Lady: “This is absolutely inappropriate. Your advertisement is a disappointment and you are deceiving me. I want to speak to your manager.”

Me: “I am the manager. And I can assure you that the items are $5.00 and up. I can show you the items that are five dollars. They will be marked as is.”

(I show her the items that are five dollars and she huffs and puffs and complains the whole way. Meanwhile there are people in line and I am the only one in the store at the time. I show her the items, she brings them up to the counter, and I ring them in for her, giving her the new total.)

Me: “Your total is [price].”

(The lady started screaming. I showed her the prices on the computer and how they matched in my computer. She stopped whining, looked at me, and huffed out of the store. She didn’t come back until five minutes to close and she ended up buying all the items that she had the first time around, the whole time muttering to herself.)

Waiting In Line And Starting To Whine

, , , | Right | September 3, 2018

(I’m a customer. I’m at the grocery store shortly after noon. The queues are long, and the cashier has just announced that she regretfully can’t open another line because there aren’t enough employees. One middle-aged customer a bit behind me has been muttering loudly for a while now.)

Customer: “You have to open another register! I’m on my lunch break; I still want to eat something today!”

Cashier: “I’m sorry, sir, that’s not possible right now.”

Customer: *keeps muttering and complaining*

(Finally a second register is opened and he rushes to be the first and relates his tragic story to the new cashier again… He’s on lunch break; this is an outrage, etc. It’s my turn on the first register and I am fed up.)

Me: “You can stop complaining now. It’s your turn. They said it’s not easily possible to open another register, but they’re obviously working as fast as they can. Please stop harassing them!”

Customer: “I’m not talking to YOU!”

Me: “And thank goodness for that.”

My Cashier: “Thank you. Some people really think we’re robots, apparently.”

(I bid them a good day and walked to my car — and the guy had the gall to follow me and start harassing me about not knowing what it’s like to work. I’m obviously dressed for an office job and clearly old enough to be working. He said that I’m a lazy b**** and need to keep my mouth shut. I told him to leave me alone but he followed me to my car, where I got in quickly and locked it from the inside. Eventually he wandered away, again muttering, and got into a car with a business logo and name printed on the side. Guess who received a rather colorful email the moment I came home?)

Trying That Russian Medicine

, , , , | Right | September 3, 2018

(I am picking up groceries with my family. While we are checking out, I notice an old man behind us in line with both hands bandaged.)

Me: “Excuse me; can I help you check out?”

Old Man: “Why? Is it because I’m OLD?!”

Me: “Um…”

Old Man: “You young people assume I can’t do anything just because I’m old! I’m still perfectly capable of unloading my own— Oh. You were talking about my hands, weren’t you?”

Me: “…yes.”

Old Man: “That’s okay, then, young lady. I’m fine as long as I can hold my vodka in one hand and the TV remote in the other.”

(He proceeded to make conversation with me while I hid behind my uncle, mortified.)

Cash Back Attack, Part 6

, , , | Right | September 1, 2018

(I do conventions, selling my arts and crafts. I am taking a girl’s credit card via my PayPal swiper on my phone.)

Customer: “Can I get cash back for this?”

Me: “Uh… Madam… It doesn’t work that way… I don’t have a register.”

Customer: “Oh, right, sorry.”

Cash Back Attack, Part 5
Cash Back Attack, Part 4
Cash Back Attack, Part 3

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