A client approaches me to design an ad they want to put online for their business. They know absolutely nothing about technology, computers, and just enough about the internet to create a storefront. As a result, I go above and beyond to help explain things to them, taking a lot longer than I would with other clients, but I like to do good by them, so it wasn’t a problem.

We design the advertisement as requested, and I send it out on their social media networks and other avenues.

I send an invoice for my fee and I wait. And wait. And wait some more.

Me: *Contacting them.* “Hi, just a reminder that my invoice is a few weeks overdue. When can I expect payment?”

Client: “You’ll be paid when the ad performs well enough?”

Me: “What do you mean? I can see from my metrics that your ad-reach is quite high.”

Client: “But sales aren’t up enough!”

Me: “Be that as it may, you asked me to design an ad to your specifications, and I did. I need to be paid.”

Client: “So rude! You’ll be paid when you’ve earned it!”

The client then hung up, and didn’t answer my calls, or emails, and blocked me on social media connections.

The amount wasn’t enough to try the legal option, even a small-claims court, as the fees alone would be more than I was due.

However, later on I did realize I still had access to the ads I had designed, and it was a simple matter to make a few slight changes.

The next day I get a call from the client.

Client: “You f****** a**hole! You changed the ad!”

Me: “You don’t have an ad, since you didn’t pay for one. I’m just using the ad-space I already paid for for my own ads.”

Client: “Your ads are saying I don’t pay my employees and I am a fraud!”

Me: “Well… you didn’t pay me, so…”

Client: “Take it down!”

Me: “Pay me.”

Client: “Take it down and I will pay you!”

Me: “No. Payment first, then I’ll take it down.”

Client: “I can’t pay you right now!”

Me: “The ad stays up until I am paid.”

The client screams and hangs up. The next day:

Client: “Take it down! You changed the ad again! All my customers think everything is 50% off!”

Me: “Oh, is that what I put in the ad? I forget.”

Client: “This is defamation! I could sue you for lying about my business!”

Me: “Maybe, but I also have the matter of an unpaid bill from you, as written in our contract.”

Client: “Defamation has a larger fine than an unpaid bill!”

Me: “Yes, but you know what has the smallest bill of them all? My invoice.”

Client: “Take it down!”

Me: “Also, if you can’t scrounge together the money to pay my invoice (less than $100) then how can you pay for a lawyer?”

Client: “Take it down and I will pay you tomorrow!”

Me: “Tomorrow the ad might say something about how your company is out of business and to encourage all your customers to visit [competitor] instead.”

I was paid within the hour.

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I have designed a website for a client. It was a relatively small job for her small business. It was something you would normally find on Etsy but she wanted to have her own little space online.

I am taking her through the first full build of the site.

Client: “What’s this? Cookies?”

Me: “That’s a notification users will get when they use the site for the first time. The website uses cookies. Do you recall my explanation to you for what they were?”

Client: “Yes, I remember all that. But I object to the name.”

Me: “What name?”

Client: “Well it’s a British website! It should use biscuits!”

Me: “That’s… that’s not…”

Client: “Change it.”

My brain quickly runs through the technical and legal ramifications of doing so, but instead I choose my battle.

Me: “But, think of all the potential customers you could get from America? They’ll be confused if they see biscuits, but if they see cookies they won’t leave your site.”

Client: *Mulling this over.* “Fine… I suppose.”

Disaster averted!

Related:
That’s The Way The Cookie Crumbles, Lady!
And That’s How The Kindness Cookie Crumbles
And That’s How The CEO Cookie Crumbles
And That’s How The Stolen Cookie Crumbles
And That’s How The Ninth Cookie Crumbles

When I was first trying my hand as a freelancer, I got a message asking if I would take on a project dropped by a previous artist. Excited to build my portfolio and gain experience, I gladly agreed. The client sent me an image started by the previous artist of a quick digital painting consisting of three separate images (like Polaroid photos) with a dark background and phrases like “best friends” and “I love you”. 

Me: “Okay, so you just want this finished?”

Client: “Yeah. It’s my best friend’s birthday present. I need it done in four days.”

Despite the roughness of the sketched image I was shown, I could tell that each of the three images was very detailed and would be a project in and of itself, but I really wanted to take every client I could. 

Me: “Ooh, that’s not much time, but I can do it.”

Client: “Plus, I need you to send it to her, so we’ll need time for shipping.”

Me: “I’ll just email you the finished digital painting, and you can print it from home or a print shop.”

Client: “No, I want it painted by hand on a huge canvas and shipped to her by mail. Take the shipping out of your payment.”

I was only being paid $75 for the whole project, which probably would have barely covered the shipping. Now I see why the first artist called it quits. I did, too.

Client: “We are looking for creative concepts for a chart that shows our organizational structure and corporate hierarchy. The only constraint is that we don’t want it to be a chart because they don’t connect with our clientele.”

Me: “…”

Client: “Oh, and we’d prefer that it didn’t show any hierarchy.”

I am an artist. One of my friends follows her dream and opens her own restaurant. Because opening a restaurant is expensive and I want to help, I offer a few art pieces for her to hang, free of charge. My friend makes sure I can leave business cards at her restaurant and refers people to me. I sell three pieces that way. 

About four years later, I get a call from my friend. There’s no “Hi,” “Hello,” or “How are you?”

Friend: “I need you to remove your paintings today. Get them out of here before 5:00 pm. I want them gone.”

And she hung up. This was very unlike her, but it sounded very urgent, and I picked up my paintings. Of course, I tried calling and messaging, but somehow, I was blocked and banned and I just couldn’t reach her anymore. So many years of friendship… suddenly ended, just like that?

The answer followed two months later. It turns out my friend was going bankrupt and the bank was going to file for bankruptcy the next day. Everything that was inside that restaurant would become the property of the bank… which would include my paintings. However, my friend was forbidden to talk about it to anyone, because she could be held liable for missing inventory. But since our agreement for the paintings was only verbal, she could claim that I had “already planned to pick them up that day”. 

After the ordeal had ended, I received a message from her to catch up. During a walk along the beach, she finally confessed what she had done and why she had done it. 

I’ll be forever grateful for how she looked out for me, despite being in such a mess herself. She is doing a lot better now.

This story is part of our Highest-Voted-Inspirational-Stories-Of-2023-(so far!) roundup!

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