Their Ability To Read Has Signed Out

, , , , | Right | June 18, 2020

I work in an assisted-living facility. Two older women, probably in their sixties or seventies, come up to the front desk. They are well-dressed and both have their phones out, just putting them away, so I’m thinking they’re cool with technology, and they’re both speaking perfectly clear English to each other with no hint of an accent, so I’m not sensing a language barrier.

I greet them and they ask if they can visit a resident.

Me: ”Of course! I’ll just need both of you to sign in here.”

I indicate a large tablet computer.

Visitor #1: “Okay.”

She stares at the computer, which has two buttons on it that take up almost the entire screen, one saying “sign in,” the other “sign out,” and the top says, “Please choose one.”

Me: “You can start by tapping ‘sign in.’”

Visitor #1: “Oh… okay.”

She taps “sign in” and continues staring at the next screen which has three buttons, each a different category of visitor.

Visitor #1: “What do I do now?”

Me: “It depends! Are you a healthcare provider? A family member or friend?”

Visitor #1: “I’m a friend.”

She just looks at me expectantly.

Me: “Okay, then you’ll tap the middle button which says. ‘Family, Friend, or Volunteer.’”

She taps the correct button.

Visitor #1: “It says I need to enter my name. Should I do that?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

She spends a good three minutes inputting her name.

Me: “Good, and now you’ll need to put in the last name of the person you’re visiting.”

She begins typing in the person’s full name.

Me: “No, I’m sorry, just the last name.”

I stare forlornly at the huge font that says, “Please type in resident’s LAST name.”

Visitor #1: “Oh… Okay… What now?”

Me: “Oh, it looks like there’s a C missing there; let me just fix that for you.”

I fix the spelling error.

Visitor #1: “Can I go now?”

She looks expectantly at me again.

Me: “Not yet. You just need to tap the name here—”

Visitor #1: “And now I’m done?”

Me: “One more step. Are you visiting anyone else?”

Visitor #1: “No, just my friend.”

Me: “Then tap ‘no’ where it says there…”

The name tag prints out and I hand it to her.

Visitor #1: “What is this?”

Me: “That’s a name tag that you’ll stick to your shirt there so we know that you’re a visitor when we see you.”

She sticks it to herself after a good minute of trying to peel the backing off.

Visitor #1: “Does she need to sign in, too?” *Indicates her friend*

Me: “Yes, ma’am, everyone who comes in needs a name tag.”

Visitor #1: “Oh, she can just wear mine.”

Me: “That’s… Then you wouldn’t have one.”

[Visitor #2], who has watched me walk her friend through the whole process step-by-step and is still staring at me expectantly now, steps forward.

Visitor #2: “What do I do?”

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Weird Place To Keep A Copi— Uh… Printer

, , , , | Working | June 5, 2020

I work at the front desk of an assisted living facility. Among my equipment is a printer. It’s not a fancy three-in-one. It does not do copies or faxes, just printing. A printer is not a copier. I’m sure 99% of you understand that, but not my coworker here.

Coworker: “[Other Coworker] said to come up here and get a copy. Can I get a copy of this?”

The coworker holds up paper.

Me: “I don’t have a copy machine, just a printer.”

Coworker: *Looks at my printer* “What’s that, then?”

Me: “It’s a printer. It just does printing.”

Coworker: “Well, that’s what I need — a printout.”

Me: “But… it’s just a printer. It literally can’t see anything to copy it.”

Coworker: *Blank look* “What?”

Me: “It doesn’t make copies. It… prints from this computer only.”

Coworker: “Ugh, I just need a copy of it. Can’t you do that?”

Me: “I’m not allowed to leave the desk right now. The copy machine is all the way in the back of the building.”

Coworker: “Are you sure you can’t just print it out from there?”

She points to my printer.

Me: “It doesn’t have any way to see the paper and I don’t have that document on my computer. It’s… a printer, not a copier.”

Coworker: “Ugh, fine, I’ll find someone else.”

She honestly didn’t understand the difference between a printer and a copier. It’s not like she’s way older or way younger, either. She’s in her thirties, same as me. Oh, and she couldn’t have done it herself, because only those in supervisory roles have the code to get into the copy room. I think she wanted me to pull a copier out of my a** or something.

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The Biggest Work-Related Mood

, , , , , | Working | June 1, 2020

I’m sitting at the front desk of the assisted living facility where I work, going through my opening tasks, when a coworker comes around the corner to talk to my boss near my desk.

Boss: “Hey, [Coworker], you doing all right today?”

Coworker: “Not really. My stomach is upset and I feel awful, honestly. I was going to ask—”

Boss: “Oookay!” *Backs up* “Go home! Get out! UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN!”

The boss makes shooing motions and then an X with her fingers. [Coworker] puts their hands up and laughs.

Coworker: “Thank you. I’m going! I’m going!”

The boss runs and hides in her office as my coworker starts toward my desk.

Me: “NO! Unclean! Go awaaaay!”

I hide under my desk.

Coworker: “Nice to know I’m loved! Bye, [My Name]!”

Me: *From under the desk* “Bye! Feel better!”

We’ve been dealing with a norovirus here for twelve days and counting now and we’ve pretty much all had it, me included. We’re all a little punchy and sick of it.

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It’s Sad That This Is Remarkable

, , , | Working | June 1, 2020

I work in an assisted living facility. The phone starts ringing and, looking at the caller ID, I see the name of a home care agency whose worker I’ve just had to deny access to. Sighing and preparing for a fight, I pick up and answer.

Me: “[Business], this is [My Name].”

Caller: “Hello, this is [Caller] from [Home Health Agency]. We just sent over an aide and she told us she was denied access. I just want to apologize for that.”

Me: “Oh…”

Caller: “We had her marked in our system as credentialed when she isn’t yet, so that’s our fault. We’re working on sending someone else out as we speak.”

Me: “I… Wow, okay, great! Thank you for being understanding! Usually, I get yelled at when I have to deny someone.”

Caller: “Oh, it’s no problem. It was our bad.”

We went on to talk more about her new aide coming out, etc. But I’m still floored that she was actually understanding about me having to deny her worker access to the building. I just… that doesn’t happen. It was a very nice change!

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Nonagenarians Living On The Edge

, , , , , | Healthy | April 28, 2020

I am an aide for the elderly. I’ve been sick for a few days and since all of my clients are high-risk — as am I because of asthma — I decide to call in sick for a week, just to make sure it isn’t anything serious.

One of my clients has managed to get my personal number and gives me a call.

Client: “[My Name]? Hello!”

Me: “Hello, Miss [Client], how are you?”

Client: “I’m fine. Listen, I was just talking to my son and he is worried about all this nonsense. He wants to cancel your appointments for the month.”

Me: “Oh, that’s actually a great idea! You’re very high-risk because you’re in your nineties and on oxygen. I’m glad you listened to him. Plus, I’m sick, too, so I was really worried about infecting you if this is more serious. “

Client: “You know I don’t care. If I get this disease, then it’s a good day.”

I’m used to her talking like this.

Me: “No, no, no, you don’t want to die from this; it’s pretty bad. You want to go peacefully in bed, remember?”

Client: “Right, right. So, I won’t see you during this month. But you can stop by anytime if you’re in the neighborhood!”

I’m trying not to laugh.

Me: “Miss [Client], I can’t. The whole purpose is to keep you safe.”

She is one of my favorite clients. She’s one of those tough cookies but has a good heart. I’m sure she’s going to be super lonely this month but I told her to call me anytime she wanted to! Also, for those curious, I am feeling a little better but still coughing and having trouble breathing. Yay, asthma.

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