Their Receipt Has An Attention Deficit

, , , , | Right | June 19, 2017

(Working at a chain convenience store, we accept bottle returns, recently raised to 10 cents each, on any product we sell in the store. A man has come in with two empty cans, which we accept, and his two children. He purchases four beverages with bottle deposits on them, and rather than giving him the 20 cents for his bottles, I just added that amount to his charge as a payment. This shows up on our receipts as a separate payment, very clearly. With four people still in line, he comes back into the store.)

Customer #1: “I brought in two cans.”

Me: “Yes, sir. I added the deposit amount as a payment on your charge.”

Customer #1: “But you charged me for four bottle deposits. You overcharged me.”

Me: “No, sir, you bought four drinks with bottle deposit on them. ”

Customer #1: “Right, but I brought to empties back.”

Me: “Yes, sir. Right here it shows where I credited you those two cans.”

Customer #1: “But you charged me for FOUR deposits!”

(As this conversation is going, two more people have joined the line, and since I’m the only one working, I rush through an explanation of how we handle bottle returns, and how being owed 20 cents doesn’t make the till take off 20 cents. He leaves shortly, but obviously still isn’t quite satisfied with the answer.)

Customer #2: “Wow.”

Me: “Sometimes people pay exactly the wrong amount of attention.”

Taxed Ten Cents Too Much

, , , , | Right | June 19, 2017

Me: “Okay, your total is [total].”

Customer: “I have this five dollar off coupon.”

Me: “Oh, sorry, as it says on the coupon, the five dollars off are only for purchases of $25.00 or above, excluding tax.”

Customer: “But I have $25.00.”

Me: “Yes, but that’s including the tax. Your total before tax is $24.90 which is what the coupon counts. You can grab a candy or something to make it enough.”

(The lady stands there for ages angrily reading all the exclusions on the coupon.)

Me: “Uh… so did you want to grab a candy or…?”

Customer: “IT DOESN’T SAY THAT ABOUT THE TAX ON THIS COUPON!”

Me: “It’s a law that coupons can’t be used on tax, not store policy, so they wouldn’t write it on the coupon—”

Customer: “IT DOESN’T SAY THAT ABOUT THE TAX ON THIS COUPON. I’M CALLING THE BETTER BUSINESS BUREAU.”

(She then throws the coupon and storms out, leaving her purchases. All right, lady. If they printed every single consumer and business law on a coupon, it would go out the door!)

Burn Your Return

, , , , , | Right | June 18, 2017

Customer: “I would like to return these pants.”

Me: “Okay, do you have your receipt?”

Customer: “Yes, I do.” *hands the receipt to me* “I’m returning them because the girl blew her nose and picked up a receipt off the floor and didn’t wash her hands. I think they are contaminated.  They are dirty now. You need to train your employees to be sanitary.”

Me: “Aren’t you the woman who used to come in the dry cleaners I used to work at and always complain and try to get a free order? Then I went to working at [Local Drug Store] and you had issues there, too. Let me tell you something. We are sales associates who try to do our jobs and make other people happy. But you are one customer who I know well, and nothing satisfies you.”

Customer: “I want to see a manager.”

(Manager comes up to the register.)

Manager: “How may I help you?”

Customer: “This employee is back-talking me.”

Manager: *holding up the pants* “What is your reason for returning this now? Let me tell you something, miss. Every week, you are in here returning something, sometimes more than once a week.”

Customer: “Well, your sales associates are disrespectful and this item was touched by someone who didn’t wash their hands after they rang me up and they blew their nose. They also picked up a slip off the floor. I can’t shop in a store so dirty.”

Manager: “I can return the pants, but honestly, I don’t like to lose customers. In your case, however, your returns are far outweighing your purchases and we feel you are abusing our return policy. This is the last return we are processing for you. I am asking you to not come back in this store, as you’ve had a history of harassing associates.”

(The customer took the completed return and left, clearly in shock. That’s the last time I saw the Watertown Retail Bully ever around my area.)

If I Had A Dollar For Every Lie

, , , , | Right | June 16, 2017

(I work as a cashier at a non-profit thrift store. A customer comes up to my till full of what appears to be yarn and a few other crafting items.)

Customer: “This is all 50 and 25 cent stuff. Can I just tell you how many are 50 and how many are 25 so you don’t have to go through everything?”

Me: *a bit suspicious* “No, ma’am, I’ll need to go through it all. Just to be sure.

Customer: “But it’ll be so much faster this way.”

Me: “I insist, ma’am.”

(She argues for a little bit more but relents. Sure enough, the first layer of items are just balls of yarn priced 25 and 50 cents. But after that, there are a whole bunch of fabric bolts ranging from $1 to $2. As I’m going through her purchase, I’m politely mentioning the price of each item, as she just stares at me being completely silent. After she pays…)

Customer: “You should learn to be more trusting of others.”

Me: *stunned* “Umm… Thank you, ma’am. Have a wonderful day!”

Make That Your Uniform Response

, , , , | Right | June 16, 2017

(I’m working as a bagger today and am standing at the end of a belt when a customer walks up behind me and starts asking a question.)

Customer: “Excuse me, sir, could you hand me some extra bags?” *I turn to look at him as he steps in front of me* “Oh! I’m so sorry, ma’am!”

Me: *I smile and hand him a couple bags* “It’s all right.”

Customer: *very embarrassed and seeming unsure what to do with himself* “It’s just from the back… I like your hair.”

(I had a very unfortunate hair cut a couple months back and drastic measures had to be taken.)

Me: “It’s fine; don’t worry about.” *as he turns and walks away, inspiration hits me* “It’s called a uniform for a reason!”

Customer: “Yeah, it is!”

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