The Recouponator

, , , , , | Right | March 2, 2018

(I am working my first job as a cashier in a large and popular retail store. I have only been there a couple of weeks. Note that while we may have coupons out on the registers, we are not allowed to offer them up. If a customer sees it in time, they may use it. If not, they can take one for another time, or just move on.)

Me: *completing the transaction* “And if you could just sign this for me?”

(Once we reach the point of a signature, there’s no going back. If something is wrong by then, a manager must do a post-sale void or adjustment.)

Customer: *sees a coupon specifically for the only thing she’s buying* “Wait. Can I use this?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t apply anything else at this point. I can’t go back from here.”

Customer: “Well, can’t you just put it in?”

Me: “I don’t even have the option to go back at this point. We can only complete the transaction; maybe customer service can help you.”

(This goes on for a moment, before she finally completes it, takes her receipt, and goes to customer service. A little while later, a coworker of mine from customer service comes up to me at my register.)

Coworker: “Did you have a lady over here, complaining about—” *picks up coupon* “—one of these?”

Me: *laughing* “Yes.”

Coworker: “I just wanted to apologize for her. She was rude to me, too.”

(I told him not to worry about apologizing for her, because some people are just like that. According to him, she complained about our training. Sorry we can’t apply coupons AFTER a transaction!)

Surely They’re Toying With You?

, , , , , | Right | March 2, 2018

(This has happened multiple times as I finish ringing up a customer.)

Me: “Is there anything else I can help you with today?”

Customer: “No, that’s it.”

Me: “Okay, your total is [total].”

(The customer then points at a child holding a toy, on the other side of the store, who in no way has displayed any connection to the customer until just this moment.)

Customer: “Did you get his toy?”

Me: “No. Please bring it up here and I’ll ring it up.”

You’re Under Attax

, , , , | Right | March 1, 2018

(It’s not uncommon around where I live for people or businesses to leave off sales tax when customers pay in cash. Because this is illegal, my business does not leave tax off, but many customers are still used to this practice. I’ve had many variations of this conversation:)

Me: “Hello! Your total today will be $425.”

Customer: “Okay, but I have cash so there’s no tax.”

Me: “Sorry, sir. Your material is taxable, so I’ll have to charge sales tax.”

Customer: “What?! What are you talking about? I’m. Paying. In. CASH. NO TAX!”

Me: “Sir, it is against the law to not charge tax on taxable items.”

Customer: “Well, I don’t see how that’s my problem!”

Me: “Sir, I am not willing to get in trouble with the government over your $25 in tax money. If you do not intend to pay the full amount, I’m afraid you will not be leaving here with your material.”

Customer: *pays, but leaves muttering about us and the government*

Paying It Forward To Make The Line Go Forward

, , , , , | Right | February 28, 2018

(I am working the customer service desk. My manager has just arrived and is standing near me. I am currently helping a customer when another customer lines up behind and this happens.)

Customer #1: *in line, pointing to a small container of hummus* “Could you help me unwrap this?”

Manager: *opens package slightly for him* “[My Name] will help you check out.”

Me: *finishing with first customer* “Hello, sir. How are you today?”

Customer #1: “Fine.” *rips rest of package off before paying*

(Upon scanning the barcode of the package, I notice he has put some change beside it, but the item is slightly more expensive.)

Me: “Your total today is [price].”

(The customer throws down his unwrapped hummus container angrily.)


Me: “Unfortunately, you have to buy two items to get that price.”

Customer #1: “NO! IT’S BUY ONE FOR [SLIGHTLY CHEAPER PRICE] AND THAT’S ALWAYS HOW IT’S BEEN AT [THIS STORE] AND [COMPETITOR]!” *throws some random coins down, but it’s still not enough* “THERE! THAT’S ALL THE MONEY I HAVE!”

Me: *not sure what to do* “Uh, I… I’m sorry, sir.”

Manager: “I will go check the sign.”

(Another customer has just lined up behind the irate customer and has obviously heard him yelling.)

Customer #2: “Here.” *holding out enough money to pay for [Customer #1]*

Me: “Oh, are you sure? Thank you so much!”

Customer #1: *still yelling and flailing about*

Customer #2: “Hey, bud, it’s all right. I paid for it.” *hands him hummus*

Customer #1: “You’re a real gentleman, sir!” *gives me a dirty look and leaves*

(In [Customer #1]’s haste, he does not pick up his change, since [Customer #2] has more than paid his hummus. I deduct that from [Customer #2]’s order and thank him profusely. [Customer #2] is also buying a lottery ticket.)

Me: “Hopefully good karma is on your side and you’ll win big!”

(My manager came back and confirmed that not only was there not a current deal for buying two items, but the correct price was also clearly advertised.)

Soda, So Dumb

, , , , , , | Working | February 28, 2018

(I’m at a grocery store. It’s shortly before the store closes and their sale prices end. It’s a location I’ve never shopped in before, but I have been visiting a friend nearby, so I stop in. There are very few customers in the store, which is a bit surprising. I’ve been charged with purchasing the soft drinks for a large party and am buying 12-packs in a variety of flavors. Most of my shopping has been done on previous days and I’ve limited the purchases to 12 twelve-packs during each stop to avoid depleting the shelves. This store has stacks and stacks of the product, which surprises me, as the price is quite low and the other locations I’ve shopped at have limited quantities due to the large volume of sales.)

Cashier: “I’m sorry. I can only sell four 12-packs to you; we have to limit the sales so we don’t run out of product. Which would you like to buy?”

Me: “Really? The store is nearly overrun with the soda and the sale ends in an hour. Do you think you’re going to run out before then?”

Cashier: “That’s our policy and I can’t make any exceptions.”

Me: “May I speak with the manager, please?”

(The manager confirmed that this was the case and I would be only allowed to buy four, also that I wouldn’t be allowed to purchase more if I left the store and re-entered. I left, not purchasing anything, and made a hasty drive to the location near my home where I usually shop to get the rest of the soda. As expected, the supply was depleted, but I managed to find what I needed and check out with no issues. I mentioned my experience to the cashier, and she knew exactly to which store I’d been and related that the particular store has very low sales numbers and always has loads of unsold product at the end of special promotions, and the management there can’t figure out why.)

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